Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I came in to work and found the conference room white boards completely clean. My assistant wiped all the white boards where I spent 10 hours writing schedule for the next three months. I was going to meet with all supervisors to finalize that schedule today. FML

#6137753
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33474) - you deserved it (6344)

On 11/03/2009 at 4:51pm - work - by CorpDrone (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, a woman evidently posted on a chat website asking for any young men to send pictures of their junk to her cell phone. Over 60 messages were sent, mostly by underage boys, most of them including the picture. Only problem. The number posted wasn't hers... It was mine. I'm a 21 year old guy. FML

#6137228
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23974) - you deserved it (2166)

On 11/03/2009 at 4:17pm - intimacy - by buckid310 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, good news! The guitar I have been saving up for, for 5 months, finally arrived. It came inside a beautiful black and white case, and impossible to get into without the key. They didn't pack the key. FML

#6136343
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32322) - you deserved it (2478)

On 11/03/2009 at 3:08pm - misc - by RedLion23 (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, while I was driving out of the student parking lot I saw people laughing. Then the old security lady yelled for me to stop. She told me my books were on the top of my car but one had already fallen off. I looked in my rearview mirror and saw all of my school papers flying everywhere. FML

#6136061
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13675) - you deserved it (26916)

On 11/03/2009 at 2:49pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I got stopped at the bank by security for carrying a weapon and threatened to call the police. I had to prove my “metal stick” was not a weapon. I am partially paralyzed in one of my feet and have to walk with a cane. FML

#6136055
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33193) - you deserved it (1763)

On 11/03/2009 at 2:49pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was pulled over and was given a $300 ticket for going 90mph on a 70mph highway. The cop swore he saw my silver car darting in and out of traffic. A couple of minutes earlier that exact car had passed me while I was following the speed limit. FML

#6134819
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32942) - you deserved it (2121)

On 11/03/2009 at 1:00pm - misc - by wrongcar - United States (Kansas)

Today, my landlord came over while I wasn't home. My friend and her pets were thrown out by her husband. I'm the only person she knows in this state and she begged me to stay. I reluctantly told her fine; just don't answer the door. She did, with the animals, and told him she was living here. FML

#6133769
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28316) - you deserved it (5598)

On 11/03/2009 at 10:59am - misc - by katurday (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I went on a date with a man I met on Halloween. It appears that his mullet wasn't actually part of his costume. FML

#6133031
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18884) - you deserved it (6462)

On 11/03/2009 at 9:12am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, I though it would be funny to go on my boyfriend's facebook to change his status. While in the process, his account received a message. Turns out he's planning on hooking up with his ex girlfriend/one of my friends and is definitely over me. How's that for snooping around? FML

#6132995
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21982) - you deserved it (32866)

On 11/03/2009 at 9:04am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I asked my girlfriend about a diamond necklace I bought her for her birthday, which she didn't seem to be wearing. She then told me she hocked it to pay for her inexpensive phone bill. I paid $1,500 for that necklace, she received $300 from the pawn shop. FML

#6132139
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38043) - you deserved it (4193)

On 11/03/2009 at 6:02am - money - by I_Lossed (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I woke up extremely hungover next to a guy I have been in love with for a while but hadn't seen for ages. Turns out he had a bet going with his mates. He bet he could get me to sleep with him straight away even after not calling me for a month. He was right. FML

#6131702
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9067) - you deserved it (23912)

On 11/03/2009 at 4:25am - intimacy - by Lovestupid (woman) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, I was driving past men working on the side of the road. There was a lot of water pouring down the road and as I slowed down to drive through it, a car sped past me, splashing my entire car. It was only then I realized it was a septic tank leak. FML

#6131047
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26262) - you deserved it (2104)

On 11/03/2009 at 2:26am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)



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