Money: Today, my dad told me he has money set aside for when he has...

By Anonymous - 12/06/2011 19:21 - United States

Today, my dad told me he has money set aside for when he has to bail me out of jail because "it's bound to happen sooner or later." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 644

You deserved it 10 750

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Same thing different taste

By No one special. - 12/12/2010 05:28 - United States

Today, my dad called for the first time in six months. He needs someone to bail him out of jail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 491

You deserved it 2 429

By fox_at_heart - 30/09/2016 02:21 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, I found out my father has been saving money to help me buy my first car. In the same conversation, I found out my mother, unbeknownst to my dad, used nearly all of the money to bail my drunken, deadbeat uncle out of jail for the fourth time a month ago. He's now back in prison. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 899

You deserved it 777

By Username - 23/06/2011 08:17 - United States

Today, I found out that my dad has been trying to take money out of my savings account to pay for divorce fees and a hammock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 361

You deserved it 2 587

By that was mine - 15/05/2015 22:26 - United States - Cherry Hill

Today, my mom cleaned out my bank account, saying my "no-good dad" owes her child support and that she'll get it one way or another. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 886

You deserved it 2 332

By MadSon - 11/10/2009 02:59 - United States

Today, my dad had something to tell me. He'd cleaned out my bank account to pay off 38,000 dollars worth of gambling debt. My wedding is in 5 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 025

You deserved it 4 105

By needofmoney - 18/02/2011 02:16 - United States

Today, I finally told my dad that he owes me over 400 dollars, and that I need it or else I'd get kicked out of my apartment. He only gave me 70 and said to get a better job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 659

You deserved it 5 083

Free money for me, but not for thee

By Anonymous - 04/08/2020 14:01

Today, my dad refuses to let me inherit all of his money, which might just put a roof over my head when I’m older. *His* money? Well, actually, he inherited it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 222

You deserved it 909

By chiktikka - 14/01/2014 22:06 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad asked me to lend him some money to buy his medication, since he's all but broke right now. He returned with nothing but a bottle of tequila. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 119

You deserved it 8 404

By FATS DOMINO - 20/10/2011 15:39 - United States

Today, my sister finally broke down and told me that our dad gambled away of all my college savings, and I would have to pay for school the best way I can. They have known for months, and when I asked why nobody told me, the reply was, "You're a college boy, we thought you would figure it out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 603

You deserved it 2 448

By nodad - 11/10/2011 04:52 - United States

Today, I found out my dad stole money from me when he was arrested for buying Oxycodone from an undercover cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 030

You deserved it 2 340

melissamoshh 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 23:27

How thoughtful

whiskuit 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 23:34

Now there's something you can't call a... *puts on sunglasses* ...trust fund. YEEEEAAAAAHHHHHHH

Comments

Siji 0

Monday 13 June 2011 1:20

Do combo breakers apply to annoying conversations? Cause I'll gladly throw one in. ;)

luvppl 6

Monday 13 June 2011 1:21

ah, well, I don't wish to take sides, but I was just wondering...

luvppl 6

Monday 13 June 2011 1:22

ahahaha 118, perhaps that will lighten the mood :) I will openly welcome a combo breaker... :)

almedalove 0

Monday 13 June 2011 1:26

well you know someone loves you! he dies plan to get you out !

CallMeHush 0

Monday 13 June 2011 1:28

Your dad thinks you are either a badass or a screw-up!

annihil8or 15

Monday 13 June 2011 1:30

If i had a kid in jail id get em out but only with there money

SmexiLexii 3

Monday 13 June 2011 1:33

How thoughtful of him

baseball4life915 0

Monday 13 June 2011 4:44

where can I message you?

MissRoxiie 12

Monday 13 June 2011 1:35

wow he doesnt believe in you, thats sad =

awmy 2

Monday 13 June 2011 1:36

lol thats a sign dude...

MAXCAT1220 0

Monday 13 June 2011 1:39

hey it's true

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were in our room getting hot and heavy. As he was entering me, he started making electronic whirring sounds. Once inside, he said in a robotic voice, "Initiating launch sequence in 3... 2... 1..." and began thrusting as fast as possible. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 698

You deserved it 9 549

Today, the bank called to ask when were we going to make the mortgage payments for our family home. We were several months late. I had been transferring my mother the cash to make the mortgage payments after she lost her money gambling. She absolutely promised she would stop several months ago. I guess she lied. FML

I agree, your life sucks 620

You deserved it 1 623

The Top

Today, it was my first time having sex with this guy. After a few second he stops, sits in the corner of his room buff-naked, with his knees up and his hands on his face. He then pouts and claims it was his worst performance ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 007

You deserved it 4 220

Today, I realized nobody has ever asked me for nudes, slid into my DMs, sent me anything lewd, or commented on any of my photos. I guess I'm that unattractive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 646

You deserved it 415

Today, I met my best friend's girlfriend for the first time. After a few hours of talking and eating, she followed me to the bathroom and said, dead serious, ''If you ever touch him or get too close to him, I will cut you''. I've known him for twelve years, they have been dating for a month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 926

You deserved it 3 302

Today, while working at a children's day camp, one of the kids who is allergic to peanuts went into anaphylactic shock. I ran and grabbed the boy's Epipen. I was holding it backwards so the injection went into my hand, causing me to pass out, and both of us to be rushed to hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 629

You deserved it 56 829

Today, my mom got angry that I moved stuff in the freezer, and banned me from even opening it in future. I’m in my 30s, I fought in Iraq and Afghanistan, and now I've lost freezer privileges. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 183

You deserved it 207

Today, I'm in a US college. I could've gone into a trade or internship, but no one listened. Now, while my parents brag to their friends that their child has a degree, I'll probably be spending the rest of life in crippling debt, sleeping on the side of the road, and begging strangers for table scraps. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 228

You deserved it 472

Same thing different taste

Free money for me, but not for thee

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