Today, I had to bail my boyfriend out of jail. He got arrested because he was tugging his man-meat in the drive-thru at a McDonald's. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got a call from my husband asking me to bail him out from jail. He was arrested after being caught having sex with a waitress in a restaurant bathroom. FML
Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying he needed me to bail him out of jail. The crime? Masturbating in public. FML
Today, I had to arrest my own boyfriend for having sex in public. FML
Today, my boyfriend got arrested. For robbing my house. FML
Today, I was in bed with my boyfriend, starting to get intimate with him, when one of his friends walked into the room, grabbed my leg, and pulled me onto the floor. His reason? He was hungry and wanted to go to McDonald's. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had 'car sex'. It sucked and resulted in him masturbating into a McDonald's bag. FML
Today, my boyfriend went to jail for a DUI. In a panic, I rushed to go bail him out. On the way to the jail I was stopped for running a red light. I soon joined my boyfriend in jail with my very own DUI charge. FML
Today, I had to bail my dad out of jail, for beating up my boyfriend, for sleeping with my mom. FML
Today, my boyfriend dragged me to the local McDonald's, refusing to drive me home until he ate. When I mentioned how dangerous that part of town is, he stopped and went all Walter White on me in front of everyone, spouting lines like "I AM the danger" and "I'M the one who knocks, babe." FML
Today, I got to drop off my boyfriend at his newest place of residence: jail. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Tuesdaythe10th 11
McManMeat
bigdude1302 2
So tell me....does he have a Big Mac or a double cheese burger?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (107)
mollymayan 3
Your boyfriend is an idiot, & you don't seem to bright yourself for being with him.
rasta76 9
he was trying to give the big mac extra sauce
Dnigz13 4
Let's mcdonalds doesn't come put with a Mcwiener. Would you be able to order it with a straight face? Lol
Pogox 5
I'm sorry, I can't comprehend your idiocy?
supportcommand 17
Why are you referring to him still as your boyfriend? And why would you bail him out? What a loser.
goodgood_fml 5
Why bail him out? Plenty of beef in jail to tug on.
erinchick1 7
Why was he doing that in public?
jlperry31 10
When I worked drive thru.. I loved summer cause all the shirtless guys... I always made a little wish that I'd get some cute Guy showing his ****
zandalee 20
Dirty boy!
Threnody666 19
Have fun dating a registered sex offender! You should have left him in jail.
S7YX 9
If you tugged his meat more often he wouldn't have the urge to do it himself :p
spottyblanket 8
urgh how can you even look at him op, leave him in there, he sounds vile!