Today, I woke up at my crazy ex-girlfriend's house, naked and disoriented. You know, the kind of crazy like we-didn't-break-up-it-was-just-a-fight now-we-can-get-married crazy. She says everything's fine now and she's so glad we've "started our family." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out my fiancé is already married. His "crazy ex-wife" is not all that crazy, and is still his wife. FML
Today, I found our that my crazy ex, who, after our break up, said to me, "I'm setting my life to make yours hell" has befriended my current girlfriend. FML
Today, I went to work things out with my girlfriend, with whom I'd had a huge fight with. She told me the night before to come over at noon and that she would be awake. I unlocked the door to see that the place was a mess. She'd thrown a party and was still passed out naked next to her boss. FML
Today, my ex-girlfriend woke up from a coma that lasted a few months. Her parents called me from the hospital shortly after because she was in hysterics that I wasn't there. Apparently she thinks we're still together, and I now have to somehow break up with her again after almost a year apart. FML
Today, after a month of sobriety, I woke up in my ex-girlfriend's house with absolutely no recollection as to how I got there. FML
Today, my girlfriend woke up in the middle of the night, crying. When I asked her why, she said that she had a dream where we were getting married. FML
Today, I woke up in a pool of what felt like sweat and tears. Little did I realize, my then-girlfriend had snuck into the house and drenched me in salty water to get me back for kissing her sister. I guess we're even now. FML
Today, I woke up only to find my half-naked drunk mother in my living room, talking in her sleep about how much she hates me. She still doesn't see what's wrong with this picture. FML
Today, my ex-girlfriend proposed to me, at my wedding. FML
Today, my psycho ex got into my wedding ceremony and attacked my wife. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Anon17564 3
I think being drugged and raped is a bit too much for just FML... Go to the ******* police.
Zwische 13
....the ****?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (287)
Zwische 13
....the ****?
funnyduck0 0
Yeah no kidding - just a stupid twist on a repetitive (and popular) FML.....wtf indeed.
vapors 0
For everyone not reading the comments on this, read every last one, they're more hilarious then the FML. Sucks too be you OP, I've been in an similar situation, I woke up in time through.
Fucktroll 0
............««»»/................... /.........../(.(^)..)............ |............|../''..|..............| ................|||.................. ............( )( )/............... Hott ;)
im_asian 0
LOL @ the last part. Game Over, man
twinscrplayer6 0
may I ask how the hell the op deserved being raped???
fmlikecrazy 0
what?
ng7899 0
Aw, feminazi losers make me smile, :)
Zintrix 6
Ha it's funny cause you live in the Virgin Islands
Anon17564 3
I think being drugged and raped is a bit too much for just FML... Go to the ******* police.
Herbal_fml 0
Agreed.
Mooshki 0
Yes.
fmlfmlfml15 0
I agree, and this is just my opinion, but why is it that when I guy rapes a girl, it's horrible, but when a girl rapes a guy, its horrible yet slightly humorous.
CDS09 0
social stigma. It does not make it any better, but in general society does not look at it in the same way....like wives who hit husbands or men who get sexually harassed by women in the work force. I am not saying these things are always written off, but sometimes they are. Needless to say, dont even go within 100 feet of her.
Jotham 0
Are you going to tell the police you get raped by your ex-girlfriend?
13yearoldboy 0
definitely tell the cops
iwenttherebuddy 0
totally that girl is a crazy bitch !!!
Bob31_fml 4
actually, I am unaware of that kind of crazy.
Vaetrus 0
Agreed. Wherever you found her.. Leave the continent.
Polionixon 2
whatttttttttt you guys must be young. THERE arer TONS Of crazy ass bitches out there like that.... i've heard some stories... OHHH i've heard stories...
toink 0
No more Virgin Islands! :(
whiterabbit_fml 0
Restraining order. Get one.
omgznoes 0
i second that motion
pwnage79 0
ditto! lol billy & mandy references
geoffmp 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Wow I'm surprised u were able to get it up while drugged but damn that sucks is she atleast cute FYL indeed
WhyAmUHere 19
The way women can rape men usually involves roofies as well as Viagra. Get the idea?
hockey25 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
haha
scarlett29 0
Ha. FYL.
2345_fml 0
We need to get some better people to moderate.
erfia712 1
How do u see moderated comments
timboLDS 0
DUDE I KNOW EXACTLY HOW YOU FEEL!!!!! run before she starts telling you how shes the decendant of some witch goddess...trust me however if it somehow works out for the best good luck...seriously
connman2 8
Please, no joke i really wanna hear the rest of that story it sounds so weird i gotta hear it(read. whatever.)