Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. I thought I'd be spontanous and spice things up, and gave her a spank across the butt. She started crying. FML
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Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. I thought I'd be spontaneous and spice things up, and gave her a spank across the butt. She started crying. FML
Today, I was having sex with a girl. Things were getting pretty hot, so I decided to smack her butt. I missed. I smacked my balls instead. Real hard. FML
Today my girlfriend was on top during sex. I went to slap her butt, missed and nailed myself in the balls. We had to stop. She wouldn't stop laughing. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML
Today, I was cuddling on the couch with my girlfriend when I started to tickle her, she asked me to stop but I continued. She had a reaction, and kneed me in the happy sacks. FML
Today, I was fingering my girlfriend. When suddenly she started crying at the peak of her orgasm, when I asked what was wrong, she replied. "I-I-I MISS HIM!" She was crying about her ex boyfriend. While I was inside her. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend and as I pulled out to finish I slipped and ended up punching her in the stomach, I came while she was writhing in pain. FML
Today, while having sex, my girlfriend suddenly broke down and started crying. Apparently, when I'm horny, my face reminds her of her dead dog. FML
Today, my girlfriend asked me to tie her up and spank her while fucking her and calling her a slut. But heaven forbid I later scream at her during an argument. She wailed and gave me the silent treatment, all because I raised my voice. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when I got a sudden agonising cramp in my foot. I cried out in pain, but he didn't stop. If anything, my cries of pain seemed to spur him on. FML
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Top comments
patrickalamo 48
50 shades of tears...
MinecraftGeek 8
Ouch, well I hope you at least asked her if she's alright...
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Comments (214)
xgetxbentx 13
Yeah, spicing things up is something that should ALWAYS be discussed as a couple first.
congele 6
Pig
cheer4everever 0
I would be crying if that happened to me!
OceanBlueSea 12
Fifty Shades of Grey much? Lol
catchbigtuna 0
Some one has daddy issues
Cosette_fml 1
What you giys think is "gental" TAKE IT DOWN 10 NOTCHES
TheyCallMeDamien 18
Light BDSM is probably out then.
bizarre_ftw 22
Always fun :/ Btw, you're a dick (or plain stupid, either or really) cuz you're always supposed to run the new/kinky shit by your parter before doing it - for example: how would you like her shoving her finger up your ass without asking you first? Doesn't sound pleasant huh? This doesn't mean don't do it, just clear it with her first, and do a tad bit of research on the interwebs so you have a general idea of the technique before hand (usually helps if your goal is to not **** up & make her cry ) G'luck with your traumatized gf :)
jakethompson 0
#152 needs to shut her ****** **** of a mouth. How about next time you be a real man and choke her with one hand while you slap her in the face with another telling her it's suppose to hurt as she starts to panic. **** a petty slap on the ass. Show that **** **** who the boss is. Ftw
88vivera 9
Why did u do that?
Eorlas 31
To quote Martin Lawrence: "You're just trying to make them feel that sting. But when you pop and plow 'em into the ******* wall...then it's starting to get brutal."