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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my girlfriend came over to me, like she was going to kiss me, and instead rubbed her chin all over my face, exclaiming, "Can you feel my beard coming in?" Yes, yes I could. FML

#13570264
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40376) - you deserved it (4056)

On 10/24/2010 at 12:11am - love - by altocrm - Sent from mobile version

Today, a woman got out of a car to scream at me as I was walking with the kids I babysit, demanding to know where I was taking her children. Apparently the woman who pays me is also a babysitter, who I have been "covering" for on her party nights. The mother doesn't believe I didn't know this. FML

#13567448
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37328) - you deserved it (2632)

On 10/23/2010 at 8:52pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was sitting on a plane waiting for everyone to get on. A cute guy around my age had the option of sitting next to me or an old guy. He gave me a horrified look and immediately sat next to the old man. I got to sit next to his mother. She evil eyed me the whole time. FML

#13567439
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27655) - you deserved it (3461)

On 10/23/2010 at 8:50pm - misc - by ugly me - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was at a movie theater. I heard some obnoxious people talking in front of me. After about 5 minutes, I began throwing popcorn at a group of suspected people. As I was escorted out, I realized that the obnoxious people were in the background of the movie. FML

#13566172
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5641) - you deserved it (44705)

On 10/23/2010 at 7:14pm - misc - by escortedout (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, after constantly checking my email for a week, I finally got a letter saying that I was accepted to take a test for a job position. The only problem is I was scheduled to test today, eight hours ago. FML

#13565475
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27664) - you deserved it (3321)

On 10/23/2010 at 6:11pm - work - by level6 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my parents told me about how they met. I'd already known they were eight years apart, but I never knew my dad started dating my mom when he was 21 and she was 13. FML

#13561698
350 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55359) - you deserved it (3934)

On 10/23/2010 at 12:01pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

lexie206's comment : wow. I guess age really didn't matter to them..

See all the comments →

Today, I found out that the reason I'm working as a kitchen staff instead of out on the floor of the café is because the boss does not think I'm attractive enough. My boss is my brother. FML

#13561259
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30818) - you deserved it (3979)

On 10/23/2010 at 11:13am - work - by Dude - Singapore

Today, I got very drunk after being fired from my job. In my depressed, intoxicated state, I posted my facebook status as 'Goodbye world'. The only response was from my dad saying 'cya'. His comment got 29 likes. FML

#13560342
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43900) - you deserved it (13239)

On 10/23/2010 at 9:15am - misc - by drunkfacebookuser (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend said he wants a Hello Kitty wedding. FML

#13559273
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41004) - you deserved it (9069)

On 10/23/2010 at 5:07am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I watched a grizzled, old gas station attendant with a stain on her blouse use my driver's license to pick something out of her teeth. FML

#13559030
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34379) - you deserved it (2791)

On 10/23/2010 at 4:17am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, at Burger King, I had to go to the bathroom. Two ketchup packets were under the seat and exploded on my legs and pants when I sat down. FML

#13558964
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33021) - you deserved it (5902)

On 10/23/2010 at 4:03am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, for my Teen Living class, all the students got a fake baby. In order to stop the baby from crying, you have to use the bracelet they provide. I lost the bracelet. I have the baby all weekend. FML

#13558555
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9022) - you deserved it (38991)

On 10/23/2010 at 2:47am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I found my pet hamster that escaped yesterday, wet and soggy, next to my pet dog. My dog chewed it. FML

#13558401
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29337) - you deserved it (3752)

On 10/23/2010 at 2:22am - animals - by poorhamster - United States (Washington)



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