Today, I had to sneak out of work to get my daughter from her school. Apparently, she had thought that hurling a bowling ball down the stairs during the lunch hour rush would make her cool. In actual fact, it made her expelled. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was expelled from school. By my own mother. FML
Today, in the absence of my god-daughter's parents, I went in their place to see her elementary school's principal. She apparently stood up to a known bully's violence and retaliated, sending said bully to the hospital. Not only she may be facing expulsion, I may get sued by the bully's parents. FML
Today, my daughter was expelled from her school for beating another kindergartener with a Dr. Seuss book. FML
Today, when I went to pick up my daughter from preschool, I found out she'd "accidentally" tried to flush her clothes down the toilet while going to the bathroom. FML
Today, I got expelled from school. I was walking down a flight of stairs when I tripped and bumped into a kid ahead of me by mistake. He fell forward and took half a dozen people down with him. The staff think I did it on purpose, and there's talk of charges being pressed. FML
Today, I slipped on a crayon a little girl threw on the floor, causing me to drop the tray of water I was carrying, making me spill it all over her. After getting cussed out by her mom, I was fired for making a customer unhappy. FML
Today, I tripped over a kid at work. She was sitting on the floor with her legs sticking out into the walkway. Her mom caused a scene, accusing me of doing it on purpose. FML
Today, I had to pick my daughter up from pre-school because she repeatedly hit another kid with a stick. Apparently, my parents have been letting her watch violent action movies again. FML
Today, I tried to put the little girl I babysit in timeout for lying to me. I was about to sit her down when she made a mad dash for the basement stairs, slipped on the wood floor, and fell down them. She told her parents and everyone at the ER that I had thrown her down the stairs. FML
Today, I was teaching when I saw a student leave her chair and brazenly head for the door. I clapped her on the shoulder and said, "Going somewhere, miss?" She vomited all over my pants. FML
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Top comments
imseksie 0
She got balls..
Il_Maestro 6
Apparently that was strike three.
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Comments (217)
imseksie 0
She got balls..
skorka 5
Bigger than mine. My parents would have be le shit out of me
bitch_pleez 10
No, I believe the reason she was expelled is because she no longer has balls.
nerobluerose 10
Don't get fired for sneaking out to pick up your Expelled daughter. One is enough for today.
samadams43 0
Apprently bowling balls. Where do you even find those in a school?
MidnaLink 35
46 daddy probably has one that she snuck in
samadams43 0
Shit cray
xoconnie 8
Was she dared or something because since when is throwing a bowling ball down the stairs "cool"? Does this happen in anyone else's school lol
LexiMariee16 0
Anybody know where she got the bowling ball in the first place?
RadikulRam 16
#8 This isn't 9gag, please express all of your "le" on their website.
truth_spitta 0
OP dropped the ball teaching his kid to think before she acts.... Lol
tjv3 10
I think your daughter might have some issues
mhopper 13
She was testing gravity. At least she wasn't discussing it in a cemetery.
bobbos100 2
Lmao
Il_Maestro 6
Apparently that was strike three.
hockeyoceancity 13
Actually if she got three strikes in bowling that'd be a good thing. :p Now gunder balls would be bad.
Random951 12
I hate when I get gunder balls.
Il_Maestro 6
That joke was intended, 17 :)
hockeyoceancity 13
I know but i want to see how many negatives i can get! i think around 50 in three hours or so. Would you care to make a guess?
Il_Maestro 6
No guess, but I'd be happy to contribute to your goal.
Bballboymchs 0
Strike there is basball dumb ass
Idonebeenhad 17
44's comment is so ironic
instnt1nfction 17
Don't thumb him down just leave him there
mhopper 13
Nah, he/she deserves it!!! >:)
KeyboardWarrior 10
44, A strike in bowling is when you knock down all the pins in 1 go.
Rowdey 10
Oh I hope that is sarcasm 62
DomDomxoxo 16
44 is a noob it's his/her first comment it's not his/her fault. But (s)he'll learn.
