Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I was instructed to shave my back in preperation for my first tattoo. I'm a girl. FML

#4730370
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34659) - you deserved it (10871)

On 08/22/2009 at 5:07am - health - by Buggga (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went to the doctor to inquire about the rash I've been getting in my underarms, behind my knees and sometimes on my face. Turns out I'm allergic to sweat. I'm a varsity rugby coach, gym teacher, and I just shelled out a stack of cash to get a sauna and steam room installed in my house. FML

#4712230
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41082) - you deserved it (3726)

On 08/21/2009 at 4:17pm - health - by FilthyIke (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was on the elevator going up to a meeting, and the elevator was getting more and more crowded as we went up. After about ten people got on, they all agreed that I should get off the elevator because they thought me being on was exceeding the weight limit. FML

#4703567
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34393) - you deserved it (6651)

On 08/21/2009 at 5:27am - health - by tryingatkins (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I decided I need help, so I confessed to my mother that I'm bulimic. After she looked it up online she started screaming at me for "Wasting food that I'm not paying for." FML

#4663591
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47513) - you deserved it (10123)

On 08/19/2009 at 7:43pm - health - by Rainbow92 (woman) - Bulgaria (Grad Sofiya)

Today, I re-dislocated my arm trying to get it out of the cast it was in because I didn't want to pay the $50 dollar fee to get it taken off. FML

#4660097
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8676) - you deserved it (86535)

On 08/19/2009 at 5:02pm - health - by flaps (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was told I have bipolar disorder. I'm 31. It took so long to diagnose because my mom always figured I was "just a super bitch half the time." FML

#4654835
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41151) - you deserved it (4566)

On 08/19/2009 at 12:40pm - health - by crazychick (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my nose was itchy. As I reached towards it to itch it, I sneezed ridiculously hard. I punched myself in the eye and now it's all purple and puffy. FML

#4623862
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40268) - you deserved it (9028)

On 08/18/2009 at 7:47am - health - by Ahhwtf (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out that I'm immune to laughing gas and partially immune to novocaine while I was getting two teeth pulled. FML

#4609790
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49595) - you deserved it (2524)

On 08/17/2009 at 8:14pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got a paper cut while opening my box of Band-Aids. FML

#4566458
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49032) - you deserved it (8663)

On 08/16/2009 at 3:05am - health - by irony (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that I puke and then pass out at the sight of blood. I am a 16 year old girl expecting hundreds of periods to come. FML

#4554817
345 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51878) - you deserved it (6899)

On 08/15/2009 at 7:06pm - health - by hellnooo (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my sister and I were reading the new FML posts. I sat close to the fan, and after a few minutes, I leaned against it for support. It immediatly sucked up my hair and started violently twisting it. My sister continued to read and shouted at me because my cries for help are distracting. FML

#4550726
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45829) - you deserved it (12638)

On 08/15/2009 at 3:21pm - health - by baldintheback (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was very sick and kept throwing up. I took a shower after every time I threw up. While in the shower after I threw up, I had to throw up again, so I got out and ran to the toilet. I slipped on the tile, broke my nose on the floor, and then threw up. FML

#4543723
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51564) - you deserved it (9798)

On 08/15/2009 at 3:51am - health - by Ouch (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I decided to be safe and tested a small dime-sized amount of Nair on my inner arm before using it. I didn't react badly. But as soon as it was washed off from my down-there hair I sure as hell reacted, with small bumpy red dots that look like an STD. FML

#4540987
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33228) - you deserved it (12375)

On 08/15/2009 at 1:22am - health - by Dammit (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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