aportwood3

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Aportwood3's favorite FMLs

By Simon - 30/12/2008 11:14 - France

Today, as a prank I shook my girlfriend's can of soda. I hadn't noticed that it was already open. FML

agreeclassic 6 134

vote type 1 53 550

Lost

By Alicia - 21/01/2010 05:02 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have sex for the first time. Not only did he struggle for five minutes to put on a condom (repeatedly snapping himself in the balls), but he then had to ask me "which hole" to put it in. I'm dating a thirty-four year old virgin. FML

agreeclassic 32 438

vote type 1 6 370

By Crissylove10 - 18/01/2010 20:12 - United States

Today, I bought a fake "wedding ring" at Target to play a prank on my parents. They kicked me out, saying my "fiancé" can take care of me now. There is no fiancé, and I just lost my job. FML

agreeclassic 13 123

vote type 1 43 106

Bump in the road

By misshb - 18/01/2010 01:26 - United Kingdom

Today, my long term ex, who broke up with me over a year ago and shattered my heart, seduced me (which wasn't hard, as he knew I still had feelings for him) and as he pulled out after the couple of minutes of what he called sex, he used the line, "There we go, that's your freebie." FML

agreeclassic 12 272

vote type 1 22 877

By Anonymous - 10/01/2010 15:10 - Canada

Today, I propositioned my boyfriend of two years to have sex with me in the shower to spice up our love life. He said that he was really busy. He was playing Call of Duty. FML

agreeclassic 24 027

vote type 1 6 078