Today, feeling melancholic, I took a blanket out to the backyard and lay down to look at the clouds. My dad came out to ask me what I was doing. I told him, he smirked, squatted over my face, and farted. He then ran back inside and told my mom. She laughed. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I witnessed my dad wake himself from a nap with his own fart and start panicking in confusion. I guess I shouldn't have broken down laughing, because he demanded to know what I did to him. He didn't believe the truth and bitched me out for screwing around. FML
Today, I was laying my head on my dad's dog when he walked in. I jokingly asked my dad, "I'm cuddling with your dog, are you jealous?" At that same moment, the dog lets a massive, earth-quaking fart loose, and my dad promptly responded, "Nope!" FML
Today, the girl I have a crush on came over to work on a project. My dad rushed into the room we were in, farted, and then ran out giggling. FML
Today, while flirting with a cute nurse at my dad's bedside, I accidentally let a noxious fart slip out and she thought the foul smell came from my sleeping father soiling himself. I let her roll him over and check his ass while he cried out in pain because I wasn't man enough to own up to it. FML
Today, my dad opened my fridge, let rip a horrible fart into it, then closed it and said "There ya go, a little somethin' for supper." FML
Today, while at home, I accidentally let out a big, loud fart near my dad. When he asked what the noise was, I blamed it on the cat. I remembered too late that we don't have a cat. My dad caught on quickly and grounded me for lying in front of him. FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, my grandpa came into my room and asked for a pen. As I gave it to him, he let rip the foulest fart I've ever smelled in my life, and walked out without a word. 2 hours later, the smell is not only still there, it's filled the room. Looks like I'm sleeping downstairs on the couch tonight. FML
Today, I farted in bed like my parents do. It sounded like an unexpected trumpet. Luckily no one was nearby. I usually don't fart. It took me by surprise. FML
Today, I was at the grocery store with my dad. He let out a very silent but foul abomination of a fart. The people behind us started gagging, so he turned, pointed at me and said, "That was my daughter." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
omgshaylaaa 0
haha yay dad
hiddydiddy 0
Im sorry, but u have a funny dad :)
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (147)
omgshaylaaa 0
haha yay dad
iamthellamaking 0
learn to love the gas
InnocentLies 0
Or explain to him how sick that is. My dads gross like that too. >_<
iamthellamaking 0
love the gas and it won't be a problem even though I hate it myself
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
look on the bright side, at least he didn't follow through...
MagneticGuitar 0
OP is called Meg.
Action_Bastard 0
It's great to have a dad with a great sense of humor. FML? Not really except for the fact you fell prey to his prank.
randiZ25 0
exactly it's good to have a fun dad. it's just a fart princess not a big deal. some day you won't have him and you'll actually miss that.
Zesty697 0
71 is a win
Roadkill007 9
lol I can just see OP now, after her dad's funeral, looking for strangers who will fart on her, just so she can relive the good ole times
needleinmypants_fml 3
LOVE THE GAS OP love it.
MrFerret 0
Stop bitching it could have been worse, what if he pulled his pants down and had the stomach flu???
ThePowerOfGlory 0
agreed 71
Faceluvsyou 0
What an ass im sorry
iamthellamaking 0
wow that was an unnontentional pun
C94Slim 7
unintentionally *
iamthellamaking 0
my bed I isn't a goode speelr
unidentified_sta 5
"Unintentionally" doesn't work, just sub it back into the original comment. *Unintentional
FMLforALL 0
I'm sure it was intentional. It warrants a new statement all together.
meowmeowwkitty 0
ooohh good one... not
hiddydiddy 0
Im sorry, but u have a funny dad :)
tmmundy 17
lmao....that was funny, I agree. but the smell. gag.
whoisthisgirl 4
Hahahahahaha awesome
Leebra 6
LOL Your dad is a dick.
iamthellamaking 0
wrong side gas cums out of an ass
Falloner 0
your dads sense of humor is better than yours lol
unfortunate_13 5
that's not a sense of humour, that's being a pig.
spade1997 0
17 I'm pretty sure that's still humor
whoisthisgirl 4
lighten up it's a fart haha
bamagrl410 31
Oh sick. Plus, if you're female, I don't think that part of his body should be that close to your face... o.O
JManHobbs 0
What? Are you kidding?
iamthellamaking 0
so you are saying you want some old dudes junk close to your face
UrCommentsSuck 0
Only if you're female? Huh...
ajmb88 0
what do you mean
iFizzgig 11
t bag!!!
Wat2i2671 0
LMAOO...
squirell_AIDS69 0
LMFAO that's awesome! Your dad is a boss!
atone 0
okay Chris smoove!! lol he pulled a noob move lol
kyoungin 0
lml , agreed !
BoredomKillsinc 0
i wouldn't care if that was my dad or anyone else, if someone did that to me, i would smack them in the balls as hard as i could. no one is doing that to me, that's fcking discusting
unidentified_sta 5
Balls, balls, balls. Always in the comments someone advocates genital trauma.
IHeartJimi02 0
discusting?
FMLforALL 0
disgusting *
evybeth 0
not cool!