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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, my girlfriend told me that once you love somebody you can never truly fall "out of love" with them. She wasn't talking about me, she was talking about her ex. FML

#21435838
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24985) - you deserved it (1765)

On 07/03/2015 at 11:52am - love - by worriedman - United States (Illinois)

Today, a guest at the hotel I work at started shouting at me. Apparently the street vendor selling sunglasses outside the hotel sold her a pair of 'genuine' Ray Bans for $5. She wanted me to phone the police because she realized two days later they were fake. FML

#21435445
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23142) - you deserved it (1428)

On 07/02/2015 at 4:25pm - love - by soo -

Today, I sent the girl I like flowers, only to have her later post a picture of them online, saying, "ha when losers send you flowers". FML

#21435086
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31025) - you deserved it (2324)

On 07/01/2015 at 10:04pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, the only reason my husband agreed to marriage counselling is because he finds our therapist attractive. FML

#21434782
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28231) - you deserved it (2559)

On 07/01/2015 at 9:35am - love - by ouch - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at my best friend's wedding. As she threw the bouquet, I was punched in the face by another bridesmaid. Later, as I was explaining what had happened, I punched myself in the face. FML

#21434280
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22332) - you deserved it (6687)

On 06/30/2015 at 8:56am - love - by Anonymous - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, the man that I have a crush on finally touched me. This would have been great, if not for the fact that it was to roll me on my side while I was having a seizure. FML

#21434226
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25953) - you deserved it (1696)

On 06/30/2015 at 3:51am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my fiancé heard I was having a rotten day at work. He stopped by the flower shop and bought me a lovely rose which I put right next to my work station. That is until a giant wasp flew out and stung me. I still have a swollen arm hours later. FML

#21433819
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25289) - you deserved it (1972)

On 06/29/2015 at 1:30pm - love - by rinakitty94 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, after not being able to sleep for two hours because my boyfriend wouldn't stop talking, he fell asleep and I was left wide awake. I listened to him snore for another three hours and only got a couple of hours sleep. He's not working today, but I am. FML

#21433696
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24554) - you deserved it (2876)

On 06/29/2015 at 5:28am - love - by sleepingonmydesk (woman) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I decided to break up with my boyfriend. The main reason being that he doesn't value my time, and fails to see how canceling at the last minute is rude and a major inconvenience. I wanted to be respectful enough by breaking things off face to face. He cancelled, at the last minute. FML

#21433097
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25393) - you deserved it (2083)

On 06/28/2015 at 1:06am - love - by Waste Someone Else's Time - United States

Today, my boyfriend called me while I was at work. He sounded very excited and told me he had a surprise for me. He doesn't usually do this kind of thing, so I was excited. When I came home, I found him naked, with "Bone Appetite" written right above his penis. FML

#21432853
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26006) - you deserved it (3364)

On 06/27/2015 at 2:37pm - love - by stillhungry - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend came back from her mission trip with hickies all over her boobs. She said it wasn't cheating because she was doing God's work and that they canceled each other out. FML

#21432849
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31318) - you deserved it (2573)

On 06/27/2015 at 2:29pm - love - by isaidfuckoff (woman) - United States

Today, after finally spending the night with my longtime crush, it's as if I can still feel her fingers caressing my hair. But wait, no, that's just the head lice she gave me. FML

#21432396
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26900) - you deserved it (2748)

On 06/26/2015 at 4:08pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was informed, after being broken up with, that my girlfriend's father only set her up with me so that she would have more motivation to shower on a regular basis. He actually yelled at me for being broken up with. FML

#21431508
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24041) - you deserved it (1785)

On 06/24/2015 at 11:54pm - love - by Anonymouss (man) - United States



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