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Today, I was on my computer when the girl that I really like instant-messages me. I went to type back, accidentally pressed control-V, and posted an entire article on how to remove genital warts. FML

#5579268
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10869) - you deserved it (31335)

On 10/01/2009 at 1:58am - health - by Garrett (man) - United States (Oregon) - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, after an argument with my pianist girlfriend about how bad my favourite song would sound on the piano, she stormed out of the room crying, leaving behind a CD. It was the piano version of the song she'd made for me. FML

#20528725
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10868) - you deserved it (66361)

On 03/02/2013 at 10:38pm - love - by douchegamer - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, whilst working as a language assistant in Germany as part of my degree, some 9 year-old German kids asked me to please speak English to them because my German was so poor. FML

#13139163
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10861) - you deserved it (14200)

On 09/21/2010 at 3:10am - kids - by themildthings (man) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I was holding a yard sale. A man came up to me and asked if he could buy a pair of red and white sneakers that I'd found in my attic and had never worn. Five bucks later, he was walking away with what I now realize was the pair of shoes signed by Michael Jordan given to me by my uncle. FML

#3455804
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10859) - you deserved it (66284)

On 07/03/2009 at 2:30pm - misc - by capcha (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was at dinner with my boyfriend and his family. We were talking about relationships, and I commented on how online dating was the dumbest thing ever. His mom and step-dad went on to tell me how they had met through an online dating service. FML

#3415575
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10853) - you deserved it (42197)

On 07/02/2009 at 12:42am - love - by dork - United States (Florida)

Today, I was attempting to teach a bunch of 2nd and 5th graders on why it's so important to face your fears and try your best. It was going pretty well, until I was attacked by a pair of butterflies. I am afraid of butterflies - I ran away screaming like a little girl. FML

#3682423
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10852) - you deserved it (40946)

On 07/12/2009 at 12:35am - animals - by tryscal - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend thought she was stronger than me so we arm wrestled. She won. I used both hands. FML

#13823567
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10851) - you deserved it (31133)

On 11/13/2010 at 2:21am - love - by looke27 - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend was driving me to her house against my will when I said, "Sometimes it's annoying that you always decide where we go because you drive." She replied, "Yeah, I wish I could be more of the girl in this relationship." FML

#482680
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10850) - you deserved it (73066)

On 03/20/2009 at 1:08am - misc - by lukey_G (man) - United States (California)

Today, my friend told me she had a stalker who had been emailing her. I laughed, and told her it was probably some fat, ugly virgin sat behind his computer all day. I then continued to describe and mock the stalker, only to realise that I was basically describing myself. FML

#3083519
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10846) - you deserved it (47298)

On 06/21/2009 at 3:26am - misc - by TheHatedOne (man) - Qatar (Ad Dawhah)

Today, I asked my mom if she thought I looked skinny in my shorts. She jiggled my leg fat, looked up at me and walked away. FML

#7228491
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10842) - you deserved it (21261)

On 01/09/2010 at 12:36am - health - by Ashy104 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I noticed a car following me all the way to my house. It was dark so I got really nervous and called the police. The person got out of the car. It was my mom. FML

#3757766
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10841) - you deserved it (24782)

On 07/14/2009 at 9:16pm - misc - by dani911 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, having turned 18, I was eager to show my mother some of the clothes I'd like to purchase with my birthday money. I flipped my laptop open only to realise I had left a "Big Latina Booty gets a fat one" window open. Her howling screams of pleasure echoed through my kitchen. FML

#16074880
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10837) - you deserved it (51186)

On 05/07/2011 at 2:08am - intimacy - by Anon (man) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, while I was at work, my wife sent me a few pictures of her in a new lingerie, to "spice up" my day. She didn't realize that I have iCloud turned on so I can share files with my colleagues. My boss and a dozen other employees received the same pictures. FML

#20040897
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10837) - you deserved it (20929)

On 08/25/2012 at 12:06pm - work - by Michael D. (man) - United States (Georgia)



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