Mel · 6 March 2022, 00:01

Scene from a movie

Today, I'm crying in an Uber because my significant other just broke up with me. I'm crying quietly but there's no way the driver hasn't noticed at this point. I'm OK with him not saying anything, but he also hasn't changed the music. All that's playing is Pink, and not the loud, girl-power songs, but the sad, slow ones about love. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 099 You deserved it 229

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mstar · This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff ·United States

Forever alone

Today, I realized how lonely I am when I got excited over receiving my daily weather update from the Weather Channel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 083 You deserved it 2 910

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OlCasss · 5 March 2022, 16:00

Low maintenance

Today, my boyfriend told me about a girl who he loved a few years ago. He said, "She was extremely beautiful, and I fell for her for a long time. But it's like with universities, everyone wants to study at Harvard but finally ends up in a regular university that they can afford." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 209 You deserved it 129

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Anonymous · 4 March 2022, 16:00

Weebo

Today, my mom walked in on me slow dancing to "Bella's Lullaby" with an anime boy cutout. FML

I agree, your life sucks 283 You deserved it 1 083

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Anonymous · 4 March 2022, 10:00

Gamers CAN have a love life

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because I was having an affair in The Elder Scrolls Online. While ranting to my online elf husband, he got upset that I had a real life boyfriend and dumped me too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 289 You deserved it 1 904

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ManChildBF · 4 March 2022, 02:00 ·Loveland, United States

Sounds like a keeper

Today, my boyfriend came home and demanded dinner. I started suggesting things, but he threw out that we should just fend for ourselves. I made pasta and offered him some, but he decided to throw a fit and go to bed at 6:30pm without dinner. He then woke up at 9 to complain he was hungry, then slept on the couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 243 You deserved it 158

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choldcreations · This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff ·United States

Hungry eyes

Today, I was eating pizza with my girlfriend. She got sauce on the corner of her mouth so I tried to be sexy and lick it off. It wasn't sauce, it was a cluster of zits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 479 You deserved it 42 080

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Anonymous · 2 March 2022, 22:00

Stop using this as an excuse

Today, I had to tell my ex-husband I’m a lesbian. I’m not, he just keeps trying to win me back, but it worked, he now thinks there’s no chance for us. Unfortunately, he mentioned it to my mom, who “always suspected” and is now obsessively trying to set me up with every lesbian she knows. FML

I agree, your life sucks 730 You deserved it 1 679

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Anonymous · 2 March 2022, 04:00

You're so vain, you probably think this FML's about you

Today, I was told by my wife of 19 years that all the songs about cheating that she's been playing for a year and a half should have been a good enough hint. Getting a divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 230 You deserved it 118

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Anonymous · 1 March 2022, 22:00

City slicker

Today, my new boyfriend is such a city boy he couldn’t handle one night of pretend camping in the garden. Apparently, it was too cold, he ran out of Diet Coke, and just generally got bored, so he went back inside to watch TV in bed, but sure, he wants to hike in the mountains with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 047 You deserved it 213

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Anonymous · 1 March 2022, 14:00 🌶️ Spicy

First impressions

Today, my dad has such a low opinion of me, he refused to believe I have a girlfriend and instead chose to believe she's a prostitute I hired to try and impress him. My girlfriend was so insulted she dumped me, all while my dad was applauding her for her impressive role play. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 746 You deserved it 122

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Back to my shell I go · 1 March 2022, 10:00 ·Australia

News from the dating scene

Today, I realised that the first guy I've dated in five years has ghosted me. It took a lot for me to agree to go on a couple of dates with him, and I thought they went really well. Apparently not, seeing as it's been over two weeks since he last texted. Self confidence = shattered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 976 You deserved it 154

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Anonymous · 28 February 2022, 16:00 ·Zagreb, Croatia 🌶️ Spicy

No victim blaming

Today, my husband left me for the whore he cheated on me with four years ago, and then, how stupid of me, I forgave him and took him back. I guess I had this coming. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 042 You deserved it 1 007

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Anonymous · 28 February 2022, 14:00

The rest of us get it

Today, my husband refused to let my mother move in with us. He said he’d rather buy her another house than let her move in, then he actually threatened divorce before he’d let her move in. He’s never been this stubborn before about anything. I don’t get it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 282 You deserved it 2 297

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whatjusthappened · This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff ·Norman, United States

Master manipulator

Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend, because he's too manipulative. By the time our chat ended, instead of being single, I'm somehow now committed to going on vacation with him and his family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 512 You deserved it 16 421

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Anonymous · 28 February 2022, 02:00 ·Wareham, United States

Homeschooled?