SirCharles83 13
44- Three* Baseball* And also, you're the "dumb ass"
SirCharles83 13
I edited my comment because initially I forgot what was spelled wrong (three and baseball). The edit didn't work and now I clearly am the dumb ass. This is what I get for trying to correct someone- for the first time might I add.
StoryOfTheYear 15
Threads like this are why I come on FML. Not only can you see dumbasses and trolls in their natural habitat, you also get to see them told off.
melikesfml 11
^^everyone leave this thread or richard simmons will smite you.
minisquid 9
Come at me Rich.
fighterofwar 5
This, all of it,
ohSNAPyall 27
You big turkey!
Neorecon19 18
When did she get a turkey?
CapnCapes 4
"Strike three" is a baseball reference. Try again.
bieberfreak18 0
I moderated this ! yay me * London tipton clap*
emeraldisle 30
At least she will be remembered as the girl who got expelled.
lacrossebrah13 8
That's not a good thing
Il_Maestro 6
Thank the Lord. I was afraid she would have been named "Most Likely to Succeed" or "Valedictorian." No, no, this is much better.
syley 5
Those first 6 words, in 4's comment, mean close to the world to a good number of high schoolers. (I'm giving a reason why the daughter might have done such a stupid act)
emeraldisle 30
It's a ******* joke.
nebula748 14
Your joke was shitty.
mgkgambino 3
Your daughter is a boss
user324234324 1
Being expelled is the least of her worries. Better get ready for all the assault charges.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
There were too many tall white kids wearing red necklaces.
maxmex13 7
who were also slightly chubby
MsConfusedd 27
You really needed to sneak out? Wouldn't you be allowed out to help your children?
yankfan89 27
Not all bosses allow their employees to leave unless it is a medical emergency.
bieberfreak18 0
I don't know if my comment didn't add or it was thumbed down. I moderated this. Yay.
lotrgeek 10
Today, my mom snuck out of work to come pick me up from school. She thought hiding my expulsion would make her look like a better parent, but instead it made her look unemployed. FML
ihasbrains 10
That was, by far, one of the stupidest comments I have ever read on FML.
Cartera 10
You realize that you aren't clever, right? These comments are always the worst.
KiddNYC1O 22
Guys, shhh. The puppy is sleeeping... ^
bwtchinheels 0
Go write an FML then.
mhopper 13
10, was your FML regarding the scared puppy ******** on the carpet? :)
pegasus187 9
You fail
lonkite101 14
Kids think that's cool. -_-
hellohazel 12
no, OP's daughter did though. and you have to admit, it would be pretty interesting to see a bowling ball roll down the stairs at school
KiRaKaT 9
Not as cool as a dog rocking the guitar!
hellohazel 12
haha i've seen that at school actually! it's alright if you're into that sort of thing :p
chelseaaababyyy 17
35 - Not if you're the one being hit by it.
ilovesuju 10
I'm not a kid... And I think it's pretty boss
DocBastard 40
Ilovesuju - The fact that you used "boss" as an adjective invalidates your entire argument. Not to mention the fact that you are indeed a "kid" if either of the people in your profile pic is you.
ilovesuju 10
Ok well people use that statement all the time so I guess I'm just used to it now, I never thought of analyzing it. Plus my picture was of me, I'm a girl,but I recently changed it and the picture I have now is of a guy in the band "super junior" hence my name "Ilovesuju". It's a celebrity crush.
ilovesuju 10
And I'm 17, I was talking age-wise, but my personality is still very much like a child haha, I love it
DocBastard 40
Suju - 17 is very much a kid, trust me. I know, a lot of 17-year olds seem to think they are adults and can take care of themselves. You don't see it until you're well past it, believe me.
ilovesuju 10
well dont stereotype all 17 year olds as kids
downtime 13
LOL you think at 17 you aren't still a kid? Even legally you're still a child by law, at least in Australia, and as far as I know that applies in all western countries. Hell, you can't even drink in the US yet, kid.
ilovesuju 10
whoops,looks like your right, but this isnt worth arguing over so i dont know why you guys care so much about proving if im a kid or not lol
niplipsip 9
159 - you fought well, young one.