Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time in over a month. When I came, I thrust one last time and let out a huge fart. She couldn't keep her mouth shut about it, and now all our friends keep calling me "CumFart". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I decided to treat my girlfriend by eating her out. After a while I thought she was going to cum, but instead she farted in my mouth. FML
Today, after weeks of no sex, my boyfriend finally decided to have sex with me. While we were getting into it I accidentally farted in his face while his mouth was open. No more sex for me. FML
Today, for the very first time I got it on with my girlfriend. Unfortunately, afterwards I had a terrible tummy ache and let out a very noisy fart. I'm not sure she'll still be my girlfriend tomorrow. FML
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. When we finished, he mentioned that he made me queef. I didn’t have the heart to tell him I actually farted during sex. FML
Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML
Today, I was having 'goodbye' sex with my boyfriend. Now for the next four months he's going to remember our last time as the one where I farted and couldn't stop laughing. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time and we were alone. He was being super romantic and snuggling with me, and then out of nowhere he let out the biggest fart I've ever heard. He then explained how I should try to compete with it. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I tried to have sex, but every time he thrust into me, he farted. Loud, smelly, wet farts. After a minute, I shoved him off and demanded he take a dump. After a full five minutes of loud diarrhea, he came back to bed, his ass stinking of sewage. My pussy dried up so fast… FML
Today, my mother and girlfriend were joking around and talking about the embarrassing things I've done. After they'd had a lengthy conversation, my girlfriend mentioned, "And he always farts during sex." FML
Today, my girlfriend and I did a 69 for the first time and I was on the bottom. When she orgasmed, not only did she fart, a bit of poo came out with the fart, and actually went up my nose. I’ve gone through a whole box of tissues blowing my nose, but I can still smell it. FML
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Top comments
homesuckfucker 28
I'm sorry your girlfriend would be so disrespectful. Things that happen in an intimate situation should remain intimate. Did you let her know it makes you uncomfortable? Communication is important in a relationship, after all. Perhaps she could convince your friends to stop. If not, they'll forget about it once it stops being entertaining. Pretend it doesn't bother you! Play along with it! That's how you shake off elementary school bullies, and they seem to be at about that level of maturity.
LaColombianita 26
Lmao that's hilarious, but I definitely would have kept that as an inside joke between the 2 of you only..
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Comments (97)
ACMX721 4
I'd ditch the bitch
TreeWizard 6
I definitely thought something different when I read the headline.
missreader 14
dont worry about it it happens to everyone at some point
mistress_paz 30
She better be careful she never queefs then
cheshireau 26
What a fantastic story.. Not the being mocked but sharing it in general. Thank you.
Niedermayer_20 12
Legendary Name. I sure hope you made her ******.
demonfacee 14
That's actually pretty funny.
wallmaria 15
okay tbh that is funny but yeah she definetely shouldn't have told anyone omg
sorahearts_fml 10
That's trifling ???? lol
Faunathan 0
My buddy was ******* his wife, started coming/farting/laughing all at once repeatedly. Both thought it was hilarious