The Top

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"Found", eh?

By Panda_bruh96 - 14/08/2021 02:01 - United States - Minneapolis

Today, I found a bunch of half-naked girls saved in my boyfriend's phone, and only a handful of the pics were of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 052

You deserved it 242

Have a Coke and smile

By Cokerella - 14/08/2021 18:01 - United States - Pomona

Today, at a work function, I noticed that my boss and my girlfriend kept leaving the room at the same time. Fearing the worst, I waited outside in the hallway. As soon as they went into the bathroom, I pushed my way in. Sex? Nope. They were doing lines of coke off the bathroom counter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 307

You deserved it 151

Frugality

By Gingertabs - 23/08/2021 22:00

Today, I found out I am only entitled to £63 government assistance a month. I haven't worked or even left house for a year and a half, as my agoraphobia/anxiety has spiraled out of control. I don't know how I'm going to live. FML

I agree, your life sucks 856

You deserved it 344

By PaePae - 15/06/2019 04:31 - United States - Columbia

Today, I found out that I'm sensitive to the NuvaRing. It felt like I was a buffet for fire ants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 784

You deserved it 177

Missed connections

By Anonymous - 05/09/2021 14:01 - United States - San Diego

Today, I found out the guy I had a huge crush on back in college, and still think of every day, actually did like me back. Except I’ve been married for nearly 8 years to someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 1 181

Festive spirit

By Christmas'nt - 28/11/2022 22:00

Today, it's that time of year again: my mom has threatened to disown me if I celebrate Christmas in any way, shape, or form. Yes, she is an extreme bible thumper. No, she doesn't see what is wrong with her behavior, nor does she care. FML

I agree, your life sucks 941

You deserved it 108

Lost in translation

By Ariane - 03/12/2022 00:00

Today, I work as an executive assistant. My French boss wanted to do business with a big American customer, so he sent her an email suggesting a meeting. He copied me so that I could arrange said meeting. He had written, "Have your ass talk to my ass." FML

I agree, your life sucks 929

You deserved it 122

That's capitalism, baby!

By Anonymous - 13/09/2021 04:59

Today, I went to see three houses to buy. For the past year I've been trying, but investors swoop in and buy the house cash to turn around and rent it. I just want my first actual home for my family, but one of the houses I was going to put an offer on already has a cash offer on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 176

You deserved it 113

The struggle is real

By Anonymous - 10/11/2025 09:00

Today, my husband keeps falling sick or imagining that he's sick. We started the year with flu, then back pain, then a sprain, then a ligament tear, and now a bacterial infection. On the days he's not sick, he has zero interest in physical intimacy, scared that he'll catch an STD. We're a married monogamous couple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 442

You deserved it 101

You rang?

By thathurt500x - 26/06/2020 20:08

Today, my boyfriend's tooth got caught on my nipple ring and ripped it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 032

You deserved it 595

The grind

By Gunaditya - 26/09/2021 23:00

Today, what did I get after a long, tiring week? A long, depressing weekend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 845

You deserved it 140

Work sucks, I know

By Anonymous - 01/01/2023 22:00 - Malaysia

Today, it's my second week of internship, I have like 8 more weeks to go and I'm dreading it. It's an office internship and I HATE being in office environments. The sounds of the phone ringing, doorbell dinging, loud typing, and fluorescent lights? Argh, I want to end myself! FML

I agree, your life sucks 378

You deserved it 946

Celebration

By worksucks,Iknow. - 30/08/2018 15:00

Today, it's my first anniversary of being a manager. It also marks a 12-month period of 30% loss in monthly income, combined with 30+ hours/month of overtime. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 594

You deserved it 452

High on emotion

By Anonymous - 10/07/2020 05:00

Today, a woman I’ve liked for years falsely claimed to be strung out on crystal meth rather than just turning me down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 418

You deserved it 163

J'ACCUSE!

By hurtswhenipee3 - 11/01/2023 16:00

Today, I got a urinary tract infection. I didn’t realize men could get those. Worse yet, my girlfriend thinks it’s an STI because, “IF I’M NOT FUCKING YOU, SOMEONE MUST BE!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 156

You deserved it 218

The bird

By Mariah Barnes - 24/07/2020 08:01

Today, I saved a baby bird from the site I work on. It was the runt and did not have any feathers and was neglected by the mother. I took care of it all day at work and planned on taking it to a wildlife reserve after work. Two minutes away from the reserve, we hit a pothole and I dropped it. It died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 778

You deserved it 266

Gamers rise up

By Anonymous - 30/10/2021 13:59 - Canada - Prince George

Today, I’m officially at the point where I can’t blame others for not wanting to play on the Playstation with me. I don’t even want to play with myself. I suck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 763

You deserved it 293

Fill those slots!

