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Today, I was sent to a customer's house to switch out a washing machine. My boss had assured me that everything I'd need was already in the truck. Halfway there, I ran out of gas and I realized I didn't have the gas card. My boss says it's my fault. FML

#19543388
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17715) - you deserved it (6661)

On 04/28/2012 at 5:21pm - work - by wowzers0889 - United States (New York)

Today, my wife stabbed my hand with a fork, making it bleed. I'd only tried to take some fries from her plate. FML

#19595631
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17711) - you deserved it (30909) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/08/2012 at 11:48pm - misc - by Mouhahaa (man) - France

Today, during dress rehearsal before the show, I came in with crutches pretending I broke my leg as a joke. I then threw away the crutches, laughed and then fell down some stairs. I am now in crutches with a broken leg. I was the lead. FML

#966838
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17709) - you deserved it (85679)

On 04/14/2009 at 9:48am - misc - by seussical65 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my dog overturned and ate my trash, leaving coffee grounds and dog puke all over my floor. She also ate the broom. FML

#20111523
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17709) - you deserved it (2404)

On 10/11/2012 at 1:08am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, while at the store, I realized how socially inept I am when I said "excuse me" to a shopping cart because it was in my way. FML

Today, my dad learned how to use the parental controls. I now have an 11 o'clock curfew. I am 17. FML

#2670
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17704) - you deserved it (5648)

On 01/26/2009 at 12:38pm - misc - by dangyo - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was in a public toilet, enduring an extremely awkward silence between myself and the person in the next stall. In my rush to get out of there, I managed to get my ass stuck in the toilet seat, and ended up being pulled out by the maintenance men. FML

#20177662
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17703) - you deserved it (7154)

On 11/25/2012 at 1:56am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I lied to a group of 8 year olds about having a boyfriend. FML

#12049549
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17701) - you deserved it (27522)

On 07/22/2010 at 7:08pm - love - by jennavankirk - United States

Today, I told myself: "Go on you big geek, go outside, get some sun, get your ass away from in front of your PC, go for a walk". I finally muster the courage to leave my house. Without my keys. I've been in an internet cafe for four hours. FML

#519
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17700) - you deserved it (7599)

On 12/15/2008 at 2:11am - misc - by Dr_JF - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was at my job life-guarding, when a woman pushed the spine-board over, hitting me on the back of my head. She laughed, but I now have a concussion and a stiff neck, and my co-workers can't stop laughing at the "irony." FML

#19591635
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17694) - you deserved it (1357)

On 05/08/2012 at 10:00am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I bought a coral colored hooded sweatshirt, which my girlfriend told me was "hot". I wore it to a baseball game tonight. When it got cold I put the hood over my head, only to hear everyone behind me laugh. The back of the hood said "Boy crazy". It was a teen girls sweatshirt. FML

#963370
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17692) - you deserved it (64288)

On 04/14/2009 at 1:10am - misc - by khood (man) - United States

Today, I watched my dog chase his tail for ten minutes, thinking "wow, dogs are easily entertained." Then I realized that I'd been watching my dog chase his tail for 10 minutes. FML

#15762337
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17689) - you deserved it (36469)

On 04/12/2011 at 10:20pm - animals - by Anonymous -

Today, I tripped on the way back from collecting a prize in front of 600 students and their parents. I got more applause than I did when collecting the prize. FML

#19877317
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17689) - you deserved it (1833)

On 07/01/2012 at 7:03pm - misc - by plzdontclapme -



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