destraa

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Killeen, USA
42 years-old
Wednesday 03 August 1983
couple

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Destraa's favorite FMLs

By Anonymous - 30/08/2011 17:35 - Canada

Today, I tried to impress the guy I like. He breeds reptiles, and I happen to have a snake and a lizard. I went over to his house to show them off. He opened the door just as my lizard fell between my boobs. He had to help me get it out. FML

agreeclassic 26 410

vote type 1 12 882

By opinaise - 02/08/2012 13:00 - France - Toulouse

Today, my girlfriend opened my refrigerator and began her standard moan: "You're a pig, you never clean up. Look at that egg, it makes me want to throw up, it's gone black, it’s covered in fuzz, IT'S GOT HAIR ON IT!" I got up to check it out. It was a Kiwi fruit. FML

agreeclassic 558

vote type 1 52

By Anonymous - 01/08/2012 09:02 - United States

Today, I discovered that the only reason my husband is taking yoga classes with me is because he wants to be flexible enough to suck his own rod. FML

agreeclassic 39 754

vote type 1 6 605

By deli Shoppe - 27/06/2012 04:39 - United States - Vallejo

Today, I went to the bookstore and saw a stunning girl reading. I walked over and picked up a book, thinking our two books were the same category, hence a good conversation starter. She looked at me, and I pointed at my book and smiled. After that, she left. It was a sex position book. FML

agreeclassic 9 384

vote type 1 38 688

By megasniper240 - 19/06/2012 15:35 - United States - Ronkonkoma

Today, the Jehovah's Witnesses witnessed me whacking off on my couch. FML

agreeclassic 32 776

vote type 1 17 874

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megasniper240 9

Tuesday 19 June 2012 21:31

OP here, to clear it up I was on my futon in my living room and they happened to catch a glimpse through the window. Also, it was an old lady with her husband.