Miscellaneous: Today, I woke up at my crazy ex-girlfriend's house, naked and...

By drugged_on_arrival - 10/09/2009 10:55 - Virgin Islands British

Today, I woke up at my crazy ex-girlfriend's house, naked and disoriented. You know, the kind of crazy like we-didn't-break-up-it-was-just-a-fight-now-we-can-get-married crazy. She says everything's fine now and she's so glad we've "started our family." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 215

You deserved it 16 832

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Same thing different taste

By Lifetime Presents: - 06/07/2016 11:50 - United States - Southfield

Today, I found out my fiancé is already married. His "crazy ex-wife" is not all that crazy, and is still his wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 606

You deserved it 1 010

By Anonymous - 08/06/2019 16:00

Today, I found our that my crazy ex, who, after our break up, said to me, "I'm setting my life to make yours hell" has befriended my current girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 058

You deserved it 153

Set the scene

By NJ. - 24/01/2009 10:41 - United States

Today, I went to work things out with my girlfriend, with whom I'd had a huge fight with. She told me the night before to come over at noon and that she would be awake. I unlocked the door to see that the place was a mess. She'd thrown a party and was still passed out naked next to her boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 217

You deserved it 2 441

By oh - 23/02/2016 02:41 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my ex-girlfriend woke up from a coma that lasted a few months. Her parents called me from the hospital shortly after because she was in hysterics that I wasn't there. Apparently she thinks we're still together, and I now have to somehow break up with her again after almost a year apart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 553

You deserved it 2 097

By geniusdrunk - 09/08/2019 02:00

Today, after a month of sobriety, I woke up in my ex-girlfriend's house with absolutely no recollection as to how I got there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 405

You deserved it 703

By Matt - 13/07/2012 19:06 - United States

Today, I woke up in a daze after a long night drinking. I felt a subtle nudge on my shoulder. I was at my ex-girlfriend's house, passed out on top of her, with no pants on. Her dad was, in so many words, informing me that I had to leave immediately. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 344

You deserved it 57 790

By effyou - 10/02/2011 05:16 - United States

Today, my best friend decided to start dating my ex. We broke up yesterday. She also thinks I'm crazy because I'm upset about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 376

You deserved it 4 217

By Anonymous - 28/12/2011 05:26 - United States

Today, my girlfriend woke up in the middle of the night, crying. When I asked her why, she said that she had a dream where we were getting married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 738

You deserved it 3 594

Wait, what?

By Anonymous - 09/03/2022 22:00

Today, I woke up in a pool of what felt like sweat and tears. Little did I realize, my then-girlfriend had snuck into the house and drenched me in salty water to get me back for kissing her sister. I guess we're even now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 188

You deserved it 1 810

Mommy dearest

By Ohkourt - 20/04/2020 05:00

Today, I woke up only to find my half-naked drunk mother in my living room, talking in her sleep about how much she hates me. She still doesn't see what's wrong with this picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 653

You deserved it 110

Anon17564 3

Thursday 10 September 2009 20:07

I think being drugged and raped is a bit too much for just FML... Go to the ******* police.

Zwische 13

Thursday 10 September 2009 20:06

....the ****?

Comments

fluffyhead0098 0

Thursday 21 January 2010 1:36

Wow, if this is a real, that sucks so bad. o__O

Americunt 0

Saturday 6 February 2010 15:51

Ew, someone needs help.

aidenkush 0

Saturday 27 February 2010 8:52

holy damn that sucks!

pottie69 0

Friday 12 March 2010 22:36

charge her with rape

brianjman14 22

Tuesday 25 May 2010 20:26

for this fml, I actually feel really really bad for. fyl, hopefully u get her outta ur life soon

clecavs23 0

Sunday 13 June 2010 19:40

dude book a flight to america

88sforlife 0

Wednesday 6 October 2010 4:03

I Think Being Drugged And Raped Is A Little To Much For An Fml

angel55033 12

Monday 25 October 2010 7:05

what'd she drug you or something? lol

JiffyMix88 8

Friday 12 November 2010 12:00

Oh that kinda crazy...... Ouch!

jazzylove22171 0

Tuesday 28 December 2010 18:27

uhmmmmm wow yea FYL indeed gettin raped aint no joke i saii get off FML and get on the phone with 911

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Management Work Miscellaneous Friends Awkward Relatable Health Healthy Lifestyle Birthday Family Money Mother in law Gifts Public freakouts Education Parents Students Exams Pranks Weird Love Argument AITA Insects Fear Cats Skincare Job interview Jealousy Coworkers

The Top

Today, while fighting unemployment and an visible abscess on my neck, I was cajoled into attending my Mom's birthday party. I spent the entire time at the restaurant trying to hide an oozing sore with a bandage, eating partially edible food. The cost? $40 I can't afford to spend on food not worth $5. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377

You deserved it 95

Today, I was rudely stopped in the park by a woman screaming at me for being a slut for having a baby so young. She got so worked up that she started swearing. Not only was I just babysitting for a friend, I am unable to get the toddler to stop swearing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 967

You deserved it 3 122

The Top

Today, I realized that when the pest control man said that we may see a few more bugs in the next few days, what he meant was "your kitchen will be covered in them." It's the day before Thanksgiving and I have several people invited over for the Holiday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 141

You deserved it 2 878

Today, my 4 year-old grand-daughter let her pet rabbit loose in the yard, while my 2 year-old grandson was trying to climb on a chair, then a table. I had to choose between catching the rabbit before it ran under the fence, or saving my grandson from falling on the concrete terrace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 367

You deserved it 1 326

Today, out of my mom, dad, and my siblings, I was the only one selected for a “random” extra check at the airport. My parents are English and my siblings were adopted from France and Scotland, and are all white. My bio parents were Pakistani, and I'm nutbrown and I was the only “random” search. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 322

You deserved it 187

Today, I found out that my husband has more topless pictures of his ex on his computer than he does of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 470

You deserved it 4 484

Today, instead of having until the end of June to find another apartment because my landlord is selling the place, I was told that the buyer paid cash and I now have 10 days to get out. I'm a flight attendant and will be out of town for 8 of those days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 918

You deserved it 225

Today a big-ass hawk swooped down and carried off my daughter’s dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 123

You deserved it 127

Same thing different taste

Set the scene

Wait, what?

Mommy dearest

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