Today, I found out my boyfriend didn’t know what quotation marks are. He’s 34. FML

I agree, your life sucks 887 You deserved it 133

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Anonymous · 27 February 2022, 18:00 🌶️ Spicy

YOU TOLD THEM??

Today, according to my husband's brother, he only went on a second date with me all those years ago because I gave him head on our first date. His father and stepmother supported this claim as well. I can’t decide if I’m more embarrassed they know, or furious that he told them something so crude. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 236 You deserved it 700

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Anonymous · 27 February 2022, 16:00

Thanks guys

Today, my parents couldn’t keep it civil long enough to get through my wedding without causing a massive scene. My wife was so upset, she got through the “I do’s” then left crying without waiting for the photos, so now we don’t have an official wedding album, just poor quality Facebook pictures. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 220 You deserved it 151

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Anonymous · 26 February 2022, 22:00 ·Truro, United Kingdom

Surprise!

Today, I'd been getting ready to hear my boyfriend's proposal, as his friends had told me he'd talked to them about planning it. He showed up at my house out of the blue… to tell me he's breaking up with me, only to find out he proposed to his ex hours later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 331 You deserved it 99

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Anonymous · 26 February 2022, 16:00

Consider yourself warned

Today, I was warned by a friend that unless I make more effort with my boyfriend, he'll be snapped up by someone else, and proved it by showing me text screenshots of at least three women I know who are all hoping to pounce on him when I eventually fuck it up so badly he dumps me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 899 You deserved it 302

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Anonymous · 26 February 2022, 02:00

Young love

Today, I had a horrible head injury that prevented me from going to my girlfriend's birthday party, and when my mom answered my phone, she thought my mom was a girl I was cheating with. Even after posting on Facebook, Twitter, and Snapchat, in places she hasn't blocked me on, she just commented that I was faking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 961 You deserved it 125

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Anonymous · 25 February 2022, 22:00

The dead art of the PUA

Today, I went on a blind date. She seemed really nervous, so I tried negging to loosen her up. She decked me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 162 You deserved it 2 757

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Anonymous · 25 February 2022, 18:00 ·Las Vegas, United States

Cheesy

Today, I told my best friend that there was a time that I loved her, then told her it was today, yesterday, last week, last month, last year, and listed several years before that, etc. Her response? "Wow, I can't believe we've known each other that long." FML

I agree, your life sucks 906 You deserved it 387

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Anonymous · 25 February 2022, 14:00 ·United States 🌶️ Spicy

Which is worse?

Today, I tested positive for Covid, which I got from my boyfriend. Who got it from the chick he cheated on me with. At least it's not an STI. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 475 You deserved it 165

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Anonymous · 25 February 2022, 05:59 ·Dublin, Ireland

We're all proud of him

Today, my boyfriend video-called me in the middle of the night, drunk after a night out of partying. He told me that he was chatted up by a girl and proudly exclaimed that he told her off, given his status, all the while showing large hickeys on his neck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 066 You deserved it 122

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Deadman · 25 February 2022, 01:59

It's a small world after all

Today, I ran into my ex-girlfriend at the mall. The one who I faked my death to back in Texas so I wouldn’t have to tell her I was leaving for someone else. She moved to Florida too. What a small world. FML

I agree, your life sucks 168 You deserved it 2 572

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notfunny · This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff ·United States

LMAO FML

Today, I finally confessed my feelings to my long time crush. He was the only one I've been able to muster up the courage to open up to. He replied, "lmao" and hasn't texted back since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 485 You deserved it 6 819

236 comments Share

Home Alone 33 · 24 February 2022, 14:00

Policy of truth

Today, after two months of being apart from my wife of five years, who'd returned to Panama to deal with a family issue, she innocently slips into conversation that she’s been hanging out with her high school boyfriend. When challenged, she responded, “You get to see me all the time!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 944 You deserved it 114

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Anonymous · 24 February 2022, 02:01

Bad sign

Today, I found out that a girl I had been seeing for two months used her having a brain tumor as an excuse to break up with me. She said she wouldn’t feel good for three months because of treatment, but then a month into "treatment", she posted a picture on a date with someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 884 You deserved it 147

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okay then · This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff ·Avon Lake, United States

Reasoning

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he found out my birthday is the same day as his, and he thinks we are twins who were separated at birth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 703 You deserved it 3 620

91 comments Share