Today, I found out that pinching the tip of the condom before you roll it down to the base is NOT a suggestion. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out that applying toothpaste to your penis to make it taste good for your girlfriend is not a good idea. FML
Today, the condom slipped off, because my boyfriend refuses to admit that he needs to use smaller condoms. FML
Today, my wife's boyfriend learned that you can't flush condoms. FML
Today, I had to explain to my husband why saving the condom from the first time we had sex is not romantic. FML
Today, I decided to practice putting a condom on with my mouth. Then my roommate walked in on me using my mouth to roll a condom onto a banana. FML
Today, while finally about to make love with my long-term boyfriend, he came from putting a condom on. FML
Today, my father pulled me aside as I was heading off to my girlfriend's house. He said, "Next time you have sex, don't leave the tied up condom in its wrapper inside your shorts pocket, otherwise your mother might find it again as she's folding laundry." FML
Today, I found out the hard way, that yes, a condom can break. Also, that sometimes when it does, your boyfriend won't say anything until you start having morning sickness. FML
Today, I learned that when someone is choking you don't do the "hymen maneuver", you do the "heimlich maneuver". I was corrected by my girlfriend's parents. FML
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that fist pumping during sex is not romantic. FML
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Top comments
FD929 0
Congrats on your future child. I hope you make enough at Burger King to afford it.
yukonesian 0
you should have said 'condom sense' ah boom cha!!
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Comments (142)
DevinCam03 14
Lololol
Allie614032 34
No shit, Sherlock.