Today, the police arrived at my door, telling me my child had been caught vandalizing. A boy who looked about 15 hugged me and said, "Hey, mum". I'm only 26 years old and had never seen this boy in my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31440) - you deserved it (1963)
On 01/22/2013 at 6:16pm - kids - by Female (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I caught my 4 year old son yet again trying to drink out of the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24866) - you deserved it (3615)
On 01/22/2013 at 6:39am - kids - by dani0810 - Canada (Ontario)
Today, a four-year-old said a word that I didn't know the meaning of. I had to look up the definition. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12355) - you deserved it (28289)
On 01/17/2013 at 9:31pm - kids - by walkingdictionary - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my teenage son taught my five-year-old daughter how to fake her own death. I walked into the kitchen today to find her lying still on the floor, covered in ketchup. She laughed when I began to scream. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34695) - you deserved it (3777)
Today, I was babysitting, and a little girl asked for help with her homework. I cheerfully began an explanation, only to freeze mid-sentence. I could not for the life of me remember how to do long-division. I'm about to graduate from Cornell University, and her little brother had to correct me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23298) - you deserved it (6685)
On 01/14/2013 at 9:52pm - kids - by IvyLeague? - United States (New York)
Today, after hours of trying to put a screaming baby to sleep, she finally fell asleep in my arms. I was so happy. Then, I got the hiccups. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23083) - you deserved it (1424)
On 01/13/2013 at 1:15am - kids - by hiccups - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my wife brought my 5-year-old daughter to visit me at the office. My boss has a speech impediment, and when she heard it, she exclaimed, "Hey my daddy can sound just like you! Show him daddy! Show him!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (15961) - you deserved it (28350)
On 01/12/2013 at 3:14am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out that my son told my daughter at some point that "real" name for Hershey's Kisses is "blowjobs." I found this out because at kindergarten she was asked what her favorite food was. The teacher wasn't happy when she called me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24384) - you deserved it (1626)
On 01/10/2013 at 7:51pm - kids - by Grant - United States
Today, my 14-year-old son showed me a "bird's egg" he was looking after in his room. It was a dried up dog turd. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21909) - you deserved it (6545)
On 01/10/2013 at 1:28am - kids - by Facepalmum (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my son got his first tooth, and is enthusiastically biting everything. I breastfeed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26915) - you deserved it (4572)
On 01/09/2013 at 1:48pm - kids - by loveyouson (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)
Today, my daughter learned a new song. This would be great, except for the lisp her teacher has. I now have a child screaming about the "itchy bitchy spider" at the top of her lungs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27366) - you deserved it (1754)
On 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm - kids - by ugh (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my son volunteered to help me cut out coupons. When I got to the register at the store, I noticed he'd cut off all the barcodes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18242) - you deserved it (6465)
On 01/07/2013 at 4:27pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my son sprayed Axe body-spray all over the house in the vain hope of covering up the scent of the joints he'd been smoking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21337) - you deserved it (3352)
On 01/07/2013 at 3:01pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Monday 20 May 2013
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