Today, I had to fall asleep to my next-door neighbors having sex because our walls are paper thin. What bothered me the most wasn't listening to them doing it, but knowing that she was faking it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I came back to my dorm only to hear my neighbor having loud sex. I thought I was just thinking when I said, "At least do it against the other wall," but when I was left later on, he walked by, apologized and said that he thought I wasn't home, and promised to be more quiet next time. FML
Today, for the second week in a row, I woke up to the sound of my awful upstairs neighbors having sex between the hours of 1 and 3 AM. Their bed is so noisy, and earplugs barely help. At this point, based on the rhythm of their bed squeaking, I can tell when they're about to finish, and I hate it. FML
Today, I heard my parents having sex. It wouldn't have been so bad if we weren't in the same hotel room. They thought I was asleep. FML
Today, I've had no sleep. Why? Because my housemate has a new girlfriend and the walls are too thin. After round three of them shagging, I was exhausted from holding my breath each time the new girlfriend screamed. I also realised that was the closest I'd been to sex in months. FML
Today, I can hear my parents having sex in the next room. FML
Today, I was having sex with a girl. She was really into it and not holding back on the noise...That is, until I received a text message from my little sister next door reading "If she is making that much noise, she is probably faking it...Trust me, I know." FML
Today, I got permission from my parents for my boyfriend to stay over. Things got intimate, and I tried my hardest not to make too much noise. However, while having a post-sex cuddle, we heard my parents in the next room muttering about my "faking". FML
Today, I pretended to be asleep when my mom and her best friend came home because I was tired as hell and I didn't want to be around them. I was then treated to a loud conversation about my mom's first time with a woman through our paper-thin walls. FML
Today, I couldn't fall asleep till 3am and was woken approximately every hour or so. Why? I found out my new upstairs neighbors have a very active love life. She's a screamer. FML
Today, I wanted to sleep in after a rough week, only to be woken up by my roommate's sex screams and the pounding of her bed against the wall. Earplugs did not help. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
organizse 28
Bang on the walls and tell him "I can do better"
julianbozikovic 20
Leave a sex tip book for your neighbor on his door! I think he'll get the hint :D
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (89)
tbro47 23
Time for a fake moan off. See who can be louder
squarecircles 13
Sorry you had to go through that, OP. There's nothing worse than bad acting.
cari_cat 19
I'd like a follow up comment, just to hear what was so fake about it? I don't understand how you'd know through a wall. Either way, FYL for having to hear it.
ZombieSazza 34
I imagine she sounded like one of those **** stars fake moaning "oh yeah.. Give it to me like that... Oooh right there...", it probably sounded like she was in a porno.
kuro21 20
You should go over and teach him how to be better.
lm6161 4
Omg. If I didn't know better I could have sworn I wrote this post myself... My neighbour sounds like the fakest **** star ever.
iPixiee 23
Why would they fake it?
limabeans101029 21
In an attempt to save the guy's feelings, to try to convince themselves that they're enjoying it, etc. Faking it isn't a good idea but I can understand the reasons behind it. Or maybe she wasn't faking and she just enjoys being loud
iPixiee 23
Oh, yeah that makes sense. thanks for explaining 55. don't get it why people downvote so fast thoug' :/
stephanyovalle 15
Next time yell at them "you sound like *insert hardcore pornstar name*" and I bet she'll stop haha
yolololol3 17
You should play the music real loud and sing the song really loud to
False_Stupidity 42
I'm sure that will really help the OP to get to sleep...
a1_z9 10
Poor you, reminds me of a house I used to live in where my neighbour's sex noises sounded like a sad dog. Fortunately she didn't get laid very often!
FuKcMee 32
this is fml worthy? i listen to this shit every single day