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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, my fiancé called me 'thick' for not realising he'd been sleeping with his ex earlier. FML

#21400979
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3540) - you deserved it (248)

On 04/28/2015 at 1:23am - intimacy - by Jennandco (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, the guy I broke up with for not putting any effort into the relationship asked if he could make it up to me by taking me out to lunch. He stood me up. FML

#21400557
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17770) - you deserved it (3243)

On 04/27/2015 at 10:49am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, due to awkward circumstances, I am living with my ex-girlfriend and her new girlfriend. FML

#21400544
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17678) - you deserved it (1791)

On 04/27/2015 at 10:20am - misc - by Junkiegamer - United States (Texas)

nikkipettyfer's comment : I'd like to hear this story

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Today, I asked my class to name some West African countries. Several of them thought Ebola was a country. I teach an AP history class. FML

#21400396
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22127) - you deserved it (2255)

On 04/27/2015 at 12:58am - work - by advanced history teacher (man) - United States (Arizona)

Welshite's comment : That answer is going viral.

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Today, I went to a wine tasting for the first time. I copied the experienced people around me by swishing the wine around in my mouth, which I then choked on and spit out all over my white blouse. FML

#21400331
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18799) - you deserved it (6342)

On 04/26/2015 at 11:12pm - misc - by rookiemistake (woman) - United States (California)

fleur_de_fevrier's comment : Wearing a white shirt while wine tasting? You like to take chances :)

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Today, while with a large group of friends, my best friend started talking about my struggles with dating and intimacy. I quietly asked her to stop talking about it, as it was personal and I wasn't comfortable with everyone else knowing. Her response? "Um, it's really none of your business." FML

Today, my fiancé threatened to break up with me if our dog couldn't be the best man at our wedding. FML

#21399911
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20970) - you deserved it (3708)

On 04/26/2015 at 9:35am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I snuck downstairs to watch a midnight movie. One moment I'm trying to plug my headphones in, in the dark, and the next my dad's beating the shit out of me with a baseball bat. Turns out he snuck down after me for a midnight snack and thought I was a burglar disconnecting the TV. FML

#21399867
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25512) - you deserved it (3693)

On 04/26/2015 at 6:05am - health - by Anonymous (man) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I asked the man of my dreams out on a date. His response: "I'd rather eat my own balls." FML

#21399850
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24761) - you deserved it (2362)

On 04/26/2015 at 4:19am - love - by fuck you (woman) - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend having phone sex less than 10 feet away from me. FML

#21399833
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24658) - you deserved it (1887)

On 04/26/2015 at 3:09am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was watching porn, and ended up bawling because the girl in the video looked like my ex. FML

#21399752
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23666) - you deserved it (6961)

On 04/26/2015 at 12:05am - intimacy - by montanadinosaur (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while out walking with my son in a stroller, a couple passed by and the girl smiled sweetly at him. It made me really happy, until we passed and I heard her say "What? You're supposed to smile at babies, even if they look weird." FML

#21399622
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23642) - you deserved it (1920)

On 04/25/2015 at 6:46pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was bitten by a therapy dog. FML

#21399578
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24231) - you deserved it (2668)

On 04/25/2015 at 4:42pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



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