Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, as I walked around town I noticed some guys and even a couple of girls checked me out. When I got home later I realized they probably weren't checking me out, so much as wondering why the hell I had thick black eyeliner on only one eye. Oops. FML

#21523085
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16607) - you deserved it (4569)

On 02/05/2016 at 2:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my dogs somehow pulled the water spigot off the wall in my backyard. I now have my own private lake. FML

#21523045
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17738) - you deserved it (1514)

On 02/05/2016 at 11:07am - misc - by Hreid254 - United States (Texas)

Today, as my brother parked in our hotel's parking lot, I told him to be careful because the car wasn't straight. He retorted, "Yeah, just like you". My mother was in the back seat and heard everything. I hadn't come out yet. FML

#21523010
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20111) - you deserved it (2641)

On 02/05/2016 at 7:37am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my psycho-obsessed ex-girlfriend blabbed all about how she got a check in the mail for $1000 from CrimeStoppers on Facebook and Twitter. This explains how my current girlfriend and two of my friends all got arrested last week for having weed. FML

#21522828
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18465) - you deserved it (4297)

On 02/04/2016 at 5:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, Southwest officially called off the search for my lost baggage and asked me to file a claim for reimbursement. My bag had $2000 worth of dental instruments, which I won't get any compensation for since the airline doesn't take any liability for valuable items. FML

#21522618
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20084) - you deserved it (1715)

On 02/03/2016 at 11:47pm - misc - by InDebt (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, while I was taking a shit, a guy went into the next stall and narrated what he was doing in song. I'm still traumatized by his lyrics. FML

#21522585
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19693) - you deserved it (1517)

On 02/03/2016 at 10:13pm - misc - by Lord_Nick (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, while on the tram with my friend, we ended up discussing religion. When we started talking about God, some guy asked us, in a serious tone, to "stop talking about me" because it was really starting to bother him. FML

#21522467
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17669) - you deserved it (2125) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/03/2016 at 10:44am - misc - by DieuEstUnHomme (woman) - France (Champagne-Ardenne)

Today, my mum had no legitimate reason to have her daily yell at me, so she resorted to bitching me out for putting her phone on charge after it started beeping with a low battery warning. FML

#21522391
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20033) - you deserved it (1292)

On 02/03/2016 at 10:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I was at the gym. At the end of my workout, I realised I lost the bundle of keys I had in my pocket that contained the key to my locker with all my stuff. I panic and start looking for them. After an hour of desperate searching, I find them thrown in the bottom of the public toilet. Thanks. FML

#21522144
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19423) - you deserved it (1759)

On 02/02/2016 at 3:27pm - misc - by oh, shit...... - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, my dad thought it was a great idea to text me and say he decided to put our dog down. I was in the middle of class and still had hours left at school. It's not fun to walk across campus holding back tears. FML

#21522136
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23338) - you deserved it (1424)

On 02/02/2016 at 3:05pm - misc - by wideeyeddays (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, after years of lonesome birthdays overseas, I am finally able to celebrate the occasion at home. My best friend of 10 years will not be attending because her boyfriend of two months is having his party the same night. FML

Today, my mailman refused to deliver my mail for an undetermined amount of time, because my 8 year-old, arthritic dog, who can barely walk, "made him feel threatened." FML

Today, I was driving back home when I saw a yellow object flying off my roof of my car through the side mirrors. I thought nothing of it, then I noticed that I didn't have my phone with me. That's when I realized that the "flying yellow object" was my phone. FML

#21521941
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17196) - you deserved it (6270)

On 02/01/2016 at 10:48pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)



FML's blog

  • Eni's illustrated FML
  • Greetings worshipers of lines and colours! This week, with the help of a talented young illustrator we’re checking kids out. No, not like that. Damn, that sounded bad. We’re taking a different look a…

Friday 12 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: