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Man or woman?

Today, despite years of paranoid checking, I forgot to check my towel for spiders after my shower. Two crawled onto me, and I'm pretty sure there's one somewhere in my hair. FML

#21161379
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39948) - you deserved it (4921)

On 06/03/2014 at 4:56am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, while laying on the couch my cat came and laid on me. Turns out my ass is big enough for my 13 year old cat to walk around in circles, wash itself, stretch and sleep. FML

#21159082
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33749) - you deserved it (8528)

On 06/01/2014 at 6:28am - animals - by Fat Arsed Lass - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was hit in the face by the placenta of a cow that had just given birth. FML

#21158688
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46047) - you deserved it (5117)

On 05/31/2014 at 9:53pm - animals - by disturbed - Ireland

Today, my psycho, animal-hating neighbour "accidentally" ran over my cat. This is the second time he's "accidentally" done this to a neighbourhood pet since he moved in, three weeks ago. FML

#21157136
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45647) - you deserved it (3403)

On 05/30/2014 at 1:28pm - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I saw a pair of eyes looking at me from my closet. Realizing it must be my cat, I called her. She immediately came out from under my bed. I can't find anything in my closet. FML

#21155508
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58896) - you deserved it (4556)

On 05/29/2014 at 2:46am - animals - by Idk (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, at work I had to explain to a client that male dogs can wear red collars and it doesn't make them "gay". The client then got angry and stormed out of the store, causing me to get written up. FML

#21153154
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41954) - you deserved it (4389)

On 05/27/2014 at 7:15am - animals - by Holyguacamoly (woman) - Iceland

Today, my wife's cat ran away. After spending a lot of money making "Lost Cat" flyers and driving around for hours passing them out and searching for her cat, he walked downstairs. FML

Today, my cat decided to hide in the garbage can so he could get a free trip outside, but was too fat to climb all of the way inside of it. He got stuck half-way in. It took me ten minutes to get him out. FML

Today, I'm moving. While packing, I realized I hadn't seen my cat in a few hours. I called her and realized she was inside one of the hundreds of boxes in my house. I accidentally packed my cat. FML

#21139824
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41026) - you deserved it (15309)

On 05/14/2014 at 4:43pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)

Today, while driving out to the countryside with my new boyfriend, we came across a deer lying in the road. It seemed badly hurt, but instead of letting me get out and make sure, my boyfriend decided to just run over its head to finish it off, then continued driving with a smirk on his face. FML

#21138836
394 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53001) - you deserved it (8384)

On 05/13/2014 at 5:02pm - animals - by dating a big bag of dicks (woman) - United States

Today, my mom invited me over yet again so I could practice my culinary degree by making an exquisite, gourmet meal for her dog; a three year old Pomeranian who pees in my shoes. FML

#21138238
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36503) - you deserved it (4634)

On 05/12/2014 at 10:46pm - animals - by that_culinary_degree_though (woman) - United States (Washington)



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Wednesday 13 August 2014

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