thelunarwolf
Today, while trying to have a serious conversation with my husband about his drug use over text, he came home. Drunk. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Helen
Pine Bluff, United States
Today, my husband came home drunk off his ass at 2am. He started crying on my shoulder because he couldn't go home with some beautiful woman who hit on him, because sadly for him, he's married to me. FML
rachaaaaeul
United States
Today, I was texting my boyfriend about yesterday, where he told me how much he loved me, and he wishes we lived closer. I asked him if he really meant it. Turns out he was drunk, and had no idea what he was talking about. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff
France
Explain yourself
Today, I received a text message from my wife, who had gone out for the evening with some girlfriends, saying, "I have to take a friend home, she's drunk! I'll be staying at his place. Call you in the morning." Umm… His? FML
TheOtherWoman
United States
Today, the guy I've been sleeping with for the last three weeks got really drunk. I drove him home from the party and took care of him. At 2am he asked for the phone. When I asked what for, he said he wanted to drunk dial his girlfriend. FML
Anonymous
Party animal
Today, my husband woke up, tried walking to the bathroom, fell down, got back up and started peeing on the carpet. I’ve never seen him this drunk before. FML
sober
This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff
United States
Girl…
Today, I got a text message. It said, "I'm so drunk. What you up to, girl?" It was my dad. FML
Carpet cleaner
Canada
Wait for the hangover
Today, my husband came home late from drinking with his buddies, only to toss and turn and keep me up for an hour. He then sat up and didn't move for a few minutes. I sat up to see what was wrong, only to see him pissing on the carpet beside our bed. FML
Anonymous
Groningen, Netherlands
Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband reacted by going out and smoking weed, then getting completely shitfaced, and having his buddies drag his nearly-comatose carcass back home from a strip club. FML
U...
Dude, chill out
Today, my friend got a text showing his girlfriend cheating on him. Sounds like his FML, but he was at my house. He then worked his way through a bottle of my whisky and went into a drunken rage. He threw my furniture through windows, punched holes in the wall, and smashed stuff until I had to call the cops. FML
Username
United States
Today, I drunk texted a guy I like. We'd met at an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. FML
Top comments
Southerndatageek 2
Who has a serious conversation like that via text?
safetyword 0
YDI for trying to have a serious conversation via text.
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Comments (131)
seahorses4eva 4
T-T-T-T-TIME FOR AN INTERVENTION! Just be sure that you, his mom, dad, sister, and brother...all text him at the same time. Otherwise it won't work.
Joshwarrior 39
I find it funny that you didn't use fml as an example, since I am sure there are quite a few people addicted to it as well. :)
Joshwarrior 39
@66 for some reason it doesn't let me reply to other comments = /
happyFace12 0
check him into rehab. ydi for marrying a pothead
seahorses4eva 4
How do you know he's a pothead?
happyFace12 0
ok druggie. she still married a dude on drugs
allmidnighteyes 11
"serious conversation... ...over text" YDI
summahpaige 3
you deserve it for marrying an idiot
flakitaa22 0
alcohol is not a drug. -__-
MissBunny25 0
it's classified as one. it's a drug that is a depressant . go read a health book. but personally in my point of view I don't look at it as a drug. even though you can get addicted... if you look up caffeine, that's classified as a drug as well.
ChibiChibi_fml 28
The definition of a drug is: A chemical substance, such as a narcotic or hallucinogen, that affects the central nervous system, causing changes in behavior and often addiction. You could also use the dictionary.com definition which includes: any article, other than food, intended to affect the structure or any function of the body of humans or other animals. You can look at it any way you want but both alcohol and caffeine are most definitely drugs because they both play with your body chemistry.
Moose28 0
You couldnt tell he was drunk when you were texting him?
rockerbaby3192 0
If he was driving while drunk and having a serious texting conversation then I'm rather impressed with his skills.
kirstendanielle1 0
no Jim I completely agree with everything you said. I wasn't trying to imply that anyone with some sort of addiction is pathetic, or that people who have serious drug or alcohol problems are hopeless either. I only meant that the op's boyfriend of the fml may be a lot more dependent on the drugs he does than the girl I was replying to.
kirstendanielle1 0
I don't know why this posted all the way down here and not in reply to the thread I was trying to reply to.