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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, it's my birthday. My next-door neighbours gave me a stool and some rope. FML

#21194564
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54208) - you deserved it (4794) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/01/2014 at 12:55am - love - by NosChersVoisins - France (Aquitaine)

dakid87's comment : Damn I'm sorry. Happy Birthday!!!

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Today, after losing his job, I reassured my boyfriend by telling him I'd rather be with him living in a cardboard box than to be without him. He responded by telling me he'd rather be dead. FML

#21194528
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41547) - you deserved it (5126)

On 07/01/2014 at 12:26am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

StormfrontX33's comment : When he's dead, most likely he will end up in a box anyway.

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Today, I had to explain what "cashback" was to a customer. She called me a liar and wanted to talk to a manager because she felt I made up the concept. I'm the manager. She wouldn't believe me and waited in the store for an hour. Apparently this is what a Masters degree gets me. FML

#21194527
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45789) - you deserved it (3678)

On 07/01/2014 at 12:26am - work - by where do they come from - United States (Washington)

sydstoomuch's comment : Damn. Sad truth is, it can only get worse working in customer service.

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Today, I watched a Youtube video about artists who ripped off other artist's songs. All of the bands that were accused of stealing were all bands that I really enjoy. FML

#21194507
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33966) - you deserved it (9414)

On 07/01/2014 at 12:12am - misc - by dillon (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, at my grandparent's funeral, we were waiting for the pastor. He was fashionably late because he couldn't find his sunglasses and had gone to buy new ones. FML

#21194487
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38952) - you deserved it (2715)

On 06/30/2014 at 11:59pm - misc - by too cool (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I told my husband that I didn't feel like he loved me. He looked away and replied, "Fair enough". FML

#21194486
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39969) - you deserved it (4529)

On 06/30/2014 at 11:59pm - love - by mymumdidntloveme - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I smacked my kid on top of the head for spinning the display rack while I was looking at greeting cards. It wasn't until he dramatically screamed and dropped to the floor wailing that I realized he wasn't my daughter. FML

#21194154
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28046) - you deserved it (41022)

On 06/30/2014 at 7:39pm - kids - by BaWanda (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my husband came clean to having an affair with my sister. I later found out my other sister encouraged the affair because she thought they'd be a cute couple. FML

#21194001
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52637) - you deserved it (3542)

On 06/30/2014 at 5:06pm - love - by outoflove (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up loudly screaming from a "night" terror. I say "night"; I was actually at my desk at work, in the middle of the day, surrounded by dozens of co-workers in their cubicles. FML

#21193942
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34112) - you deserved it (9492)

On 06/30/2014 at 3:51pm - work - by Whoopsie (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my towel was stolen at the swimming pool. I quickly found the culprit, and to avoid a conflict, I just swiped it back when he wasn't looking. I felt pretty good about everything, until I got back home and realized it wasn't actually my towel after all. FML

#21193691
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25194) - you deserved it (37170)

On 06/30/2014 at 12:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, my daughter asked me how long she had to put her 2-minute noodles in the microwave for. FML

#21193510
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39997) - you deserved it (6544)

On 06/30/2014 at 7:40am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I sped off down the road, then realized to my horror that my cat was clinging to the roof of the car. FML

Today, I donated to a charity website. My card was repeatedly refused by the website but when I went on my account, I was charged for each time I tried. I was scammed by a charity. FML

#21193277
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49264) - you deserved it (7389)

On 06/30/2014 at 1:02am - money - by Charitable (woman) - United States (California)



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