By cheezmaster - 16/12/2009 23:55 - United States

Today, after many, many attempts to get her out of my life, the girl that is stalking me told me that she loves me and our love can only be ended by her killing either herself or me. FML
I agree, your life sucks 46 823
You deserved it 2 566
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

Luckster 0

Run...Police NEVER help in cases like these. Just ******* RUN!

128 4

Comments

MrCanoe 5

there's 2 options 1. Go to the police. report this, get a restraining order 2. Give in and have sex with her but create some extremely freaky sex thing like Shit/piss play, extreme S&M stuff or dress up like a baby just Do something really really freaky and she will be turned off hopefully

0 0
FerrariCake 2

It sounds like she's giving you a choice... tell her you choose that she kills herself, not you.

0 0
CallMeHush 0

So that is what true love is like. Take her on a weekend trip to Mexico, book your return flight a day earlier, bang her silly all weekend then sneak off with her ticket and passport. Problem Solved! (and you got laid)

2 0
Ejigantor 0

pro tip: midway through the romp start getting kinky- on the last day you're there, tie her to the bed, blindfold her, bang her one more time, and leave.

1 0
I_am_stupid_also 6

Read all the other FMLs for hints of crappy things to say to her.

0 0
FML_FYL_2009 0

AHHHH! You need to slap a restraining order and a straight jacket on the ho. Also, to #75, I think you are on the wrong website. This is the one you were looking for: http://www.mylifeistwilight.com

0 0
the_sodomizer 0

buy her a weapon

0 0
Roshoka 0

then stuff the weapon with dirt or mud if its a gun so it'll blow her hand off

0 0