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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I had dinner for the first time with my boyfriend's parents. It was awkward enough without his mom asking, "So, what do you do for fun, besides my son?" FML

#21173084
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45614) - you deserved it (5452)

On 06/13/2014 at 5:27am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after having asked me out on Monday, the guy I like angrily cancelled our date because I "hadn't bothered" even talking to him for "several days". One day. You didn't hear from me on Monday. It's now Tuesday. That's one day, dick. FML

#21169704
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45856) - you deserved it (6150)

On 06/10/2014 at 2:29pm - love - by fartbucket51995129565 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I sent my girlfriend a request to confirm our relationship on Facebook. She accepted, then changed her screen name into "His Hand". FML

#21169063
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50457) - you deserved it (10889)

On 06/10/2014 at 12:02am - love - by MiserableMan (man) - Vietnam (Ho Chi Minh)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend paid a guy to tell me he was dead. FML

#21169011
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48415) - you deserved it (5696)

On 06/09/2014 at 11:30pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I ran into my girlfriend by chance while out shopping. She looked different than usual. Maybe it was the wedding ring she was wearing, or how she had her arm around another gentleman, gee, I don't know. That's two years of my life wasted. FML

#21168433
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62085) - you deserved it (5036)

On 06/09/2014 at 5:03pm - love - by wrecked (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend sent me a text message confessing that she's been cheating on me. Apparently she regretted telling me the truth, because when I confronted her face-to-face, she claimed her roommate had sent it as a prank. She doesn't have a roommate. FML

#21167164
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46793) - you deserved it (3922)

On 06/08/2014 at 2:01pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend shrieking at the top of his lungs. I ran into the dining room where he was, to find him standing on the table screaming "Kill it!" while pointing at an unmoving spider the size of a Tic Tac on the wall. FML

#21167015
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43642) - you deserved it (6254)

On 06/08/2014 at 11:10am - love - by eightleggedtictac - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a guy I had been casually seeing asked me to dinner. Thinking he could be wanting to make things serious, I got all dressed up. Turns out he got a girlfriend and just wanted to tell me in person to avoid things being awkward. We then waited in silence for our meal. FML

Today, I went on a date with a guy I've had a crush on for ages. Midway through the meal, he sighed and said, "I'll be honest, this is a horrible date. You got zero personality and I'm too lazy to do a window escape, so..." He then got up and walked out. FML

#21165255
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55004) - you deserved it (9078)

On 06/06/2014 at 6:44pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was having lunch with my fiancé's family. After he excused himself to use the bathroom, his grandmother glared at me, sneered, "I never liked you" and kept eating while the others smirked. When my fiancé returned, everyone pretended nothing had happened. FML

#21164912
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53565) - you deserved it (7860)

On 06/06/2014 at 11:45am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, my mother-in-law confessed that for the longest time, she had fantasies about killing me for "ruining" her daughter's life, basically because I'm not wealthy enough for my mother-in-law's standards. She made sure to let me know the situation hasn't changed at all. FML

#21162663
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42261) - you deserved it (3499)

On 06/04/2014 at 10:34am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, my grandmother tried to start a fist-fight with my wife during my wedding ceremony. FML

#21160529
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49774) - you deserved it (4117)

On 06/02/2014 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got married. My father saw this as a good time to give some solemn, heartfelt advice to my new husband: "That ring gets real heavy fast." I was standing right there. So was my mother. FML

#21160325
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41562) - you deserved it (4234)

On 06/02/2014 at 10:00am - love - by CorCelesti (woman) - United States



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