By Anonymous - 05/06/2024 16:00 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, my girlfriend pawned in her mother's engagement ring so she could gamble at the pokies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 489

You deserved it 123

Kinda sus

By Forgotten - 27/01/2023 02:30

Today, I found out my boyfriend went to a “Lovers New Year's Eve” party. I didn’t go. He told me he had to “work” that night and couldn’t spend time with me. When I confronted him about it, he told me he “forgot” to tell me and it was “a last minute thing.” We’ve been dating for 3 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 078

You deserved it 163

Quiet quitting time

By Anonymous - 26/01/2023 04:00

Today, I went to do a drug test for a new job. While I was there, they said the job was part-time with no insurance. Previously it was supposed to be full time with insurance. Now I have to take a job that pays $20,000 less a year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 857

You deserved it 125

Sounds like a catch

By Anonymous - 10/08/2020 08:06

Today, my psycho ex tried to call the cops on me for "poisoning her food." I live two hours away from her, and have no money or gas to go anywhere near her. Turns out, she poisoned herself for eating raw chicken and pizza dough. I have a child with this idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 770

You deserved it 365

Tailor Swift

By Anonymous - 21/11/2021 07:59

Today, my fiancé has one leg shorter than the other after it was half blown off in the army, and his specially made wedding suit was delivered. They got the leg lengths the wrong way round. The wedding is in two days and he may have to wear his pants backwards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 374

You deserved it 119

Bee Movie 2: Electric Boogaloo

By Anonymous - 23/08/2020 08:02 - United States - Santa Ana

Today, I woke up to the inside of my house covered in bees. Hundreds of them. I have been complaining about a bee problem to the HOA for two weeks, and their response has been, “The hive was taken care of." Well, a few hundred bees inside and a few thousand on my outside wall beg to disagree. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 713

You deserved it 130

Dogs > Landlords

By Anonymous - 25/11/2021 13:58

Today, our landlord has begun eviction proceedings because he’s received over 100 complaints about our dog, who barks constantly, and who my wife has stubbornly refused to get rid of. My wife has basically forced us to choose between that fucking mutt and being homeless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 966

You deserved it 679

Ghosted

By LunaRayne13 - 10/09/2020 08:02

Today, I realized it's been over a month since my last therapy session. My therapist canceled on me and never got back in touch to reschedule. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 206

You deserved it 229

It is a bit weird

By huh? - 28/09/2020 14:02 - United States

Today, my wife called me a pervert and a degenerate for lusting after a teenage girl. I’d found some old pictures from high school and remarked about how sexy she’s always been. It was her I was talking about. I said she’d always been attractive, but liking her as a teen is now weird I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 577

You deserved it 255

Heavy load

By Anonymous - 01/01/2022 16:58 - United States - Verona

Today, I had to place under the carpet another patch of 1/4" plywood over another broken spot in the hardwood floor. My not-so-flatmate refuses to anything about her morbid obesity, and will definitely cost us our deposit when the landlady finds out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 960

You deserved it 219

Out of the blue

By Kellie - 11/01/2022 01:59

Today, my high school sweetheart and husband of 20 years sent me a text, saying, "You will notice I'm no longer living at home. I moved in with my parents while you were making dinner tonight. There's no one else. I'm just over the being married & stuff." Twenty years and dumped / divorced via text. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 073

You deserved it 154

Make it so

By AndTheStupidShallRule - 16/01/2022 05:02 - United States

Today, the person who signs off on my work asked me to change numbers on a federal report, saying my logic didn't make sense. They have a bachelor's degree in education. I have two graduate degrees in math and computer science. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 010

You deserved it 142

Freaked out

By Anonymous - 14/01/2022 23:01

Today, just like every morning, I had to make myself throw up all the acid in my stomach just to make room for a little bit of food. No doctor can fix my problem, and my family still thinks I’m doing it to lose weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 139

You deserved it 153

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The Top

Today, my girlfriend made bacon sandwiches for lunch. I didn't want to be rude, but I couldn't help but mention that the bacon smelled and tasted weird. I thought it may have expired. She said not to worry because she used the dry bacon under the counter. Those were dog treats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 111

You deserved it 4 782

Today, my boyfriend wanted to show me a magic trick. He filled a bowl with wine, pushed it on top of the ceiling using a broom stick, and held it up there. He told me to hold it and left. Taking my hands off the broomstick would cause the bowl to fall on my expensive new suit. Eventually, it did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 263

You deserved it 12 503

Today, my mother continued her lifelong habit of talking to anyone who isn't white in extremely slow, exaggerated "caveman" English. She insists that she isn't being racist, but rather is helping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 482

You deserved it 4 691

Today, a bee flew into my car, I panicked, swerved off the road, and hit a mailbox. It was a metal keg filled with cement buried in the ground. Taking my father's advice, I fled the scene. Later, my mailman knocked on my door holding part of my bumper. He said, "Excuse me, I think you hit my mailbox this morning." FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 487

You deserved it 44 910

Today, my dorm's fire alarm went off. In the rush to escape, I slipped and fell off my bunk bed, breaking my ankle in two places. Crying, I told my roommates I needed help to walk. They shrugged and left after mentioning that I would slow them down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 297

You deserved it 295

Today, my girlfriend of three years broke up with me, saying I don’t make her happy, I don’t make her laugh, that she feels she is settling for me, and that she's not being pleased sexually. Even though she has always said I did all of that, and that we could work through anything. I was going to propose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 131

You deserved it 373