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Today, while driving my car near a farm, I hit a man on the side of the road. I started freaking out and got out of the car to help him. It was then that I found out that I'd hit a scarecrow. FML

#19457431
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19072) - you deserved it (6426)

On 04/12/2012 at 7:53pm - misc - by questionmark707 (man) - United States (California)

Today, it was my first day of softball practice. I'm the youngest one on the team by about 2 years, so I wanted to prove I'm just as good as everyone else. Too bad I tripped in the outfield and got hit in the head with a bat. I have a concussion. FML

#8518590
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19071) - you deserved it (3938)

On 02/21/2010 at 2:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, after trying to find the perfect picture for the guy I have a huge crush on, I finally found one and sent it to him. His return picture? Himself in a Batman mask and sombrero. FML

#18516515
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19071) - you deserved it (9532)

On 12/15/2011 at 12:00am - love - by scribbles1475 (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I took my best friend to an 80's party. She drank too much and ended up puking all over the interior and exterior of my car as well as inside my right legwarmer on the 30 mile trip back home. FML

#8293318
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19065) - you deserved it (4088)

On 02/15/2010 at 9:22am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was driving home when I saw my boyfriend chundering on the side of the road, into an old lady's shopping basket. FML

#17981114
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19065) - you deserved it (2390)

On 10/14/2011 at 7:22am - love - by Jessy - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I woke up to a glorious sunrise, fresh coffee, and a bleached lawn. My neighbors on both sides have constantly fought with each other since before I even moved in, which I guess explains the note taped to my window saying, "Pick a side." FML

#20071743
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19066) - you deserved it (1301)

On 09/14/2012 at 3:50pm - misc - by thefuckman (man) - United States

Today, I decided to take a nap while babysitting my neighbors kids for the day. I was woken up by this obnoxious sound, only to find the youngest kid holding scissors in one hand, a pony tail of hair in his shorts jumping around like a horse, oh, and a bald spot on the back of my head. FML

#3620845
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19065) - you deserved it (54577)

On 07/09/2009 at 8:19pm - kids - by armybrat - United States (Virginia)

Today, I stuck one of those "kick me" signs on my friend's back for fun, and someone took the invitation. Unfortunately, my friend whirled around and beat the shit out of him. I managed to sneak the sign off his back, but now I feel like a total asshole. FML

#21243070
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19061) - you deserved it (44574)

On 08/22/2014 at 10:35am - misc - by oops (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my dad woke me up by shaking me and saying "If you're not up in two minutes, I'm lighting a firecracker in your room." Thinking he wouldn't possibly set off a firecracker in the house, much less my room, I decided to call his bluff. My room still smells like gunpowder. FML

#3479922
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19059) - you deserved it (38391)

On 07/04/2009 at 1:31pm - misc - by Singed (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was telling my sister about the stupid sorts of questions I get asked at work. She looked at me and said "I give you five years until you turn into a raging, chain-smoking corporate bitch." My mom agreed. FML

#9031003
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19058) - you deserved it (3877)

On 03/12/2010 at 8:23pm - work - by ams (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was woken up by my neighbour's dog losing its mind, and I remembered reading a story about someone ignoring a dog and later finding out that their car had been stolen. Paranoid, I went outside to check on mine. Nope. Just the damn dog barking at one thirty in the morning. FML

#19219281
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19058) - you deserved it (3572)

On 03/05/2012 at 5:28am - misc - by DamnDogs (woman) - Canada

Today, my dad used the stove to boil water. Unfortunately, he turned the wrong burner on, setting the smoke alarm off. What's worse was the smell of burning plastic that came from the coffeemaker being melted down. It's been over an hour, and my eyes still burn like hell when I walk into the kitchen. FML

#17980981
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19058) - you deserved it (2132)

On 10/14/2011 at 6:36am - misc - by cnkk07 - United States

Today, I forgot to pay for my train ride for the first time. Today was also the first time I've ever seen transit security checking for people's tickets and kicking offenders off. FML

#20125823
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19056) - you deserved it (4807)

On 10/20/2012 at 9:59pm - money - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)



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