Animals

Yeah, it's not the only little friend I've found. And considering that when I took the snake to a reptile handler who knew a vet for venomous snakes because it was pretty and I had noticed some scaring, it turned out that the snake had the venom glands removed (improperly and likely illegally) So I really don't think they gave a damn about their animals at all. Yeah, I've found a few dead scorpions, mostly those black emperor scorpions anyone can get in a pet store. A few more interesting snakes and a couple harmless but interesting colour mutations of ball pythons. A couple of them were literally tied in a bag and just left there. Presumably they survived by eating each other. Aside from a rattlesnake and some weird ass snake that seemed to make a ton of noise by rubbing it's scales together nothing really spectacular. Glad I have a friend who's snake obsessed who introduced me to a guy who handles dangerous snakes because I was more interested in the kind of snake that can kill you rather then the pet store variety. I point them out and he takes care of it.

OP here, first of all I didn't expect this to get published. I was just blowing off steam on my favorite site. So, for the rude people, no i am not mad the deer didn't die. If anything I'm happy. This happened 3 years ago in Michigan. It was summer and deer weren't known to be around this BUSY road. My insurance did cover the damages. Me and the deer walked away shaken but alright. I had called a officer to the scene to make a report for the insurance and he had found the deer nearby with some scrapes. The only sad thing is that Bambi's mother was watching from a nearby hill and I'm pretty sure all animals are out to get me now as this wasnt my last incident with an animal hitting my car. Thank you to the funny and thoughtful people who commented. Again, I never expected this to get published nor seen. So don't be a Dick. I'm sensitive. ???

OP here. first some bits i had to cut out for lack of room. i had just been dropped off at my truck as id stayed at a relatives house the night before so it was midday just before starting a return shift at truck rest stop and the "didnt bring my debit card" was entirely my fault as i hadnt checked in my rush to leave as id been running late id already got quite far when id realised id left it behind, also a sunday afternoon so no banks open to get a replacement card....turned out a happy ending though as i remembered i had hidden an emergency 20 in a compartment of said truck. Lesson learned i have a emergency kit with a credit card and cash just incase of attack of the birds has a sequel.

Hi everyone, I'm the OP. I can't believe after all these years I finally got an FML published! I agree with all the comments that this is incredibly sad - for almost a week afterwards I was having flashbacks about the terrible sounds and the sight of blood and hair in the heater. The second the heater started shaking I knew what had happened and tried to turn it off right away. The squeaking stopped once I turned it off, but then I could hear frantic scratching which started to become slower and slower as the minutes passed. I still feel sick thinking about it :( My lovely and brave colleague came to help me (I live in China and we are all provided flats in the same building). He took apart the heater, got the rat out (he was wedged between the fan and the top of the unit), and cleaned everything for me. Unfortunately the rat was still alive when we got him out, so my very brave colleague took him outside and ended his suffering because there was no way he could be saved (and there aren't animal hospitals in China, at least in our area). As for getting a new heater, like I said I live in China, and the owner of the university I work at is really cheap. So I'm working on it, but don't see them shelling out the money for a new heater unfortunately.

OP here, I wasn't logged in when I submitted this story, I hope the website will recognize my IP or something ! English isn't my native language, so I apologize in advance for the mistakes. I thought it had been rejected and was really surprised to read it in the FML list today ! 2017 is definitely starting well for me. My cat is a little devil, always has been, and probably always will be. Like #1, I'm used to having miaowing concertos all day and all night (I blame the siamese blood). And #10, yes she's incredibely smart (a bit too much), but it doesn't keep her from pooping on my bed/couch/carpet when she's annoyed at me, so maybe your cat is some kind of misunderstood genius as well ! Now, to all of you telling me to unplug it, here is the long version of the story : This story actually happened a while ago. I bought the piano around 2 years ago, never really got the chance to play it, and then lost the charger (?) so I couldn't play anymore. I only tried it once before loosing it, and the cat was fascinated, which is surprising because she usually hates music (she used to attack me, and not for playing, when I practiced my singing, and I had to give up on ever being able to play the whistle, harmonica or any kind of wind instrument because either she would miaow to death or run like hell to hide in the closet, and then revenge by pooping/peeing on something). Last november, I bought another charger, and as soon as I tried it, the cat went crazy, and spent the rest of the day sitting in front of the piano or climbing on it, waiting for it to make a sound. I didn't unplug it because basically the outlet is behind a bookshelf, so I have to crawl under the piano, manage to get my arm behind the shelf in the right angle to be able to push as hard as I can to get the darn thing in. So let's just say I won't do it everyday. Plus I knew she was smart, but I didn't think she'd be that smart ! So in the middle of the night (luckily I was having insomnias), I just heard the sound of the piano, and when I turned on the light saw the little furry monster jumping on it ! When she noticed me looking at her, she just miaowed happily and kept on jumping. I was laughing so much that I forgot to yell at her. After that, I just put my home phone to cover the button, so she wouldn't start again. But last week I must have pushed the phone a bit because she did it again (during the day this time), which gave me the idea for the FML :)

Hey guys, just a lil bit of clarification. I was holding onto the tree to get a good look at the blue tongue (which was over half a metre long). We're not normally afraid of her, she's come into our house (which I'll put a picture of in my profile). It's just that that day I was too near her hidey hole so she chased me. I was in the tree havin a little stare-down with her when I must have moved a little too high up because this possum comes out of no where right up into my face. Scared the shit out of me so I ****** legged it inside. I'm also 16 so I don't have a heap of options about where I live lol

The dog was in the neighbors property "chasing the livestock" she told animal control when in reality the dog was playing with the horse. I went out to retrieve my dog when she shot. Probably didn't see me. The dog has escaped several times to several locations the past three years

Didn't have an account at the type of posting this, but uh hey OP here. My pupper is about 7 years old, and hasn't really done anything close to this before; sure she has growled if you get near her bone, but this was quite a surprise. After she bit me she was a bit grumpy the rest of the day, but seems to be fine now so I'm not sure what caused her to assault me while I slept. To anyone concerned about the bite it's pretty much healed up, can only see a scratch or two left behind on my cheek.