Today, my boyfriend was over. I asked my dad how long until dinner was ready, his reply was, "Five minutes, so no, you can't go upstairs for a quickie". FML
I agree, your life sucks (19370) - you deserved it (4492)
On 04/04/2012 at 5:11pm - intimacy - by KatieB (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)
Today, my boyfriend gave me a hickey. On my forehead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19466) - you deserved it (6891)
On 04/02/2012 at 10:02am - love - by IloveJapan (woman) - Japan
Today, during sex, my boyfriend stops and asks if he can eat a sandwich while we do it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20197) - you deserved it (3031)
On 04/05/2012 at 10:11pm - intimacy - by Krissy (woman) - United States
Today, I found out the guy I've been crushing on for many years thinks he's a werewolf. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19060) - you deserved it (3095)
On 04/27/2012 at 11:24am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, when his sister knocked on the door and asked if she could borrow the zombie movie we were watching after we were done with it. We weren't watching a movie; I was just moaning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9636) - you deserved it (19970)
On 04/04/2012 at 1:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML
I agree, your life sucks (16902) - you deserved it (1818)
On 04/25/2012 at 2:22am - intimacy - by intheairtonight (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, my mother made me see the doctor to see if I had irritable bowel syndrome, on the account of how often I go to the restroom. I then had to admit I only go in there to get away from my family. My doctor thought it was hilarious. My mom didn't. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17935) - you deserved it (1908)
On 04/09/2012 at 10:51pm - health - by emoflowers - United States (Texas)
Today, my boyfriend said he was going to give me breakfast in bed before he left. He walked over, threw some granola bars on the bed next to me and left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17753) - you deserved it (2618)
On 04/21/2012 at 9:04am - love - by still hungry - United States (Illinois)
Today, my mum bought a phone. Since teaching her how to text, I have received 27 messages, repeatedly saying the word "penis". FML
I agree, your life sucks (16976) - you deserved it (3140)
On 04/21/2012 at 5:26am - misc - by jaderie - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I had my headphones on while on the bus. I didn't realize how loud the music was till the woman sitting next to me punched me for changing her favorite song and then "ignoring her" when she asked me to put it back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16019) - you deserved it (6150)
On 04/28/2012 at 12:41am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, while I was getting out of the shower, I saw a spider climb into the ceiling vent. Wanting it to come out so I could kill it, I turned on the fan. It came out, along with a dozen of its friends. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25101) - you deserved it (5675)
On 04/08/2012 at 12:39pm - animals - by dcort - United States (New York)
Today, my girlfriend saw the name "Melissa" on my phone's contact list. After refusing to tell her who it was, she accused me of being a cheater, broke up with me and stormed out of my house. Melissa is the name of a woman from Craigslist who was going to sell me an antique engagement ring. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32299) - you deserved it (6879)
On 04/13/2012 at 1:09am - love - by rejected - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I posted on Facebook saying I'm in a new relationship. One of my buddies said, "You're cheating on Jill?" My girlfriend saw this and went completely nuts, not giving me a chance to explain that "Jill" is just a euphemism for your hand. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20232) - you deserved it (3846)
On 04/03/2012 at 2:10pm - love - by jackmehoffa (man) - United States (Wisconsin)
Monday 17 June 2013
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