Elphieba

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Under Your Bed, United States
32 years-old
Sunday 27 June 1993
complicated

A propos de Elphieba

Hello I am Bethany , call me anything else and I'll cut you . I speak English, Text Language, and Yo Momma. I take after-school lessons learning the language of Retarded-Troll. ~Have a good day.

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Elphieba's favorite FMLs

By great - 20/07/2012 10:20 - New Zealand - Hamilton

Today, at the bank, my 8-year-old son decided to pull out realistic looking toy gun, and scream "FREEZE! Give me all your money!" The dim-witted bank teller pressed the silent alarm, and I was nearly arrested. FML

agreeclassic 21 553

vote type 1 31 431

By Anonymous - 19/07/2012 04:55 - United States - San Diego

Today, I had a few friends over. Wanting to seem cool, I yelled at my girlfriend to get me a beer. She chucked four bottles at my head. All my friends cheered her on. FML

agreeclassic 7 855

vote type 1 81 012

By Anonymous - 30/05/2012 18:47 - United Kingdom - Barry

Today, I had to sneak out of work to get my daughter from her school. Apparently, she had thought that hurling a bowling ball down the stairs during the lunch hour rush would make her cool. In actual fact, it made her expelled. FML

agreeclassic 27 951

vote type 1 3 035

Backfire

By Anonymous - 14/07/2012 20:10 - Nigeria - Lagos

Today, my dad was making coffee for the family. Half-way through, he excused himself to the bathroom, so for a laugh, I discreetly poured a load of salt into his drink. When he served us, I drank a mouthful and doubled over hacking. My dad barked, "I wasn't born yesterday, son." FML

agreeclassic 7 176

vote type 1 54 792

Are you new?

By Anonymous - 28/06/2012 02:28 - United States - Lakewood

Today, while walking around the local thrift store, I noticed an attractive guy watching me and following me through the aisles. As he followed me to my car I was sure I would get his number. He then asks me to bring my purse inside as I had been tagged as a shoplifter. I work at the store. FML

agreeclassic 27 786

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