Misunderstanding

By vanessa_d15 - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, I was together with a few of my friends when I got up the courage to confess I have an eating disorder. One of my friends then said "... but you're not skinny." FML
I agree, your life sucks 43 108
You deserved it 6 735

Same thing different taste

Top comments

That's when you say to her, "and you're not intelligent."

...your friend sounds like a lovely person.

Comments

lololol111 0

you deserve it. you fail at having a ******* eating disorder.

IdfkMyUsernamexC 5

You fail at knowing about all "the ******* eating disorders".

You could be obese and still be anorexic just because you act like one. Anorexia shouldn't be treated only when the person who suffers from it becomes to skinny to look human and be healthy because that means it's "too late". OP, I really hope you'll find support. I've suffered from many eating disorder and I know it's hard to fight against them when noone realizes.

letitbe56 0

Technically, be clinically diagnosed with anorexia, you need to be 15% underweight or more (DSM criteria). However, you're right--if someone who is obese or overweight is starving themselves or exercising too much, they need treatment just as badly as someone who meets the diagnostic criteria.

lem0n_fml 0

Isn't there a difference between anorexia and anorexia nervosa though? Yes, you have to be 15% underweight to have anorexia, but anorexia nervosa is the psychological aspect of it, which you can have regardless of your actual body weight.

hey dumbass, ever heard of BMI? That's the normal weight for an individual. Dumbass....

letitbe56 0

Lem0n-You're right about the nomenclature but wrong about your interpretation of the distinction. "Anorexic" simply means "not eating." Someone fasting for religious purposes could be termed "anorexic." Anorexia nervosa is the clinical disorder, and the DSM criteria include being clinically underweight, having a fear of gaining weight, having a distorted body image, an amenorrhea (lack of menstrual period in a sexually mature woman). Mj- While a BMI is actually a pretty good measure of how healthy one's weight is, you're right, some healthy people will fall either below or above the parameters. (I myself am technically "underweight," but I'm perfectly healthy with normal eating habits, so believe me, I understand.) No one is going to be diagnosed just by their weight alone--they have to meet the other criteria as well. People with some eating disorder symptoms who don't meet all the DSM criteria are said to have a partial-syndrome eating disorder, or an eating disorder not-otherwise-specified (EDNOS), and they are included in the DSM as such. While certain insurance companies won't pay for the treatment of these disorders (because health care in our country sucks...not too surprising), the psychological community takes all kinds of disordered eating very seriously, particularly since if you catch a disorder before it becomes critical, it's much easier to treat.

In my country, anorexia (the eating disorder of course) can be diagnosed before you are underweight (or at least, I know someone who had been diagnosed before being underweight). But people generally don't do anything because "anorexic have to be deadly skinny" so those who suffers from it are rarely diagnosed or considered as "attention *****" though they do have a problem. Many death could be avoided if people believed those who realize they have a problem before they go too far.

Some people on here are disgusting excuses for human beings. When someone admits to an eating disorder, you don't make a comment about their weight. Why do you think they have that disorder in the first place (in most cases)? Right. Because they're insecure about their size. Whether or not she's thin, that isn't the point. Saying something like that is only going to trigger them further, which is not something that a friend is supposed to do. One of my best friends has been dealing with an eating disorder for the past few years now. She gets better, and then she relapses. Comments like this would definitely trigger her. And I agree with Psychs. You need a support system in order to get better. You need friends who will hold you accountable and make sure you're not destroying yourself. If you're a true friend, you'll deal with the "burden." OP, I hope you get better soon. Find some friends that will support you through this, go seek professional help, etc.

Failing at an eating disorder, double whammy.

Okay, maybe her friend was just being mean? Dude, you dont know what her friend's idea of what 'skinny' is. Anyways, if you read anything above, you would realize that a eating disorder doesnt mean your a super skinny anerexic chick. It just means you eat at an unhealthy pattern. Ya'll need to stop being so freaking mean. I bet $10 she isnt even fat, she just is having problems at the moment. Hon, your friends are just being rude about it. they probably thought you had to be 75 lbs to have an eating disorder. Dont let them bother you.

I would bet you $20 that the OP is fat. The problems she has at the moment are: her fat, her love handles, and that bucket of butter. @OP You're an idiot if you believe that an eating disorder could be the way to get skinny. Bulimics tend to gain some weight, and anorexics can sometimes become bulimic or end up binge-eating. Maybe, before you underwent such a major decision to change your body, you should have put in some research. Sure, they have a warped image, but why treat it by eating like a fool? How about you get off your ass and exercise?

yes, may I please have some jam on my cocktoast?

You're quite stupid you know. Some people actually BECOME fat BECAUSE of their eating disorder, especially bulemics or people who alternate between anorexia and bulemia (because their body stock fat quickly to prevent the next anorexic phase). And having an eating disorder is not a choice !

TinyBard 0

I'm so sorry about everyone posting, and your stupid friends who should go die. I went through the same thing when I told my 'best friend', she said "Well, you know, you're still kinda... Big." And I wanted to kill her, saying things like that only makes it worse. You don't even feel good enough to have an ED, it's sad. But I'm sure, OP, that you are beautiful and wonderful and you deserve better than all this. I wish you all the best and I hope you get the support and help that you need. It was strong of you to tell them in the first place. I'm hoping the best for you, stay strong.

dsd_fml 2

that really sucks. btw anorexia is a mental problem as well, not just a physical one, as well as bulimia. you deserve better friends when i tell some people they just say im not that skinny and i know how much that hurts. you dont need to be 10 lb to have an eating disorder! bethechange is right!