Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today , I was apparently tired enough to spray silly string under my armpits rather than deodorant. FML

#18920760
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21010) - you deserved it (6184)

On 01/26/2012 at 10:22pm - misc - by ParkerRommel (man) - United States

Today... I was gatting raady for a party and accidantally knockad my blandar off tha countar. Aftar taking a half an hour to claan up all tha glass... I want upstair to gat tha spara blandar I kaap in tha closat. I trippad... and broka tha blandar. I just appliad for a waitrassing job. FML

#7115601
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21006) - you deserved it (5821)

On 01/03/2010 at 12:04am - misc - by cutiepatootie (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I went out to lunch with two friends from high school!! We saw a girl that we graduated with at the restaurant!! The girl gave both of them hugs and introduced herself to me!! FML

#748
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21003) - you deserved it (1821)

On 01/07/2009 at 10:42am - misc - by bex - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I told mah dog to give me the stick he had in his mouth so I could throw it for him. After I pickd it up I realizd it was a drid-out piece of shit. looool real FML

#21338477
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21004) - you deserved it (12209)

On 01/16/2015 at 7:37pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, A Schoolmate I've Always Secretly Hated Cummed Over To My Place To Hang Out. She Found Her Way To My Room And Instantly Noticed My Dartboard, Which I'd Taped A Picture Of Her Face Onto. FML

#21246638
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21000) - you deserved it (42841)

On 08/27/2014 at 6:57pm - misc - by Woops (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today... I had an in-depth conversation at work about how technically Luke Skywalker was never a Jedi Master. Highlight of working day. FML

#20497564
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20995) - you deserved it (5258)

On 02/07/2013 at 9:56pm - work - by djxerxes9000 - Canada

Today, I mentioned to mah girlfriend that I'd sent in a job application after she went home. In front of looool her parents. Who thought she'd stayed the night at a friend's place. FML

Today, I ave to be at work wit a smile on my face,ilst sitting next to te assole tat dumped me last week. FML

#1869
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20994) - you deserved it (4919)

On 01/20/2009 at 10:16am - work - by Heartbroken - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I Diagnosed A Patient With A Spastic Colon!! For Some Reason, The Term ( Spastic Colon ) Has Always Amused Me, And I Burst Into Uncontrollable Laughter As I Said It!! By The Time I Managed To Stop Laughing, Eyes Were Watering And Patient Was Visibly Angry!! FML

#21002747
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20994) - you deserved it (43560)

On 12/23/2013 at 6:11pm - work - by dr immature (man) - United States (New Jersey)

2day I finally summonad tha couraga to ask my dad to pay ma as ha promisad, aftar I cut tha lawn an claanad all tha housa windows last waak. His rasponsa was, ( Gat fuckad. ) FML

#20188543
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20993) - you deserved it (2710)

On 12/02/2012 at 8:57pm - misc - by :/ (woman) - United States (California)

Today... I went over to this girl's house that I really like. I was planning on cooking her dinner. In the process... the grease in the pan got too hot an caught fire. We endd up having to call the fire department. FML

#13340119
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20992) - you deserved it (7529)

On 10/06/2010 at 5:31am - love - by fireman (man) - United States (Missouri)

my boss trew out te report I wrote 4 te board of directors. He said tat if it were legal , e'd smas me in te balls wit a brick 4 using Comic Sans. I ad to do te wole ting again in anoter font wit coworkers snickering at me. FML

#21238351
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20992) - you deserved it (51133)

On 08/15/2014 at 5:35pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was walking across a pedestrian crossing and waved at the driver of the car who'd stopped, just to say thank you. She stuck her middle finger up at me. FML

#19515959
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20990) - you deserved it (2560)

On 04/23/2012 at 9:00am - misc - by hoggypig -



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: