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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I got a job. My parents have decided it's now a better idea to take money from my paycheck instead of grounding me. FML

Today, it's been three weeks since my dad finished growing what he calls a "Jesus beard" and gone out asking for donations and claiming to be Jesus Christ. I've been trying and failing to get a job for 2 years, and he's already raking in cash from gullible idiots. FML

#21247834
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36244) - you deserved it (3206)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:16pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I tried to contact my college's financial aid office. After listening to the same damn "Our counselors are busy" message for over an hour, someone picked up the phone and hung up immediately. FML

Today, I witnessed my karate instructor whimper and practically piss himself as a guy walked up to him in the street and demanded his wallet. What a total waste of hundreds of dollars' worth of lessons. FML

#21244527
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33550) - you deserved it (3704)

On 08/24/2014 at 4:45pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my 24-year-old, unemployed brother stole all of my food money and went out with his friends. His punishment from our parents? He has to pay me back when he gets a job. My stomach has to wait. FML

#21241750
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40150) - you deserved it (2598)

On 08/20/2014 at 2:59pm - money - by HungryStudent (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, my car got towed. My money is in my car and they won't let me open my car to get money until my car is "released". FML

#21238660
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38798) - you deserved it (4441)

On 08/16/2014 at 12:30am - money - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, while walking to work, I saw a homeless guy with a funny "NEED MONEY 4 BOOZE" sign, so I gave him a few spare dollars for his humor. On my way back home, he was out cold on the sidewalk with several empty bottles beside him. Whoops. FML

#21238336
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18514) - you deserved it (35164)

On 08/15/2014 at 5:10pm - money - by thoughthewasjoking (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I managed to get a €5 note tangled in the zip on my purse. I couldn't open it without ripping it to shreds. FML

#21231531
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33612) - you deserved it (4620)

On 08/07/2014 at 4:23am - money - by MoMoneyMoProblems (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my neighbour casually mentioned that he sold my car's GPS that I'd let him borrow. He figured I wouldn't be needing it anymore since I lost my license. FML

#21228738
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37223) - you deserved it (4900)

On 08/03/2014 at 8:19pm - money - by lovethyneighbour - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I spent my afternoon rummaging through old jeans and other pants, due to being broke and needing cash for ramen. FML

#21226442
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34693) - you deserved it (4374)

On 08/01/2014 at 1:33am - money - by baconistasty27 - United States (California)

Today, the city shut off our water, because they said we didn't pay the bill. Turns out, it was sitting on their desk the whole time. I guess sending someone out to turn off our water was easier than checking to see if we'd actually paid the bill. FML

#21225552
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39561) - you deserved it (2492)

On 07/31/2014 at 3:35am - money - by fedUPwithPEOPLE (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I woke up from a horrible nightmare. What was it about? Me accidentally scratching a non-stick pan with my utility knife. FML

Today, I was helping out at my church. At lunchtime, a really cute guy my age walked over and told me I was pretty. I was flattered, until I turned around and saw his annoyed buddies handing him several dollar bills. FML

#21212865
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44644) - you deserved it (3655)

On 07/18/2014 at 12:45pm - money - by what people do for money - United States (Texas)



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