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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, a very drunk woman at the family Christmas party told me she felt terrible that I don't have a mother who cares about me. She is my mother. FML

#21324062
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31803) - you deserved it (2008)

On 12/25/2014 at 3:20pm - misc - by anon - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend's dad called to say she wasn't allowed to come with me on a three-day trip on New Year's. He waited until Christmas to say it, even though we booked and paid for the trip nearly a month ago. Now he ruined both holidays. FML

#21323987
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33421) - you deserved it (2856)

On 12/25/2014 at 1:36pm - misc - by sneeuwbal - Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant)

Today, at Christmas dinner, my grandmother talked about the death of every single dog she ever had. All 10 of them. FML

#21323815
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29664) - you deserved it (2461)

On 12/25/2014 at 6:47am - misc - by dunn76 - United States

Today, as I walked into McDonald's with my mom, she glanced at me and said, "Smells like your future." FML

#21323487
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29693) - you deserved it (3621)

On 12/24/2014 at 6:56pm - misc - by anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up while staying at my friend's house. I saw the bathroom light on, so for a laugh, I got up and quietly pennied the door. After laughing at him struggling to open the door, I decided to let him out. Turned out it wasn't my friend in there; it was his dad. FML

Today, I found out the person who's been stalking and harassing me online was actually my now ex-boyfriend. He only confessed as I finally picked up the phone to report it to the police. He basically said he wanted me to turn to him for comfort and protection, so he could "feel like a man". FML

#21323138
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30678) - you deserved it (2330)

On 12/24/2014 at 7:03am - misc - by jflac (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my husband came home with a Christmas gift from a coworker. It's the same thing I got him. FML

#21323028
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31309) - you deserved it (2832)

On 12/24/2014 at 12:56am - misc - by now what - United States (California)

Today, while shopping with my father, I had to use the restroom. As soon as I opened the door to the men's room, my father yelled that it was the ladies' room. I then turned around and went through the other door, where I ended up getting bitch-slapped. FML

#21322769
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28011) - you deserved it (5533)

On 12/23/2014 at 3:46pm - misc - by wowdadreally (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I learned to never invite my father to a wedding. He'll show up late, complain about the food, piss on a tree, and leave. FML

#21322693
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29933) - you deserved it (2583)

On 12/23/2014 at 1:25pm - misc - by Unknown - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was yelled at in public for staring at a guy in a wheelchair. I was staring 'cause he was so good looking. FML

#21322556
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34150) - you deserved it (4262)

On 12/23/2014 at 6:28am - misc - by anonymous - Austria (Wien)

Today, I was t-boned and my truck was rendered useless. I was given a ticket even though the man who hit me ran a red light. Why? Because there was dirt on my license plate. FML

#21322311
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31456) - you deserved it (2578)

On 12/22/2014 at 9:22pm - misc - by killerxdeagles - United States (Kansas)

Today, my mother brought over some early Christmas presents for me and the kids. The kid's presents were fine, mine however consisted of many yard accessories, including solar lights. I live in an apartment building with no yard. Her response? "Buy a potted plant and shove them in there." FML

#21322225
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25422) - you deserved it (2146)

On 12/22/2014 at 6:15pm - misc - by thanksmom (woman) - United States (South Dakota)

Today, I asked my grandpa why he spoils me so much. He told me it's because he truly believes no one else will ever want to. FML

#21322081
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31231) - you deserved it (2738)

On 12/22/2014 at 1:40pm - misc - by bxjxj - United States



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