Today, I watched as my neighbor walked to my front lawn, looked me right in the eye, and pissed on my mailbox. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I witnessed my neighbor draining his sewage-clogged plumbing into my backyard. FML
Today, as I sat on the toilet, I heard a noise outside. I peered through the window and found myself staring directly at my neighbor. FML
Today, I woke up to a homeless man relentlessly shitting on my porch. FML
Today, I had to call the cops on my neighbor. I was heading off to work when I saw him actually shitting in our yard. The reason? They caught my dumbass rebel of a son on their security camera, shitting in their yard. FML
Today, my drunk neighbor couldn’t get into his apartment and thought it would be a good idea to poop in our yard. He left a pile of diarrhea under our window, and poop-stained napkins all over the lawn. FML
Today, I took my dog for a walk. He started crapping on someone's lawn, then I noticed that the owner was outside and giving me a death stare. Not knowing what to do, I picked up the crap with my bare hands. The man started laughing at me. FML
Today, I caught my new neighbor sticking his knob inside my car and pissing on my seats. His reason? I parked in his spot. FML
Today, I saw a kid taking a dump next to my lawn. The good news: his mother picked up the poop to discard it. The bad news: she put it in my mailbox. I now have a pile of smelly brownish tissue-wrapped goo baking under the hot sun inside my mailbox. FML
Today, I woke up feeling great. I opened up the blinds and looked out from my window just in time to see a man ripping my mailbox from the ground and sprinting away with it. FML
Today, my crazy neighbor screamed at me from her porch for walking "too close" to her plants. I was on the sidewalk. She sprayed me with her hose anyway. FML
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Top comments
zingline89 18
Would you prefer U Pee S?
mduffy08 8
Did you have any mail?
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Comments (207)
auntycj 0
Have him charged with public indecency.
akdakine81 2
That's hilarious
alexk92 6
Anyone else wandering if he is talking about a dog.....?
ooyt453 1
In soviet Russia mailbox piss on you
daskabinette 5
LIKE A BAWS!!
greeneye_fml 12
So take a dump on his.
Cablo_Gubla 2
Did you anger him somehow? Damn. Then again, some people are just straight up assholes like that. Listen to the track "Mutherfucker" by Beck from his 1994 album Mellow Gold, hopefully it will make you feel better about the situation and bring a smile to your face.
trolodon 2
and the whole time, you watched like a wimp
damianf60 7
Must of pissed him off
booee1985 1
Lol