Today, I walked into a room, where a guy was violently picking his nose. He kept picking. A very pretty girl walked in after me, and he immediately stopped and sat up straight. Apparently, I'm too ugly to motivate strangers to stop excavating their nasal cavities. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while driving, I idly started picking my nose. I looked over at the car next to me and saw a smoking hot guy from my school staring at me in disgust. He kept staring until I took a turn-off. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to pick my nose. FML
Today, I was walking in the park when I saw an attractive girl walking nearby. I approached her to strike up a conversation when suddenly a large fly invaded my left nostril, and became lodged inside. After picking out the bloody fly pieces, I looked up to see the girl walking away, gagging. FML
Today, I was stuck in traffic on the highway and decided it was the perfect time to pick a humongous booger out of my nose. While carefully examing and admiring it, I failed to notice that the owner of my company was staring at me from the left lane in complete and utter revulsion. FML
Today, the ugliest girl in school walked by me and said "ewwww". FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me to pick his nose for him. FML
Today, I had to stop my 26 year old fiancé from picking his nose and eating it like a little boy. Three times. FML
Today, my girlfriend caught me picking my nose and eating the booger. FML
Today, my husband decided to pick his nose out before he would kiss me. FML
Today, while I was walking along the sidewalk, someone passed by and said, "Tuck that nose in." FML
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Top comments
ViolentBears 0
I think he was trying to say that if you were a booger, he'd pick you. He didn't want that girl see him confess his undying love for you.
PrittyinPit 0
It's okay OP! You shouldn't feel bad when someone who is PICKING their nose doesn't find you attractive. The feeling should be mutual. :D
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Comments (138)
boratt 0
that sucks!
largefoofighter 0
the fact you had such a concise FML tells me you aren't hot.
Happygofucky 0
I know, right? Because pretty girls couldn't possibly effectively express themselves while writing. Shit, I must be pretty ******* ugly :(
largefoofighter 0
see 30 least you understand the rules lol
sterlingarcher 1
wow that stinks!
CitrusGirl 0
Rule of life: women can't be smart and attractive. Here's some examples Sarah Palin: pretty but stupid. Grimke sisters: ugly but smart
Happygofucky 0
Out of all the possible 'pretty but stupid' examples, you chose Sarah Palin!?
largefoofighter 0
haha I know right!!
i_love_grrr 0
wtf?? lok
CitrusGirl 0
It's a joke lol, if you have better examples feel free to share them.
largefoofighter 0
Paris Hilton, Jessica Simpson.......
Happygofucky 0
Well, Paris tends to look like a deformed horse, but we are getting closer to the mark.
largefoofighter 0
you're just talking about her ******
Grimmerie 31
she's actually quite intelligent. paris just puts on the stupid act.
laurbear12 3
how about Natalie portman? she's gorgeous and went to harvard...
KiddNYC1O 22
Kelly Pickler for crying out loud.
JetLifeNextLife 0
maybe you weren't worthy enough to make him stop
s_tricka 0
OMG U CAN'T GET A GUY TO STOP PICKING HIS NOSE. I rlly wldnt care cuz I ur crying over that, wait til u hav sex with a guy then realize he picks his nose wen ur not around.
Jvr91 8
well thinking anyone walking by would make him stop but u didn't,well u must be pretty...damn ugly
TheNewGuy03 29
67 -- natalie is also funny. :D "we love you, natalie!" "I WANNA **** YOU, TOO!" also, obvious nwa reference. |the kid|
hannah1203 2
Is anyone else wondering how you can "violently pick your nose?"
sarapsosis 1
90- thanks to you I now got a weird image in my head haha
0opsie 6
#90: When it looks like you're stabbing your brain.
laurbear12 3
who doesn't want to f Natalie Portman?! lol
josephhhhhh 0
Megan fox is a goddess
Thabb 0
Am I the only person who realizes that a nasal cavity is NOT the same thing as a nostril?
ladybug108 0
I just happen to think she's at least a little smart....
ladybug108 0
that was for the Sarah one. dang:(
divya_sucjs 0
men's rule, we like *****
leeshxx 3
72, please speak English
BigBoiToys 0
Haha good shit... Made my day
MasterE56 4
that was me!!! and yes you are ugly! ;)
soapiemonster 0
that's mean:(
MrsLender_fml 3
He was only digging for gold to find the treasure and impress you OP!
Gknd 0
Gary F**king Oak
born_hustla 26
lol
JojoChuo 8
Bet you was glad I walked by then x))
BadBoyz90210 0
i love how you say violently... he probably gave himself a nose bleed
toriluva 0
Reese ur such a Anthony gaOne
Pinson18 0
well u would sure keep me from continuing to dig in.
briandunlikelmo 0
lol ydi for being ugly
i_love_grrr 0
ha what did you say?
netherflame 0
VIOLENTLY PICKING HIS NOSE!
SirEBC 7
He was probz intimiadatied by ur big werdz.
sarapsosis 1
for realz
GetChiZZedoN 0
win ^^ lol
Wiggy_78 0
Lmao
Voqab 3
u spelled intimidated wrong...Sorry
KiddNYC1O 22
103- He did that on purpose.
duckie227 22
he also spelled 'probably' 'your' and 'words' wrong so I'm guessing it was intentional.
ryanebk 7
spellcheck freak.
SoundnVasion 0
happened to my cousin corey once, hes in highschool
jibz 6
Why do you even care what he thinks? The guy was picking his nose in public... He should be writing this FML.
mikolyshka 0
agreed this isn't your problem. its his.
CrazyManNo9 29
The guy picks his nose in public and you're concerned about his opinion? Who can possibly care what HE thinks?
TiNyBuBbLeZ 0
he was violently picking his nose
mygreenhoodie 0
it's probably because the op has low self esteem
ViolentBears 0
I think he was trying to say that if you were a booger, he'd pick you. He didn't want that girl see him confess his undying love for you.
FAsInFML 4
^^ Hahaha, this made my day lol.
Happygofucky 0
Yeah, I'm going to start picking my nose for guys I have crushes on. I'll let you know how it goes ;)
Happygofucky 0
Yes, finished with a kiss on the tip and a sexy wink.
sarapsosis 1
ewww that's nasty precog lol but funny nonetheless
narrowords 18
Awww, so sweet.
KingDingALing 9
What's next? Are you going to stick your finger in your a-hole and let him sniff your finger afterwards?
Wiggy_78 0
Ewww^ Lol
RedPillSucks 33
no, no, no! You're suppose to pick their nose seductively....
cassiesandra 0
you're so adorable.
BabbiiLovvee 0
ugh dip.
aiden2976 0
that must be itD:<
PrittyinPit 0
It's okay OP! You shouldn't feel bad when someone who is PICKING their nose doesn't find you attractive. The feeling should be mutual. :D
i_love_grrr 0
agreed lol
holymolybro 0
Looks like you have an ugly situation.
MasterE56 4
boo! you stink!
holymolybro 0
I will steal your damn Pokemon.
MasterE56 4
noooooooooooooo
DoULie21 0
Atleast he stopped though.