Today, I realized that I'm so lonely I can no longer whack off without bursting into tears and crying like a little bitch. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I know it’s pathetic to cry after sex, so you can imagine how pathetic I feel when I cry after masturbating, because cleaning my vibrator afterwards just reminds me how long it’s been since I had a man, and how lonely I am. FML
Today, I cried while masturbating because I genuinely couldn't think of a single person that would fuck me in real life. FML
Today, I realized that I'm so depressed that I can't even watch porn without getting upset about how I can't get laid. FML
Today, I realized the moans I make when masturbating sound like I'm crying. I realized this when my neighbor pounded on the door asking if I was okay. FML
Today, I started to cry while masturbating. This isn't the first time that this has happened. FML
Today, I realized just how lonely I am when I started singing and harmonizing with the vacuum cleaner. FML
Today, I finally noticed how lonely I am when I realized I was petting my couch while reading a book. FML
Today, I realised I may have some kind of problem, given that I masturbate daily, and sex with my wife no longer interests me because it takes too long, involves her instead of me alone, is too much hard work, and generally annoys me. FML
Today, I noticed that my weekend hobby is crying. I live in a city where I don't have a single friend or relative. FML
Today, it finally clicked in my mind how desperately lonely I am, when I shaved one of my legs just to find out what a woman's leg feels like. FML
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Top comments
phantumgrey 6
Watch **** and then you'll be in an orgy. No more forever alone
horrorfield 6
That happens to me too :( except I AM a little bitch. Probably why I'm lonely..
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Comments (107)
erichsalvesen 13
Give me a call ;)
perdix 31
Don't grip it so tightly!
JessStyles 12
Try not to be so hard on yourself
Jharrist89 12
Get a Pocket Pu$$y.
jnaples 3
Perhaps you should try homosexuality. Good luck. You need it. Really
MillerBeerTime 5
Just do what I do and keep a **** buddy around then when you use them up, just cut communication off completely! Vwahlah, no commitment!
Dcm210 19
We've all been there, I hope everything works in your favor.
Burton_Forever 23
Do something about it go out and have fun! Go hang out with friends!
ketchuplover 7
I thought I was the only one.. It's good to know I am not the only one who does this..
Hawaii84 16
Is time to put yourself out there and go meet new people. Is not hard to meet new people just find groups for things that interest you or go clubbing or any other social activity. There is someone for everyone out there just go look.