Today, my girlfriend decided we are ready for the next step in our relationship. Apparently that next step is her taking a dump with the door open. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I waited for my girlfriend to get in the shower before I stripped down to try and seduce her. I got ready, threw open the door and went in. I walked in on her taking a dump. FML
Today, I found out that every time my girlfriend takes a big dump, she pretends as if she's giving birth and screams uncontrollably. I just moved in with her. FML
Today, my girlfriend felt me jump out of bed, heard me run to the bathroom and throw up, then looked up five seconds later to see me take a massive dump on her bath mat. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I enjoyed a lovely shower together. It was indeed lovely until her father came into the washroom to say “Welcome to the family!” whilst taking a giant shit. FML
Today, my boyfriend threatened to break up with me because I still close the door when I go to the bathroom. He pees and poops with the door wide open and expects me to do the same. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try a new place to eat. On our way home we both had upset stomachs. As we raced into the house we realized neither of us could hold it any longer. Having only one bathroom, I let her go first. She exploded on the toilet and I exploded in my pants. FML
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend by knocking on her door and kneeling in front of it. I forgot that her door opens outwards. FML
Today, my boyfriend of six months said he wanted to take our relationship one step further. I thought he was going to ask me to move in. He meant he wanted to fart in front of me. FML
Today, my boyfriend of two years broke up with me for not closing the door when I pooped. FML
Today, my boyfriend of 3 years drunkenly proposed to me, while sitting on the crapper, with the door open. FML
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Top comments
RyeBreadBoy 0
This can't be true. Everybody knows that girls don't poop. :P
gozar_fml 1
You should sit on her lap and drop one between her legs. After that she will always close the door and lock it.
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Comments (91)
WeStayCrunk24x7 0
dump her immediately
hotdogger789 0
thats fukkn grossss. but then again depending on how long yu guys have been together for it shudnt really matter. but still not sumthing i wud do.
xxKatieegurlxx 0
thats great lol sorry shes so creepy picka betta 1 nxt tme?
AKBIGCAL 0
#4-you are deeply disturbed, but ya that's when you walk by and make farting noises lol
myfriend_youfail 3
Just shut the door the next time you see she's in there doing her business. Yeah, at some point in time a couple should be comfortable at least ADMITTING to bodily functions around each other. Hell, my boyfriend and I are at the point where we can walk into the bathroom to take a leak when the other person is showering. But ********? Shit SMELLS, and I don't know anyone who would want that smell to spread more due to an open bathroom door. Eww.
HearMeOut 0
OP is probably just jealous because he saw his girlfriends dick while the door was open and got jealous.
bored690 0
Um... who cares? Just because the doors open doesn't mean you have to stand there and watch. ***** sake.
ddof5 0
how the hell is this an fml, ur the luckiest guy in the world
Milton14 0
Next step blumkin : )
Ninjaface 0
Actually, the "next step" is screwing her while she's taking a dump.