Mystery
Today, we're in the middle of a contagious deadly pandemic, and despite not having physical/sexual contact with anyone in over a year, I managed to contract herpes. I don't even know how I got it. FML
Today, we're in the middle of a contagious deadly pandemic, and despite not having physical/sexual contact with anyone in over a year, I managed to contract herpes. I don't even know how I got it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out I have genital herpes. I'm a virgin. FML
Today, my boyfriend, who I have been seeing for a year, decided to tell me that he has herpes and has not taken any precautions to stop it from passing on. We have had unprotected sex quite a lot over the last year, so now I most likely have herpes too. FML
Today, I learned I don't have a yeast infection. I have herpes. FML
Today, I found out I have herpes. I'm 9 months pregnant and have only been with my husband. It just so happens that our roommate just got over herpes. I thought they were just spending time together, bonding. FML
Today, my husband and I were diagnosed with herpes. We've been together for five years and were both virgins before. Even the doctor couldn't give any other explanation. FML
Today, after receiving a negative herpes test four months ago, my doctor called me and told me it was a false negative and I’ve been living with herpes for four months. I then had to tell everyone I’ve slept with about it, and worst of all my new boyfriend broke up with me. All in one day. FML
Today, I got a new downstairs neighbor. Herpes. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend gave me a surprise birthday present: herpes. FML
Today, I found out that my ex (he's 35) tried soliciting sex from one of my friend's daughters (she's 22) and a few other friends as well. To make it all worse, I just found out this fuckboy has herpes, and contracted it while cheating on me. FML
Today, I realised I had a bad month. Last week, I threw out my back; the week before, my girlfriend got a cold sore; this week, I got chickenpox at the ripe age of 31 years. When I went to bed last night, I found my girlfriend sound asleep with her vibrator in one hand. We haven't had sex for so long, I can't even blame her. FML
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Top comments
Blimix 9
Most of the time, herpes is asymptomatic. You may have contracted it years ago, and only just had your first outbreak. Often, that coincides with times that your immune system is weakened, either by stress or by fighting off a cold or other disease.
peterblack67 9
It can be dormant in your system for years. I'm guessing the stress of the pandemic is why its happening now.
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Comments (4)
Blimix 9
Most of the time, herpes is asymptomatic. You may have contracted it years ago, and only just had your first outbreak. Often, that coincides with times that your immune system is weakened, either by stress or by fighting off a cold or other disease.
peterblack67 9
It can be dormant in your system for years. I'm guessing the stress of the pandemic is why its happening now.
Yudith 28
It must be this pesky glass of water at the office or your lip balm that your coworker borrowed. Or maybe it's this stupid pen you kissed because you were so happy to find one at school in time of need. Herpes does live a long time on surfaces.
ThoughtsofaDame 12
Herpes isn't a big deal like 90% of the population has at least some form of it.