Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got a new downstairs neighbor. Herpes. FML
Today, I was riding the bus. Suddenly, it appeared to start to snow inside the bus, and I assumed a window was open. When I looked up however, I discovered the girl in front of me putting her hair up in a ponytail. The so-called "snow" was coming off of her head. FML
Today, the men clearing the walkway outside my dorm room with a snowblower didn't realize that my window was open. I looked over from my computer to see snow shooting in, covering my clock, closet, and radio. Now it's melting. FML
Today, I was sitting at my college campus; there were good looking girls all around me and I was trying to catch their eye and smile, letting them know I'm available. A butterfly flew by me and I screamed. FML
Today, I'm super sick with a sinus infection and delirious from a lack of sleep and all the meds. When I walked into math class, a boy asked if he could sit next to me. In my head I tried to say, "This is college you have the freedom to sit anywhere you want." All that came out was, "Freedom… everywhere." FML
Today, I told my dad that I had a herpes infection. He said, "Good." FML
Today, I went to the movies with my boyfriend, and ended up sitting next to this girl who wouldn't stop sneezing. Grossed out, I asked my boyfriend if we could switch seats. After doing so, the girl immediately stopped sneezing and started flirting with him. FML
Today, we're in the middle of a contagious deadly pandemic, and despite not having physical/sexual contact with anyone in over a year, I managed to contract herpes. I don't even know how I got it. FML
Today, I passed by a cute girl who was staring intensely at me. When I glanced in her direction, she smiled. Taking this as a positive sign, I approached her. Before I could say anything, she handed me a flyer explaining the benefits of STD testing. Apparently, I look like I need it. FML
Today, at school, a cute girl kept glancing up at me, giggling, and looking away as soon as I looked at her. So naturally I walked up to her and asked if she wanted to go out sometime. She said she didn't like me, she was just laughing at how big a zit was on my forehead. FML
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Top comments
VasilisaUzhasnaj 29
For some reason, I pictured Luna Lovegood saying it.
SephoraGypsy 15
"There's herpes in the air today." *Awkard silence.* "I hope they have pudding." *Hops off ledge, skips away." Scene.
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Comments (111)
mugu 0
I'd like to know what u remarked after that !!
may651 14
"Man get the **** out of here." (yes I know it was a women) lol
thisisafunnyname 12
*woman
mugu 0
That would have been the most appropriate response lol :D
chaziztheman 0
I don't understand how this qualifies as an FML.
eraintime 0
I don't understand this one.
Torva_fml 16
Op look at pretty snow. Pretty girl come sit by op. Op think girl cute. Op try to talk to girl. Girl randomly blurts out some shit about herpes... Helpful? You're welcome.
KeyboardWarrior 10
You're wrong too, 39. For one thing, OP's a girl. She was joined by a girl who was also fascinated by the snow (it nowhere says that she thinks the girl is pretty). The girl blurts out some random shit, and OP is left there thinking: 'dafuq?'.
Torva_fml 16
Oh, I'm sorry. I guess I was already starting to fantasize about two girls and a lovely snowy background.... And yes, I did realize they were both girls, hence the reason I deleted "then ops penis randomly decided to invert"... So yea... :/
jcrotty19 4
Lol, dafuq
Torva_fml 16
Why my comments keep getting deleted ~.~ RAGE!! not really... :/ but what the hell... Trying to justify why my comment was wrong.. :/
rbaalman 4
If you need justification just dont post
KaanTech 0
Torva there this is that penis you deleted saying shit while ******** and reading a book on 75's profile picture 0_o with glasses must be nerd one Btw the head is look like darth wader's head Your argument is invalid
KaanTech 0
Oh shit i said wader sorry Sorry Darth Vader it is...
AugustBurnsToast 14
Her perception of life is...different lol.
olpally 33
Her perception of life... Is ****** up! Lol who says that???
TheEpicMilkMan 13
could you imagine what she thinks when its windy out?
datoismyname 22
Well that's college for you.
mugu 0
That was one awkward conversation
gamercanadian 11
She really sounds like one of those psycho girls out there.
Keevarou 17
Not really psycho, she sounded more kind of unserious ^^ The first I thought about when I heard "herpes in the air" is "love in the air" if herpes is transmitted from contact between lips or mouth, which can be considered a sign of affection or love, hence "herpes in the air"
KeyboardWarrior 10
I think that you are overthinking it just a bit. I'm going to go with her being a little crazy.
tygerarmy 35
Awkward? I found it hysterical. You should've commented "no wonder my allergies are acting up."
gurly98 13
Awkwardliness at Its best
noto_fml 0
Think OP of this FML took the girl a little too srs, she might have just been making a joke. With that said W T F. ***** just weird.
Sparks808 10
This reminded me of Loony Luna in Harry Potter. I could see her saying something like that.
smellymellyy 7
You mean Luna Lovegood? Where's 'Loony' from?
evamusical 12
Thats her nickname, dont you know? From lunatic...
burro_fml 6
160- You obviously haven't read te books or paid attention to the movies if you didn't know that was her nick name.
katcot99 11
Technically, there is.
VasilisaUzhasnaj 29
For some reason, I pictured Luna Lovegood saying it.
SephoraGypsy 15
"There's herpes in the air today." *Awkard silence.* "I hope they have pudding." *Hops off ledge, skips away." Scene.
stevenJB 25
Luna is the most adorable person ever!!!! I wish she was real :(
BeClassy_BeMe 3
#6 I thought that too!
miss_sqwert 19
thats exactly wat i pictured.
challan 19
Haha me too! I can see the crazy glassy stare and secret smile!
trahelion 0
So glad I wasn't alone on that one.
perdix 31
That's funny. I pictured Phil Collins singing it.
yankfan89 27
23 paints the perfect picture
katarinapetrova 0
I could so see that!
mk58 31
Me too! She's probably one of my favourite characters, other than Snape!
mayasylvia 1
me too...
muggle_born 6
I swear I was just about to type that!
vettle 6
Me too!
iStrukk 7
I wish my girlfriend was as bubbly as Luna.
Derwinx 2
Lol me too xD
ebfbruh 0
Who?
curiousllama 0
ME TOO!!!!
ClosetTroll 10
Fair warning.
greenmen 12
That's a weird way to say she doesn't like sex
katcot99 11
A girl and a girl?
immaMonsta 8
#6 What the hell? Sex isn't even mentioned in the FML.
bigdog57_fml 9
*#7
bingababe 16
# 18 girls have sex with girls believe it or not!