Today, I realized that I'm so lonely I can no longer whack off without bursting into tears and crying like a little bitch. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I know it’s pathetic to cry after sex, so you can imagine how pathetic I feel when I cry after masturbating, because cleaning my vibrator afterwards just reminds me how long it’s been since I had a man, and how lonely I am. FML
Today, I cried while masturbating because I genuinely couldn't think of a single person that would fuck me in real life. FML
Today, I realized that I'm so depressed that I can't even watch porn without getting upset about how I can't get laid. FML
Today, I realized the moans I make when masturbating sound like I'm crying. I realized this when my neighbor pounded on the door asking if I was okay. FML
Today, I started to cry while masturbating. This isn't the first time that this has happened. FML
Today, I realized just how lonely I am when I started singing and harmonizing with the vacuum cleaner. FML
Today, I finally noticed how lonely I am when I realized I was petting my couch while reading a book. FML
Today, I realised I may have some kind of problem, given that I masturbate daily, and sex with my wife no longer interests me because it takes too long, involves her instead of me alone, is too much hard work, and generally annoys me. FML
Today, I noticed that my weekend hobby is crying. I live in a city where I don't have a single friend or relative. FML
Today, it finally clicked in my mind how desperately lonely I am, when I shaved one of my legs just to find out what a woman's leg feels like. FML
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Top comments
phantumgrey 6
Watch **** and then you'll be in an orgy. No more forever alone
horrorfield 6
That happens to me too :( except I AM a little bitch. Probably why I'm lonely..
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Comments (107)
ScenicSubterfuge 39
Haha, dating site?
Strawman3rd 0
I guess I'm next in line, sad thing is I'm attractive and in a relationship smh. Been in a relationship for 6months and I haven't had sex in over a year
andrekrivo 20
why not try talking to a random person? it's not like you have anything to lose, right?
legendxs 20
Then stop being a little bitch and go outside and actually find someone to have sex with.
Threedog0214 6
I uhh I am in the same boat ahh it's truly sad.
One_Way 43
It happens to the best of us, at times. Things will get better. Hopefully by now they already have.
ftpallday666 16
Don’t worry man we’ve all been there