Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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Man or woman?

Today, after months of constant encouragement from my friends, I went and entered a singing contest. I sang and was booed off stage. Later on I found out my friends lied to me about my ability to sing, just so I could give them a cheap laugh. FML

#6759322
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27504) - you deserved it (6030)

On 12/15/2009 at 12:23am - misc - by Dean (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend asked me why girls don't have armpit hair. FML

#6758302
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29532) - you deserved it (5672)

On 12/14/2009 at 11:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had to call 911. Why? My fireplace caught on fire. FML

#6753816
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23467) - you deserved it (6068)

On 12/14/2009 at 7:00pm - misc - by fire - United States

Today, my little brother punched me in the stomach. When I didn't flinch and he asked me why, I decided to be funny and tell him I was Iron Man and nothing could hurt me. Two seconds later he took a step back and kicked me in the nuts as hard as he could. FML

#6753896
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11409) - you deserved it (34681)

On 12/14/2009 at 6:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was at my 10 year high school reunion. I saw the girl I used to have a BIG crush on, so I decided to go over and say hi. She screams when she sees me. Then, she starts hitting me, looking panicked. I control her and ask why she's hitting me. She says 'Everyone thought you were dead!' FML

#6753136
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39403) - you deserved it (2453)

On 12/14/2009 at 4:21pm - misc - by Ghost (man) - United States

Today, I was taking the final exam for one of my classes. The teacher came over to my desk, grabbed my test and ripped it in half. Then he grabbed my hand and read the note I had written on it to remind myself to pay rent. FML

#6752587
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40160) - you deserved it (5992)

On 12/14/2009 at 2:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was on a plane. The person sitting next to me was using the plane's wifi, and was on Facebook. They joined the group 'I hate sitting next to fat people on airplanes'. FML

#6752282
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36414) - you deserved it (10965)

On 12/14/2009 at 1:49pm - misc - by fatman (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I got an email from the Law School Admissions Council saying that they received my request for my LSAT cancellation and they are confirming that it has been cancelled. The email also said the score will not be reinstated for any reason. I never requested for my score to be cancelled. FML

#6751692
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29447) - you deserved it (1936)

On 12/14/2009 at 12:20pm - misc - by dahlia87 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was sitting on the bus to the gym. I saw that an old woman needed help to get off the bus, so I got up, and helped her off. When I had finally got her down the stairs the bus closed the doors and drove away. I was in the middle of nowhere and the bus drove away with all my things. FML

#6749647
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28384) - you deserved it (4215)

On 12/14/2009 at 6:19am - misc - by busmanhoe (woman) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, after taking my clothes out of the washer, I noticed at the very bottom of the washer my boyfriend's USB stick I found a couple of days ago. The USB stick contains his English essay, and his novel he has been working on for almost six months. FML

#6746306
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12018) - you deserved it (28962)

On 12/14/2009 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to the grocery store where this really cute guy works. I swiped my card but the machine wouldn't read it. I swiped it quickly some more before getting frustrated and saying, "Your stupid machine doesn't work!" He took the card and turned it around. His face said it all. FML

#6741801
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5351) - you deserved it (34275)

On 12/13/2009 at 8:27pm - misc - by MissSmarts (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was accepted to college and received a scholarship equal to almost half the tuition. After sharing this news with my parents, I spent the next 35 minutes getting yelled at about how I wasn't allowed to go there because my boyfriend might go there. FML

#6740380
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34848) - you deserved it (2070)

On 12/13/2009 at 6:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)



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