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December 2012

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Today, I found out that the tinsel on my Christmas tree is worth a couple of hundred euros per strand. Well, that's how much the two that were surgically removed from my cat have cost me. At least the cat's going to be fine. FML

#20410843
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20443) - you deserved it (13017)

On 12/21/2012 at 5:02am - animals - by I Like My Cat (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, I bought some expensive fabric softener since I'm not too keen on my detergent's smell. Only after washing two weeks worth of laundry did I discover that mixed together they realistically mimic the smell of fresh puke. FML

#20189162
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20381) - you deserved it (3638)

On 12/03/2012 at 6:40am - misc - by backtothelaundrettethen (woman) - Germany

Today, I got punched in the face after a stranger asked for a light, didn't realize it was a butane lighter and burnt the tip of his nose lighting his cigarette. Now my nose looks worse than his. FML

#20193519
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20155) - you deserved it (3163)

On 12/06/2012 at 6:30am - misc - by chinousmc - United States (Florida)

Today, after giving my mother and my girlfriend their Christmas presents, I realized just how similar they looked both in box size and wrapping paper. I noticed after my mother gasped upon finding a vibrator in her box. FML

#20420433
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19997) - you deserved it (53732)

On 12/25/2012 at 2:12am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, at a post-Christmas party, I saw a cute girl standing underneath a mistletoe. I walked up to her and pointed out that we were both standing under a mistletoe. She looked at me, winced, and quickly walked away. FML

#20424412
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19977) - you deserved it (23258)

On 12/26/2012 at 9:09pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, in the "end-of-the-world" spirit, I asked my boyfriend to marry me. His response was, "It's really windy out." FML

#20410172
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19919) - you deserved it (28018)

On 12/20/2012 at 11:05pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I sent an email to my boss saying I'd fixed a glitch in our mail servers. He called me later, angrily shouting that I'd done a piss-poor job of fixing it, because my email had spammed his inbox with several hundred duplicate messages. FML

#20399685
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19296) - you deserved it (10720)

On 12/14/2012 at 6:16pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Somerset)

Today, I checked my sister's diary, because I was worried about her recent angry and withdrawn behavior. She caught me in the act, and my mom, whom I've caught blatantly snooping through my stuff multiple times now, grounded me for my "disgusting" violation of my sister's privacy. FML

#20430472
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18941) - you deserved it (35302)

On 12/29/2012 at 6:17pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I realized something: when other people are drunk, they dance around and make out with people. When I'm drunk, I apparently think it's a great idea to chew on electrical cords. FML

#20429355
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18325) - you deserved it (30747)

On 12/29/2012 at 2:30am - misc - by almostkilledmyself - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I took my child to the park. Having been there an hour, another mum came up to me and we started talking. She then told me that one kid had been harassing her children, pointing to my child. When she asked which one was mine I pointed to a random kid. It was hers. FML

#20415890
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17845) - you deserved it (49469)

On 12/23/2012 at 10:02am - kids - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, I saw a man in an army uniform. As a bit of a patriot, I went up to thank him for his service. After about 10 minutes of me going on and on, he started laughing. He wasn't a soldier. FML

#20405129
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17641) - you deserved it (28206)

On 12/18/2012 at 2:48am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a woman at work was complaining about her weight. She looked pretty thin, so to make her feel better, I said that she looked small. She said "Well, you haven't seen me naked." For some reason, I replied, "Not that you know of." FML

#20417936
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17036) - you deserved it (38461)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:37am - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I bought my son a nice car for his 18th birthday. When I gave it to him, he just got mad and told me that if I really wanted to spend that much money on him, I should've used it to help him pay for college. FML

#20192045
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17002) - you deserved it (53141)

On 12/05/2012 at 6:27am - kids - by Anonymous - Israel



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