Today, my dad was making coffee for the family. Half-way through, he excused himself to the bathroom, so for a laugh, I discreetly poured a load of salt into his drink. When he served us, I drank a mouthful and doubled over hacking. My dad barked, "I wasn't born yesterday, son." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dad was making drinks for my mom and himself, so I asked him to make me some coffee too. When he brought me my drink, I took a sip, and realized he'd poured salt in it. As I gagged, he muttered, "Next time, make it yourself." FML
Today. I was sitting up having coffee early in the morning, still half-asleep. My dad walked in, getting ready for work. He asked if that was my water sitting there. He thought it must've be his, so he took a big gulp. OMG, I'd forgotten I'd poured a glass of pure white vinegar last night. His face was absolutely hilarious. FML
Today, I jokingly mocked my dad about his age. He jokingly poured milk all over my head. FML
Today, my dad was making a sandwich in the kitchen. Hungry, I snuck in and grabbed it, running back to my room and devouring it. Later at dinner, he dumped a whole scoop of rice in my lap. We all ended up laughing as we cleaned it. FML
Today, while relaxing in the kitchen drinking coffee, my dad suddenly rushed in, knocking me over and causing me to spill boiling hot coffee all over myself. Then, my dad thought it would be a good idea to grab the sprayer from the sink and douse me with cold water in order to "put me out." FML
Today, I had some soup that my dad made. I took one sip and found he had put tons of hot sauce in it. I rushed to drink from a soda can sitting on the counter, only to find that my mom had used it as an ash tray the night before. I can still taste the hot sauce, and the ash. FML
Today, after waking up, I went into the kitchen and took a swig of milk from the carton. I overestimated my strength, and the whole thing splashed all over my face. A few moments later, my dad staggered in, looked at me in disgust, and said, "You know what? I don't even wanna know." FML
Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML
Today, my dad came home and wanted to grab a glass. It wasn't in direct sight so he slammed the cupboard door so hard, I peed my pants. FML
Today, I witnessed my dad wake himself from a nap with his own fart and start panicking in confusion. I guess I shouldn't have broken down laughing, because he demanded to know what I did to him. He didn't believe the truth and bitched me out for screwing around. FML
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Top comments
astoryofroses 9
karma
olpally 33
never test your dad's brain power... he knows way more than you do about how to pull off a prank.
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Comments (120)
howrudoin 11
First one to tell you YFDI, I guarantee you will have many more.
Steve95401 49
You're lucky it was just salt in the drink and not something poisonous.
99megster 15
I doubt his own father would poison his drink...
AbstraktThoughts 13
1 - Cause everyone walks around poisoning their dad's coffee all the time...
CoconutOil 7
Well, a laxative would make a nice gag! And you don't have to kill your family!
Zachthejoker 10
Someone's never heard of a practical joke.
KiddNYC1O 22
I doubt he would poison his own father's drink...
Arachu 5
It's not luck. He put salt in the coffee, not poison.
astoryofroses 9
karma
brackaman 18
More like super mega awesome dad for the win. If I was OP I'd give my dad a medal engraved to say “Touche good sir” cuz that was hilarious.
DreBeezy 9
Good sir, it seems as though you have been pwned by your own father.
888pickles888 4
This looks like something from the book Shit My Dad Says
waco60 3
Good thing op's dad had a good sense of humor about it.
olpally 33
never test your dad's brain power... he knows way more than you do about how to pull off a prank.
sadistmonkey 19
Your dad would beat you for a completely innocent prank that doesn't harm anyone and is, at most, annoying? And you think that's a well adjusted way to handle the situation? I think OP's dad's choice of action is a much more efficient way to teach the OP a lesson. The punishment should match the situation (although I don't think what the dad did is really a form of punishment, nor do I think the situation calls for one).
daisiebud 18
The funny thing isn't that the Dad got him back, but that he was actually expecting his kid to pour salt in his coffee. What.
erockinthesuburb 17
You reap what you sow.
dominic1221 6
I think it's kinda sad that you get 4 thumbs down for pointing out social cause and effect, but #3 gets 3 thumbs up for invoking spiritual nonsense like "karma." Yeah, I'm ready to be buried by the superstitious knee-jerkers now.
Squelchy 1
#9, it's basically the same principle. Both karma and this saying boil down to "what comes around goes around." There's no reason to be rude about the idea of karma and by extension to the people who believe in it. Calm down.
SNICKERZforKYLE 4
Like A Boss
MindFreakazoid 10
Never Talk Like This unless it's a book/movie title or something like that.
aersie 13
It's a song title.
drunkandfml 11
35- Not in this context
99megster 15
Troll dad strikes again!
DocBastard 40
No. Regular dad bested troll son.
FlamingTacos 7
Nice try Lloyd, but next time stick with turbo lax
challan 19
my favorite movie of all time!
brill33 7
Who's your daddy!
whosyourpapa 7
I was planning to register that as my id, but only got the current copycat one, anyway, war3 rocks, XD
brill33 7
What the heck is war3?
BriZanna33 2
Lmfao!!!!!!