Today, I had to eat up a few specks of toilet paper to avoid spoiling "the moment" with my girlfriend. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was going to the bathroom at my boyfriend's house. I had awful diarrhea and was almost done, when I noticed a spider on the ground. Being terrified, I took a giant ball of toilet paper to kill it. I realized then that I had no toilet paper left to use. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky. He pulled off my panties and was about to go down on me when he said, "Wait, what's this white thing?" It was a piece of toilet paper. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I grabbed his butt to control his thrusts and got a clump of used toilet paper. FML
Today, as my boyfriend and I were messing around in his room, he took off my underwear. As he was about to go down on me, I spread my legs to help out. He then looked up at me and said, "You got some toilet paper left behind." FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend doggy-style and noticed a piece of toilet paper had been "left behind". I had such a bad internal conflict about whether to tell her or to remove it myself, I went limp. She started crying and accused me of not being attracted to her anymore. FML
Today, for the first time in weeks, my wife felt frisky, and we started fooling around. Half-way through undressing me, she bolted out, claiming she had the shits. About five minutes later, she tearfully called out from the bathroom, begging me to bring her a fresh roll of toilet paper. FML
Today, I was on a hot date. After we finished supper, we went back to his place. My stomach started to feel upset, so I politely asked where the bathroom was so I could "powder my nose;" After ten minutes of agonizing diarrhea, I looked down and noticed he was out of toilet paper. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try a new place to eat. On our way home we both had upset stomachs. As we raced into the house we realized neither of us could hold it any longer. Having only one bathroom, I let her go first. She exploded on the toilet and I exploded in my pants. FML
Today, my girlfriend sent me some nudes while I was at work, so I went into the bathroom to rub one out. When I was done, I realized there was no paper towels… or toilet paper… or soap. I'm really sticky right now. FML
Today, I sneaked into my girlfriend's house for some romantic time. Before going into her room, I took a dump in the bathroom. Once I was done, I not only noticed that there was no toilet paper left, but I heard her and her 6'5, heavyweight boxer, ex-marine father, talking outside the bathroom door. FML
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Top comments
Frankenstein611 10
Thats just nasty!
life_sucks225 13
i hope it was worth it
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Comments (258)
life_sucks225 13
i hope it was worth it
Djjooze 4
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Ugly people are nasty. Their either fat poor ugly Assymetrical and should not reproduce bro. Hit the gym and get someone decent.
SAspring 17
Did I miss something here or are you just an asshole?
golden_warrior 23
66 - being ugly and being unsanitary are two different things.
SAspring 17
Oh 66's comment is gone now. Carry on.
Jharrist89 12
I'm sure he had enough toilet paper to wipe the dirty look off his face afterwards... Hehe..
slickchrome 11
All I wanna know is what 66 said
dead_insects 18
#85... it was nothing of intelligence or relevance...your brain is better off for missing it
anythingmustbe 18
I want to know even more
JennaNGood 21
Same here... (Embarrassingly)
LolFMLnot 10
No it wasn't worth it, he could've just picked her up , made out with her while walking to the shower and continue everything there. Now that would've been a win win situation and hot.
tjv3 10
That sir is dedication
Bcfrmkc816 17
There is no way that was worth it take a shower together clean each other and have a better "moment"
bwinski 19
Eating some clitty litter?
Hxey 7
You missed something. lol
Chilupa 28
#202 you made my day!
Demon_of_Light 27
Does anyone else think this is a weird thing to be worried about? I mean, he was putting his mouth on her ******. Obviously finding toilet paper brings to mind something you really want to think about during those moments, but honestly, that toilet paper had nothing on it that he wouldn't have encountered up in there anyways.
msmidnight1965 12
Wait what?! O.o
aKaClickZ 4
Big ass *******.
Frankenstein611 10
Thats just nasty!
MizzKilljoy69 11
Some people eat toilet paper without question, its a weird habit but they can't help it, so its normal for some people
dead_insects 18
who else read that in Cleveland's voice? ^_^. but yes...thats more than a little horrid..
slickchrome 11
22 explain how eating toilet paper is a habit?
gmc_blossom 21
86- There was a lady on My Strange Addiction that was addicted to eating toilet paper. True story.
RedPillSucks 33
@22 Pica Chew
dakatabg 31
Agree, I would of passed this process
iamabamf 17
Was she addicted to eating it out of girls pubic hair? I'm going to go with no.
ise3 10
Oh i get it now. Thanks 134
Grex_fml 9
Process of reading this FML: 1-5 seconds after reading: "huh? I don't get it.." 5-10 seconds: (re-reads FML slowly) 10-15 seconds: "holy shit that's messed up" 15-1000000 seconds: "someone get me a bucket"
MizzKilljoy69 11
It was just an fyi for you guys, I've seen it in my strange addiction, it seemed relevant so i thought I would mention it
bjdog98 9
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
I'm confused. Can someone please explain?
Colecto_fml 26
He was goving her oral.
Dilwann 27
And there were pieces of toilet paper still stuck to her from whenever she went to the bathroom. And I say: in such a case it's perfectly acceptable to tell her to go wash herself, then try to get back in the mood. Better having it ruined once, than encountering a problem like that more often.
CallMeMcFeelii 14
From 5's name you really shouldn't know what's going on. Preserve the innocence of this 14 year old.
fabs1171 23
#5's name is bj - not sure there's any innocence to preserve!
gigglesmg 6
Ya
bjdog98 9
Lmao I'm not 14 and this name has nothing to do with what you think it means. Don't assume.
guy24 9
This isn't common knowledge people...
kingdomgirl94 29
its pretty common knowledge
skyttlz 32
I didn't understand it at first but after reading some comments it finally clicked.
IT_Nird95 9
The hell it isn't ...
BriannaMGK 15
He was eating her out, and there was toliet paper peices left behind!
lolen2910 3
really "bjdog98"? youre not 14? are you totally sure bjdog98? that youre not 14?
JustAReaderZZZZ 10
He's probably 15, which is why he's denying being 14! lol
deadhead419 15
Yea cause I'm 19 and I was born in 94
9astuar2 10
thanks for the awesome math lesson
jelly713 19
Poor OP. =/ that's just really gross.
sarahjanesmith 12
Seriously gross
ssjfml 12
Yuuuuuuck
Mossears133 15
I threw up in my mouth a little 0_e
chabelo 10
a taste that you'll never forget depending on what exactly came on the paper
MrsPegg 45
Oh. My. God! I just gagged at the thought of that! OP- seriously?!? *shudders*