Today, after finally getting a job offer after months of unemployment, I found out that the person who was going to hire me got fired. Which means I'm not getting the job. FML

by tjm / 12/23/2010 at 1:05am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, one of my usually unpleasant managers offered me a slice of cheese cake for doing a good job. I declined, but after some pestering on his part I finally accepted it. I have been violently ill for the past 2 hours. FML

by Anonymous / 12/21/2010 at 12:43am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, a woman came to my counter and ordered 12 donuts. I said, "OK sure, a dozen donuts." She paused, looked at me with disgust and yelled, "I said 12, NOT a dozen." FML

by morenita27 / 12/20/2010 at 8:52pm / Canada / Work

Today, after an argument with a coworker, I sent him "Sorry about being such a jerk" in a reply to a mass email he had sent. I accidentally hit 'Reply All'. I now have 32 "It's okay" messages in my inbox. FML

by Anonymous / 12/20/2010 at 5:26pm / United States (Georgia) / Work

Today, it was my first day on a £600 a week job. I was fired for being 10 minutes late. FML

by Chloe / 12/20/2010 at 1:08pm / United Kingdom (London) / Work

Today, I slipped at work while putting out a "wet floor" sign to make sure the customers didn't slip. FML

by embarrassed / 12/20/2010 at 9:51am / United States / Work

Today, my boss quit his job and stopped coming in without warning. Guess who just inherited his tasks and responsibilities without the training or pay associated with his manager role. I was hired last year as a junior system admin. FML

by promoted / 12/20/2010 at 12:29am / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, while registering at the grocery store, a customer came into my lane with a 100 piece boiled shrimp platter. Feeling hungry, I muttered "nom nom" under my breath. The old man called my supervisor. Apparently I called him a moron. FML

by Anonymous / 12/20/2010 at 12:02am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I found out that being rushed unconscious to the hospital and missing work qualifies you for termination if you don't call in, even if you have a note from the ER doctor. FML

by pissedexworker / 12/18/2010 at 10:10am / United States (North Carolina) / Work

Today, it was my first day as a promoted manager. I got fired for being late. FML

by Pouya / 12/18/2010 at 1:03am / United States / Work

Today, my car heater finally died. I deliver pizzas. In Alaska. FML

by Anonymous / 12/17/2010 at 12:30pm / United States (Alaska) / Work

Today, I hit my boss's car. It's only my second day on the job. FML

by iswearicandrive / 12/17/2010 at 12:14am / United States (South Carolina) / Work

Today, I was helping a customer when she asked if we were open on Christmas eve. I wasn't sure, so I asked my manager. My manager looked me over and said, "Yes, we will be open. Thank you for volunteering to come in." FML

by adjk90 / 12/16/2010 at 12:06pm / United States / Work