Today, I asked my kids how much they loved me. My seven year-old responded, 'I'll love you forever mummy.' My sixteen year-old responded, 'Can you wind down the window, I just farted.' FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while lying in bed with my wife, I asked her if she still loved me. Her reply "Sometimes". This I know is true because she instantly rolled over and farted on my leg. FML
Today, I asked my 2-year-old if he loved me. His response? “No mama, stop.” FML
Today, I farted in front of my husband for the first time in 26 years. He told our kids over email, and now they won't shut up about it. FML
Today, my 6-year-old son said to me, "You smell nice daddy." Surprised but flattered, I thanked him. He then added, "I like the smell of cheese!'" FML
Today, I got to take my 10-year-old son to the junior high school at which I teach. When my students questioned him about what I was like at home, he told the entire class: "Well, she farts all the time." FML
Today, I was at a restaurant with my kids. I told my 13 year old about how the very first time she said she loved me. She was 2 and it was at this very restaurant. I told her the details and even started tearing up a little. She didn't even look up from her cell phone and said, "That's fab, ma." FML
Today, feeling melancholic, I took a blanket out to the backyard and lay down to look at the clouds. My dad came out to ask me what I was doing. I told him, he smirked, squatted over my face, and farted. He then ran back inside and told my mom. She laughed. FML
Today, I told my mom, "I love you". She responded with, "What? I never told you I loved you." FML
Today, I was joking around with my eight-year-old son. I told him to pull my finger. I farted, then laughed. He decided to try it on his mother. When she pulled his finger, he crapped his pants. He told her I taught him how to do it. FML
Today, my 7 year-old looked at me and stated, "When I grow up Mommy I want to be fat just like you." FML
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Top comments
TheGuyOverThere 0
That's teenagers for you.
I_Own_Ubers 0
haha I guess i only find that funny cos I am 16, hardly an fml, more like my life is perfect cos my child has a wonderful sense of humour
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Comments (72)
LilaBear 2
You asked a sixteen year old "how much do you love me?"?? The response is really not that surprising. Teenagers often don't go in for the whole lovey-dovey-feelings type thing.
blland 0
any normal person will simply go with "oh hell... what does she want from me this time"
bittersweets 2
Yeah, more like an "my life is normal"!
Toxicair 0
I'm not that far off from 16 and I still joke with my mom saying ill send her to a nursery home when I'm older. She laughs with us because she knows it's not true.
SarcasticUnicorn 9
I always love to tell my mom I love her. And she always tells me back. But I was raised to be all lovey- dovey I guess.
clamperson 0
Rock on kid, rock on...
luvy101 1
YDI for being needy
AndelleRae 9
Hey, that IS love. If he/she didn't love you, he/she would have just ignored you and let the smell slowly waft up to you and make you gag. Read between the lines, my friend. :)
pistbag 0
lol true
elliepenguin 5
LMFAO
shananigans 0
What a question, you sound a bit needy and insecure...
Emilee101 0
you really sound quite insecure.
mandychika 0
This isn't really an FML. You were ASKING your kids how much they loved you (which, in itself, is rather odd...seems like fishing for compliments). Your seven year old responded in a very sweet way. Your sixteen year old either didn't hear you, was embarrassed by the question, or was distracted by the fact that he just farted. None of these scenarios includes your children not loving you.
Sammara 0
Just like in real fishing, when you fish for compliments, you're bound to reel in stuff you really don't want.
hayleyukulele 0
NEEDY ASS BITCH!
Katiepie93 0
Dont take it to heart. This is what teenagers are like. We cant help it. Ofcourse he loves you
TheDarkCynder 2
Yes, because obviously every member of a certain age group acts like this.
BritSkits 22
It's just generally considered teenagers want to be 'cool' and not be all lovey-dovey. BTW, I'm getting real sick of your 'age discrimination' shit. No one needed to hear it and you've posted it twice. No one's really even said anything that bad about teenagers, so really you just want to whine.