Today, I was slapped by a fourteen-year-old girl because I was apparently "stealing her boyfriend." I'm twenty-five, and her boyfriend is my nephew. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22328) - you deserved it (1135)
On 10/03/2012 at 8:45pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was babysitting a six year old girl, when I saw a huge spider on the wall. I screamed and told her to stay back. Instead, she walked up to the spider, squished it, and told me to stop being such a baby. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7046) - you deserved it (16901)
On 09/30/2012 at 1:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)
Today, I found out why my teenage daughter won't brush her teeth properly. Apparently my son convinced her that toothpaste has tons of calories. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16858) - you deserved it (1539)
On 09/28/2012 at 10:25am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I asked my husband to watch our daughter while I ran a few errands. While he treated himself to a long nap, she decided our fish needed a bubble bath, and squeezed out an entire bottle of dish soap. I came home to bubbles all over the floor, five dead fish, and one sleeping husband. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17096) - you deserved it (1737)
On 09/25/2012 at 6:35pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I was waiting for my wife in a mall when some kids came and sat near me, wearing band t-shirts. I recognized some, as I was into The Smiths and Black Flag in my youth. I tried to strike up a music-fan chat with them. "Fuck off, grandad" and "Ew, pedo" is all I got in return. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17077) - you deserved it (2868)
On 09/25/2012 at 7:54am - kids - by HenryRollinsForPresident (man) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I fell asleep at work and woke up with penis sharpied on my face. I'm a kindergarten teacher. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11146) - you deserved it (19316)
On 09/24/2012 at 9:51pm - kids - by Fingkids - United States
Today, I bought my nephew some giant green Incredible Hulk fists for his birthday. He thanked me by Hulk-smashing me in the nuts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13984) - you deserved it (4133)
On 09/24/2012 at 10:33am - kids - by smashed (man) - United States
Today, I came home to find my eight-year-old son had basically set fire to the kitchen, after trying to practice some kind of stupid shit he'd seen on TV called "fire bending." FML
I agree, your life sucks (14754) - you deserved it (6465)
On 09/22/2012 at 2:11pm - kids - by SadDad (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my five-year-old told me she had accidentally swallowed a thumbtack. In panic mode we raced to the ER. With no insurance. Only after the tests, examinations and X-rays did she tell me was "just joking." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22653) - you deserved it (2451)
On 09/21/2012 at 12:51am - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was having a race with a little kid. I let him win to make him feel like a champion. After the race, he turned to me and said, "Maybe if you weren't so fat you would have won." FML
I agree, your life sucks (16293) - you deserved it (2696)
On 09/20/2012 at 10:40pm - kids - by tiredeolfatty (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I was made aware that my teenage son used "Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter" as a reference point in a class debate as if it was a biopic. Oh dear. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11948) - you deserved it (264)
On 09/20/2012 at 10:58am - kids - by Hmmmm (man) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I was called into my 17-year-old son's high school. Why? Because it was Wednesday, also known as "Hump Day" and his friends managed to convince him that you're supposed to go around and hump people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15260) - you deserved it (1633)
On 09/19/2012 at 7:33pm - kids - by Judy - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I found a Justin Bieber shrine in my daughter's closet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21065) - you deserved it (2185)
On 09/18/2012 at 3:51pm - kids - by unfortunateMother (woman) - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)
Friday 24 May 2013
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