Today, my girlfriend and I had an argument about wanting kids, as I want to have kids but she doesn’t. I explained the situation to my sister. She just kicked me in the nuts and said, “There, problem solved.” FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend woke me up by punching me in the balls. It’s OK, I didn’t want kids anyway. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML
Today, I got into a heated argument with my big sister, all because she doesn't like me having a girlfriend. She said that I either lose her or my girlfriend, and I chose to lose her. She blocked me. FML
Today, my sister went from choosing not to have kids because they just aren’t for her to being obnoxiously childfree. We can’t have a single conversation without her ranting about how much she hates children, and parents are pathetic losers. I have three kids and don’t want her around. FML
Today, my sister and mom were arguing. My sister was being really nasty to my mom, and decided to get nasty with me and drag me into the argument. Naturally, I got nasty back at her and we started fighting. My mom yelled at me for getting nasty with my sister, and kicked me out of the house for “being too nasty.” FML
Today, after careful consideration, I told my wife I really want to have kids. She laughed, until she finally realized I was serious, at which point she flicked me in the balls and said, "Problem solved." FML
Today, my brother and his girlfriend are fighting about something they agreed on YEARS ago. Every couple of months this argument comes back and his girlfriend changes the rules or the definition. I can’t believe she gonna become my sister-in-law. FML
Today, my wife and I have been in the same massive argument for two weeks. We agreed when we were dating that we couldn’t think of anything worse than having kids, we married on the basis we would never want kids. Now, a year later, she wants a baby. FML
Today, I had a debate with my girlfriend about whether giving birth or getting kicked in the balls hurts more. It ended up with her kicking me in the balls. I was the one who said giving birth hurt more. FML
Today, I brought my new girlfriend home. My overprotective sister got into her face and started the whole, "if you hurt him, I’ll kick your ass" speech. My girlfriend responded by whooping my sister’s ass up and down our driveway. It took both me and my mom to pull her off. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
MandazInTC 33
This is a difference in life values. I'm sorry to tell you that if she isn't willing to change her mind, you have to change your mind or situation. It isn't worth continuing a relationship knowing your values and wants don't align.
dragonfly08330 10
why should she have children she does not want? on the flip side...you shouldn't be deprived of having the family you want....sounds like you 2 have an expiration date
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (17)
RichardPencil 32
Cheaper than a vasectomy, I guess?
MandazInTC 33
This is a difference in life values. I'm sorry to tell you that if she isn't willing to change her mind, you have to change your mind or situation. It isn't worth continuing a relationship knowing your values and wants don't align.
kfchicken 31
I don't think that's what the FML was about
Mathalamus 25
Why would you want kids anyway...?
dragonfly08330 10
why should she have children she does not want? on the flip side...you shouldn't be deprived of having the family you want....sounds like you 2 have an expiration date
Jaymail 19
Women think they have something over men because men have nuts and they don’t. Women also have a Kryptonite. If she kicked you hard enough and you feel strongly enough about it then just come up behind her sometime with a pair of scissors. SNIP! All of a sudden her hair is only a fraction of the length it once was! 😊
Justin Bowen 7
You could also wait until she's sleeping and shave off one of her eyebrows. Or carefully trim the eyelashes of one eye. Or cut her hair AND write something on the back of her neck while she's sleeping.
Susan Yee 9
Then just break up and find someone who has the same life goal.
bobsanction 18
Time to get a new girlfriend.
Cody Vertigo Bonthoux 15
shoulda broken up and told your that's why she can't find a decent partner
Yummi_913 18
If she really doesn't want kids then PLEASE don't have kids with her. Babies can be SO difficult. There's a reason the nurses emphasise DON'T SHAKE THE BABY. Because you will find yourself in the situation of wanting to do just that many times out of frustration, desperation, and sleep deprivation. It takes focusing on your love for the kid not to do so. And if she already doesn't want a kid, she might not be able to stay level headed enough to not hurt it. If family is truly something important for you to have in your life it's best you find a woman that shares in that with you. After all, don't you want a good mother for your children instead of a resentful one? My own mother never wanted children. Lemme tell ya, it does NOT lead to a good childhood.
juggalo2 22
Don't argue with her. Just communicate. This is a huge life decision. Probably the biggest life decision you will make. If she really doesn't want children, then that could very well be a deal-breaker. That's okay. She's your girlfriend, not your wife, and it sounds like that's for the best. You could try borrowing a baby. Many parents are happy to be free for a night or three. You could volunteer as a big brother to see if you really like kids so much. Then if you still have a difference of opinion, don't argue, and probably don't compromise. Try finding someone with compatible life goals. Lots of women are looking for men who are willing to make a commitment, and want a family.