Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I realized why my sister refuses to let me clean her side of the room. She's secretly been trying to revive dead ants. FML

#20023605
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22593) - you deserved it (1573)

On 08/16/2012 at 12:05am - misc - by scarredforlife - United States (Maryland)

Today, the father of my unborn child told me he isn't sure he'll be able to make it to the birth, since there's no guarantee of when it will happen, so he can't schedule time off. This would be understandable if he actually had a job. FML

#20158967
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22592) - you deserved it (5606)

On 11/11/2012 at 1:50pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I went with my friend door-to-door selling chocolates. We went to the first house, and the guy decided to buy a chocolate from each of us. He didn't have change and neither did we, so he just took the chocolates and slammed the door in our face. FML

#18548047
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22588) - you deserved it (6381)

On 12/18/2011 at 8:52pm - money - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was on a plane and realized that the woman next to me was hiding a hedgehog in a plastic container. I'm severely afraid of hedgehogs but not wanting to give the woman up and get her in trouble, I tried to stay quiet. Which led to me to quietly hyperventilate and pass out on the plane. FML

#20445879
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22588) - you deserved it (6712)

On 01/07/2013 at 5:21am - health - by scaredofhedges (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I spent 30 minutes listening to my grandmother telling us that my cat is a medium. My boyfriend is totally convinced. FML

#14583588
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22587) - you deserved it (3146)

On 01/14/2011 at 11:24pm - animals - by inchetogb - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was chosen to MC a function at work. I developed a terrible case of hiccups which made the audience giggle and groan for the duration of my time on stage. FML

#15461657
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22587) - you deserved it (2928)

On 03/24/2011 at 3:29am - work - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, I bought my cats two new litter boxes in hopes that they would use them. They still prefer to pee on the clothes in my closet. FML

#17509957
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22585) - you deserved it (6674)

On 08/18/2011 at 1:40pm - animals - by princessbbee - United States

Today, my sister-in-law asked why I wasn't out partying with my friends to celebrate the new year. My mom then asked "What friends?". Ah, the new year begins. FML

#7072214
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22581) - you deserved it (2532)

On 01/01/2010 at 1:10am - misc - by nobffs (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my girlfriend of a year and I had sex for the first time in several weeks due to relationship problems; I came in less than 10 seconds. We're still having problems. FML

#12641347
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22581) - you deserved it (27231)

On 08/20/2010 at 5:51am - intimacy - by pathetic (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, we had a long meeting at work about how we are supposed to feel safe, and to come to the managers if we have any problems. I decided to speak up about a coworker that has been harassing me and several others. My manager laughed at me and walked away. FML

Today, the acne on one side of my face has flared up at the corners of my mouth, making me look just like The Joker. FML

Today, I told my boyfriend of 2 years that I was pregnant. His response? "That's neat. But we can still have sex, right?" FML

#5222877
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22579) - you deserved it (4347)

On 09/13/2009 at 3:04am - intimacy - by sunlightchild_14 (woman) - United States (South Dakota)

Today, after five months of not working, I have a check waiting for me at the office. Too bad the office is in another city. My gas tank is empty, and I have no money to put gas in my car. FML

#8643588
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22577) - you deserved it (3218)

On 02/25/2010 at 5:29pm - money - by arirx12 (woman) - United States (Florida)



FML's blog

  • Tania's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! How are you all doing? This week has been quite eventful for some people. Uber has been causing taxi drivers here and there to get their knickers in a twist, notable over here in France, which caused…

Friday 26 June 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: