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Today, my girlfriend and I reconciled after having a huge fight last week. We went out drinking, and things got pretty intense, so we went back to my place. We made it to the bedroom, but somewhere between her taking off my shirt and me taking off her pants, we both passed out. FML

#20043150
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21368) - you deserved it (12631)

On 08/26/2012 at 7:18pm - intimacy - by unfucked (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was at the gym and as I was pulling out my earphones and getting off my treadmill, I heard the girl behind me say to her friend on the treadmill next to her, "Wow, there have no cute guys today." Her friend replied, "None at all. It's like everyone suddenly got gay or ugly." FML

#2709
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21365) - you deserved it (1850)

On 01/26/2009 at 5:19pm - misc - by Rothaar - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went to a job interview at a small family-owned business. After the interview, the owner's son took me into his office and told me I'm not getting the job and to get out, because apparently, the old man thinks I'm "possessed by a demon". FML

#19652325
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21364) - you deserved it (1847)

On 05/20/2012 at 3:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend showed up at my grandmother's wake in torn jeans and a Family Guy t-shirt. When I took him aside asked him what the hell he was thinking, he lost his temper and stormed out. FML

#20442809
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21364) - you deserved it (3896)

On 01/04/2013 at 5:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out that my daughter has been watching Supernatural and The X-Files so she'll fit in better at school. I'm not even angry that she's suddenly a brain-dead conformist, it's just that she now has nightmares all the time and insists on sleeping in my bed. She's a kicker. FML

#19479496
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21363) - you deserved it (5329)

On 04/16/2012 at 6:00pm - kids - by orangechicken (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while cooking, I managed to burn my finger. I quickly turned the tap on and ran my finger under cold water, but apparently someone had just used the hot tap, because boiling water flooded out onto my nicely scalded finger. FML

#20017932
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21363) - you deserved it (2818)

On 08/13/2012 at 12:43am - misc - by burnt (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was working out at the gym doing squats. There was a girl there that I wanted to impress so I loaded up the bar with a lot of weight and began to do my squat. As I was going down I farted so loud that I began to laugh and fell backwards. Everyone in the room just stared at me. FML

#697920
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21363) - you deserved it (71306)

On 03/30/2009 at 3:06am - misc - by Mark (man) - United States

Today, my father-in-law called me an idiot for buying him coffee cake because he can't have caffeine. He refuses to believe that there's as much coffee in coffee cake as there is ham in a hamburger. FML

#19742192
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21361) - you deserved it (2601)

On 06/06/2012 at 1:23am - health - by 635CSi (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I left my car in a disreputable area. After picking it up later on, I heard a strange "clonking" sound. The clonking suddenly stopped when my wheel fell off; someone had stolen my wheel nuts. FML

#8941077
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21359) - you deserved it (3953)

On 03/09/2010 at 6:12am - misc - by 3-wheeler (man) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, the girl I've been hitting on for months on MSN and that I'm about to meet told me "I know you are in love, and you know I'm not". Erm, no, I didn't know. FML

#464
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21357) - you deserved it (4681)

On 12/07/2008 at 3:46am - love - by Titanic - Sent from mobile version

Today, I walked out of the store, car keys in hand, only to discover my car was missing. After a frantic search, I started to hyperventilate and a nearly had a full-blown panic attack. Then I remembered I walked to the store. I am an idiot. FML

#18460733
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21357) - you deserved it (29266)

On 12/08/2011 at 2:58pm - misc - by picklemonger - Canada

Today, I went to help a friend move into her new apartment. We were half-way through when it started to rain, and in my anger I yelled that it's like these things happen just to annoy me. Then we heard the tornado sirens. FML

#19203363
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21356) - you deserved it (3686)

On 03/02/2012 at 4:15pm - misc - by wtf did I do - United States

Today, I parked my car in a garage that cost $13 for every 10 minutes past 10 o'clock. When I came back to the garage at 10, I had forgotten where I parked it and spent an hour looking for it. I paid $78 to lose my car. FML

#2300061
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21352) - you deserved it (37590)

On 05/26/2009 at 1:39am - money - by lostcar (man) - United States (California)



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